Tragic Beauty (Beauty & The Darkness #1)(46)

I’m so exhausted, my chin falls to my chest.

He undoes my bindings, ankles first, then wrists, supporting me so I don’t fall, then carries me to the mattress, lies me down, and slips off my blindfold. I curl up on my side, away from him, wincing when my arms press against my breasts.

Shayne sits down next to me, his hand on my hair again, petting me when he says, “When you wake, you shower and clean up good, so you’re ready for next time. Everything you’ll need is in there. Got it?”

I manage a nod.

“What else are you going to do for me?”

“Shave,” I whisper, my voice so broken I wonder if he heard it. But I know he did, because he says, “That’s right. I’m going to leave you a razor for that—and for your legs and under your arms too—but if you use it for anything other than shaving…” He leaves the words hanging for a minute. “Then I’ll consider that as good as breaking your word. And you know what that means, don’t you?”

I curl my hands up tighter under my chin, and nod again.

“Alright. Sleep now. I’ll be gone when you wake up, but don’t worry, I got cameras set up, so I’ll be with you, even when I’m not here.”

He stays there a little while longer, petting me while my breathing slows and my tears dry. I try to think of green eyes, but my mind is useless. Done. Nothing but a black hole.

I hear his soft voice drift again. “You kept your word tonight. Ava. Let’s see if you can keep it up.”

After a bit, he leaves me curled up on the mattress, and shuts and locks the door behind him.





CHAPTER TWENTY




Ava




When I wake, I can barely move. My eyes feel heavy, my body broken. Slowly, I blink, that dim light still hovering above me. I just want to keep lying where I am, and pretend I don’t exist, but there’s a pressure on my bladder. A pressure I can’t ignore.

I cry out when I roll over to the edge of the mattress, then manage to stand. I keep my eyes down, trying to ignore the dark, grey world around me. In the bathroom, I avoid the mirror and collapse on the toilet. That’s when I remember there’s no door in here, and I remember the cameras too. I close my eyes and try not to think about where they might be. Instead, I hear his words. ‘Shower and clean up good, so you’re ready for next time.’ Then I remember the other thing he made me say. ‘Shave.’

The tears are falling when I flush and stand, then turn on the shower. My eyes graze over sienna tiles and a stone floor, over chrome fixtures and a pretty vanity, things he couldn’t really change. It’s all lost on me though. All I see is darkness.

A new kind of pain strikes me in the shower when the water runs over my nipples, then my brand, which still hasn’t fully healed. I cry out, sobbing by the time the pain begins to settle. But the sobs don’t stop. Because it’s the pain on the inside I can’t get past. My mind feels like it’s falling into nothing, knowing what’s ahead of me, but then I think of Gavin. His green eyes. His smile. His touch. And while those memories make the pain on the inside grow even deeper, the strength inside grows with it too.

For him.

Everything I do in here will be for him. And that’s what has me reaching for the razor. That’s what has me shaving and getting cleaned up good like I was told. It’s Gavin that has me brushing my teeth and drying my hair while I try not to look at my bruised face and weary eyes.

When I walk back into the room, I zero in on the closet, because there’s nowhere else to escape it all. The light above me has no switch, something I figure he wants kept on so the cameras can see me.

I head to the closet and curl up in the far dark corner, like I did last time. I’ve only been there a few minutes, when I hear the click and start to tremble. The door opens and I see him walk in. I wonder how he knew I was ready for him, but then I remember the cameras.

He moves past the closet, a face I barely recognize, except for the black hair, raked back, like always. He’s dressed in all black again, only this time wearing a shirt. and carrying things I can’t make out.

He disappears for a minute, and I hear things being set up, then I flinch when I hear his voice.

“Come,” he orders.

For him. Do it all for him.

I get myself up this time, and walk into the room with eyes down, but off to the side, I see what he was carrying—a folding chair he’s set up at the end of the bed, with a tray table next to it.

When I get close to the beast, he points to the floor. “Hands and knees.”

I do as he says, and stare at the cement while my hair hangs down around me.

“This is how I want you,” he says, “every time I come in here. As soon as you hear that lock turn, you get your ass over here and wait, just the way you are now. You should be in place before I get to this spot. Understand?”

I nod.

He takes in a breath and crouches down near my head. “I’ll accept that, Ava,” he says. “Consider that a show of mercy, and be grateful for it, but if I ask you a question that requires more than a yes or no answer, you’ll speak up. Got it?”

I nod again.

He stands and begins pacing back and forth in front of me, moving slowly. “I’m going to give you some rules,” he starts, “so you know what’s expected of you.” He sounds so strange, so off, like he’s nothing more than a strict teacher talking to a pupil on the first day of school. “I’ve come up with a handful for now,” he goes on, “and I know more will come up as we go along, but this will get us started. You already know not to look at me. I think I made that point clear. You’re also not to speak unless spoken to, and you’re not to call me by my name. Ever.