The Summer Deal (Wildstone #5)(85)

Another laugh bubbled out of her. “And you said, ‘Oh yeah, I have. What I haven’t seen before is a woman so beautifully unafraid to speak her mind.’”

He nodded and then his smile faded. “I never knew you felt that way. That you don’t feel seen.”

“People who know me see my disease. People who don’t know me just see a cold, unreachable woman.”

He smiled. “You like that though.”

She managed a small smile in return. “Yeah. Like I said, good at misdirecting.”

He ran a thumb along her jaw. “What is it? Something’s still wrong.”

“You’re not the only one I blew it with.”

“Brynn?”

She nodded.

“She found out you knew where your dad was before you told her yourself,” he guessed.

“Just like you said would happen.”

Not one to say “I told you so,” he shrugged. “So go fix it.”

“It’s not that simple.”

“Family is family. You can be annoyed, irritated as hell, fight with them . . . whatever you want, but you don’t just let them go.”

She stared up into his face, cupping his jaw in her hands. “How did you get so wise?”

“The love of a good woman.”

She sucked in a breath. He meant her. He thought she was good for him. He thought he loved her. So who was she to argue with him? “I thought it was only sex with us,” she admitted. “But it turns out, that’s just how you hooked me.”

He snorted.

“I mean it,” she said. “With you there’s an emotional, intimate connection that scares the shit out of me. But . . . it’s what makes it impossible to walk away from you.”

“And yet you managed,” he said lightly.

“No, I didn’t. I tried, believe me I tried, but I couldn’t.” She turned to fully face him, meeting those warm, dark eyes. “I need you in my life, Deck. I’m sorry it took me so long to figure it out. And I get that you might not even want to take another chance on me, but if I don’t at least try to fix what I messed up, I’ll regret it for the rest of my life. And I don’t know how long that might be, but—”

He kissed her softly, then not so softly, pulled back and pressed his forehead to hers. Given the look in his eyes, she figured he was about to say something incredibly sweet.

“Did that hurt?” he asked.

She laughed.

He watched her like she was the best thing he’d ever seen. Clearly not caring that they were on a public bench outside a pancake house in Bakersfield—which by the way looked a little bit like Mars and was hotter than hell—he hauled her onto his lap. “You called me,” he said. “Do you know what that means?” He cupped her face and made her look at him. “It means you want me in your life. You’ve known for a long time that I love you,” he said seriously. “I’m keeping you now, Kinsey. No take backs.”

Her heart was pounding in her chest as she slid her hands into his hair. “No take backs.”

His eyes were still very serious as he raised his hand to touch her cheek. “A long time,” he repeated, softer now.

She let that soak in. Love had never done much for her except hurt. She’d always believed that that was what love was, a way to hurt someone. “What if I die?”

“You do realize you’re not the only mortal here, right? I could get run over by a bus tomorrow.”

“Deck.”

“Or you could dump me and rip my heart out. Again. Either way, we could lose each other. But why are you wasting what time we do have? I know you love me back, Kins.”

She nodded slowly. “I do. I love you, Deck. I love you so much.”

His breath whooshed out. “I’ve always known you’d walk when things got too heavy, that you’d push me away, especially if your health took a turn for the worse. That you’d steal time away from me. But when it happened, it still nearly killed me.”

“You still might lose me,” she said. “But I can promise you, it won’t be because I choose to walk away. Not ever again.”

This time it was the six-foot-five tough guy whose eyes went shiny. “Forever then,” he whispered against her mouth.

“Or for as long as you’ll have me.”

“Forever,” he repeated. He met her gaze, fingers in her hair. “But I know you, babe. We can’t do this, we can’t do us, until you do what you’ve gotta do with Brynn.”

That he so thoroughly understood her brought tears to her eyes. “I know. I’m going to try to fix that. And then Eli. And then you and me. But that does not make you my third priority.”

“I know. And we’re already fixed, babe. Go do what you have to do. I’ll be there when you’re done.”

The words he didn’t say, didn’t have to say, were that he always would.





Chapter 25


Brynn got out of the Uber at the address she had for her dad and took in the apartment building in front of her. It was utilitarian, with no landscaping other than the weeds growing through the cracks in the asphalt parking lot. The neighborhood looked sketchy at best, and she turned back to the Uber to ask him if he’d wait for her, but he was already gone.