To Have It All(35)

Packing a bag, I left and went to Matt’s. I lied and told him Max was out of town and I didn’t like staying at the apartment by myself. Max texted me that afternoon, hours after the appointment had been scheduled.

How’d the appointment go? I stopped by the apartment, but you weren’t home. Where are you?

He thought I went through with it.

I didn’t respond.

Maybe it was the hormones from pregnancy. Or maybe, as much as I hate to admit it, I was a pathetic woman convinced I could change him. I don’t know, but somewhere in my warped brain, I convinced myself Max would change his mind about it; that he would want our child. My first move in helping him come to this conclusion was to give him time and space. Though his words had cut like a knife, I could understand how having a baby so soon might have panicked him. We had only been married a few months, and our courtship had been short. So much had happened so fast, maybe he felt overwhelmed. Space—I’d give him space. He just needed time to wrap his head around the idea.

I hid out at my brother’s house for a week. I had to contact all of my professors and feign stomach flu so I could miss classes and do my work from home. Other than the text he’d sent after the appointment he’d scheduled, Max didn’t attempt to contact me again.

Hurt.

Unadulterated raging hurt.

I felt like I was suffocating in it.

Finally, unable to stand it anymore, I went home to our apartment, hoping that night we could sit down and try to discuss it again. I wanted to understand his feelings; why didn’t he want our child? Was he scared? Did he think he’d be a bad father? What was it? Maybe he just needed some reassuring.

I was worried but determined. We would work this out. I would not let us fail. With a heavy sigh, I inserted my key into the lock, preparing myself for the discussion ahead.

It didn’t work.

He’d had the locks changed.

Numbness washed over me as I felt the blood drain from my face. Sliding down the door, I melted into a heap as tears streamed down my cheeks. Pulling out my cell, I called him.

“Waverly,” he answered.

“Hi,” I croaked. “I’m trying to get into the apartment, but my key isn’t working.”

“That’s because the locks have been changed. You won’t be living there anymore.”

“Max,” I breathed, my heart sinking. “Why are you doing this?”

“You didn’t go to the appointment.”

“No, I didn’t,” I agreed, swiping the tears from my warm cheeks. “I couldn’t, Max.”

“Then you made your choice. The front desk has an envelope for you. It has the location and key to the storage unit where I had all your stuff sent. My lawyer is working on an annulment. I don’t want to see or hear from you again.”

Then he hung up.

I must have sat there for hours, numb and clueless. How did this happen? I knew Max was selfish to a degree. I knew he could be insensitive, but this . . . was this who he was? Had I been blind?

In the following months, I reached out to him thousands of times. I sent him sonogram photos and texts and emails. He never replied. He never lifted a finger to help.

And now he wanted to be a hero; be a father?

Helen couldn’t know how cruel Max had been to me so maybe she couldn’t understand my reservations. “He’s never bothered to help before.” I glared at her. “So why now, Helen, huh? Why should I accept his help now?” How dare she tell me to accept help from Max. Could she even comprehend what a selfish asshole he was—how terrible he’d been to Pimberly and me? If she was anything like me when I first met Max, she was stupid and blind. I’d thought he was amazing, too. Apparently, she was under the same illusion.

“Maybe . . .” she looked up at Max, then back at me, “maybe Max is a different person now.”

I snorted, almost choking on the knot in my throat. Before I knew it, I was grinning, the idea that Max was now, after a lifetime of being a jerk, suddenly a good person. That he was a different person. Was this lady for real?

Max held his hands up in surrender, clearly frustrated. Kneeling, he met my line of sight. “I’m not going to sit here and beg you. If you don’t want to stay with me, let me at least keep Pimberly until you’re up and running again.”

“Absolutely not,” I sneered as I jerked forward. “I’m not leaving my daughter alone with you for days.”

“You need help,” he pointed at me before pointing at himself, “I’m offering. I understand in the past, I haven’t been there for you, and I can’t promise I always will be, but I’m here now, Waverly.” Standing up straight again, he dragged a wide palm down his face, attempting to calm himself.

Letting out a defeated breath, I turned my head from them, fighting tears. Helen was right. It is freaking hard to be a single parent. I’d been lucky to have Matt to help me with so much, but even with his help, there were days that I struggled.

“You guys can come stay at my apartment,” Max offered. “You two can have my bedroom, and I’ll crash on the couch.”

Lifting my chin, my lip trembled as a tear rolled down my cheek. I hated this. I hated this so damn much and yet, he was my only option for help until Matt and Alice got back. “Why are you doing this, Max?” I croaked.