To Have It All(91)
Picking it up, he stared at it. Something inside him, something he didn’t quite understand, made him want to keep it. Almost as if he didn’t have a choice. Clutching it under his arm, he stood and gazed once more at the world he’d turned his back on—his daughter, finally understanding that he had to give her up. At least for now. He could only hope to have her in his life one day if he stepped away. Maybe when she was older he could explain, make her understand better. Maybe by then he’d understand himself a little better, too.
I stayed with him when his feet began to move, leading him away. He didn’t bother to think of where he was going. He just went. I knew there were days when he’d get lost inside his head, where he was consumed by his loneliness, but walking seemed to help. It kept him moving. If he didn’t make himself move, he worried he’d never get out of bed. He didn’t know I was leading him, gently pushing him toward his destiny. Ten blocks later he ended up in a booth at a diner. It wasn’t just any diner. It happened to be on the corner where he’d almost died in a terrible accident, but someone had saved him. A name he refused to speak or think of.
Setting the stuffed animal on the table, he stared out the window, remembering how he’d left the man that saved his life to die. Was there any coming back from that kind of evil? He doubted it and the thought filled him with hopelessness.
“Hi there.”
Looking up, he found a beautiful woman, her blond hair tied back in a tight ponytail with glossed lips.
“I haven’t seen you in a while,” she went on.
She knew him? He couldn’t remember having ever met her. When he didn’t answer, she tilted her head, her smile falling.
“I’m sorry,” he stuttered. “I had a little accident. My memory is a little fuzzy.” He motioned at his head haphazardly.
She frowned, then her gaze moved from his face to the cat. He fought the urge to cringe as he realized she’d think he was insane for being a grown man carrying around a stuffed cat.
“That’s Pearl’s cat,” she said, surprised.
His mouth hung open. He had no idea who Pearl was or how to respond. Did she think he’d stolen it?
“She hasn’t been here in about a year. Have you seen her?”
“The gray-haired woman?” he asked. “She gave this to me, but I don’t know why.”
Placing a gentle hand on his arm, she asked, “I’m off in fifteen. Would you like to have some coffee and I’ll tell you how I know you and all about the cat?”
He gazed up at her, wondering why in the hell she’d want to sit down and waste a minute of her time speaking with him. “Are you sure?”
“Yeah,” she smiled. “You look like you could use a friend.”
“I doubt you’d want to be my friend,” he mumbled.
She stared at him, the hairs rising up on her neck as she felt someone whispering to her that wasn’t even there, telling her not to let him push her away. Her gaze softening, she responded quietly, “Something tells me that’s not true.”
He nodded in agreement then motioned to the unoccupied bench in the booth. “I’ll be waiting for you to join me, then.”
As she patted his shoulder and moved to finish her shift, I drifted away, focusing on the whispers around me, searching for where I was needed most. Max was in good hands now, and though I knew I’d still look in on him, it was time to share my magic with someone else.
“I’m heading out,” Lenny hollered from the office door.
I waved from the third garage bay. “Have a good night, man,” I yelled back. “I’ll lock up.”
“See ya tomorrow,” he called. As the office door shut, I glanced around, a feeling of gratitude washing over me. It had been a few months since I started working again, but every day it hit me how damn lucky I was. Lenny had done it. He’d taken the money I’d given him when I was Max and opened his own shop. When I’d got back on my feet—literally and figuratively—after months of rehab and physical therapy he hired me. I was back doing what I loved. It had been a long year, but the best one of my life. I made sure to bow my head every day and give thanks. A walking miracle, the press had called me because I should’ve died. I went from a dirty bum, who barely warranted a glance from the average passerby, to famous because I’d awakened after a traumatic brain injury that should have been fatal. It had been surreal.
After I woke up, Waverly told me about Pearl and her visit, the things she had said. We all searched for Pearl, scouring the city streets, but she had vanished. I missed her, but I knew in my heart she was okay. She had always been okay. After all, she was karma. Pulling myself from my thoughts, I hurried to clean up my work bench and wipe down my tools. Waverly was picking me up in ten minutes, and I didn’t want to make her wait. The garage had closed almost an hour before, but I wanted to stay a little later to work on a special project.
“Hey there, handsome,” I heard, causing me to snap my head up. Waverly had just entered the garage through the office. Not one day had gone by since I woke up where we hadn’t seen each other, and every day the woman still took my breath away.
“Hey there, beautiful,” I beamed as I wiped my hands on a rag, watching her every step. “You’re early.”
“Well, Matt and Alice were so engrossed with Pim I was able to slip out pretty quickly.” Matt and Alice had just returned from their honeymoon and were dying for a night with Pim. As much as that sweet little girl owned my heart, I was dying for a night alone with her mama. She had almost reached me when she stopped dead in her tracks and gaped at my special project. “Are you serious, Liam?” She smirked.