The Romantic Pact (Kings of Football)(101)

I take a deep breath and read.

Dear Hazel Girl,

If you’re reading this letter, it’s probably because you’re too caught up in your head. Am I right? I know I’m right. You’re brilliant and hardworking, but your one downfall has been putting your blinders on. You tend to see black and white when you’re like this. There’s no gray for you.

I’m here to tell you, Hazel Girl, there’s plenty of gray in this world. The choices you make in life can’t always be clear-cut decisions. You’re going to have to open your eyes to see all the colors in between when making a choice.

One of the things I always loved about working with you was your loyalty and dedication to the farm and to my family. But I noticed, when you got your mind set on something, you convinced yourself that was the only way to do it, and never sought out other options. You got fixated and, once again, those blinders went on and you didn’t see the world around you.

You tend to crawl inside your mind and don’t put yourself out there. I fear that you’ll become so fixated on one thing, that you’ll forget to look up occasionally. You won’t remember to breathe in the fresh air. You won’t remember to make connections. You won’t find what’s really important in life—love.

Work is just that—work.

Possessions are just that—possessions.

Both will bring you pain and joy, but they won’t satisfy your heart.

Love is the only way to do that.

Please don’t be so consumed with the black and white that you forget to learn to love in the gray.

I love you, Hazel girl.

Pops

I set the letter down and squeeze my eyes shut as I sink deeper into the couch.





Hazel: Good luck today. I know I probably haven’t said it before, but I’m proud of you and everything you’ve accomplished.

I stare down at the text I sent Crew, my heart aching from his lack of response. But, then again, I don’t blame him. I haven’t been very warm lately.

“Hazel, are you in here?”

I pop out of the bathroom and find Mia walking into the farmhouse with a box of pastries.

“You can’t keep bringing me food,” I say, while pulling my hair up into a messy bun.

“If I didn’t bring you food, you wouldn’t eat.” She pauses and studies my shirt. “Are you wearing Crew’s shirt?”

I glance down at the Braxton College shirt he let me take while we were in Germany. I paired it with leggings today because it was the only thing that gave me comfort this morning.

“I am.” Before she can question me, I say, “Can we talk?”

“Oh, boy. Am I in trouble?” She cautiously sets the pastry box on the dining room table.

I chuckle. “No, you’re not in trouble.” I walk over to the coffee pot in the kitchen and ask, “Do you want some coffee?”

“Sure,” she says with trepidation. “Are you . . . okay? You seem surprisingly calm.”

“Yeah, I’m fine.” I bring over two cups of coffee and flip open the pastry lid, revealing cherry Danishes. I smile and say, “These look amazing. When we were in Germany, Crew and I became addicted to these pudding Danishes that were to die for. I was looking up recipes on how to make them just last night.”

I hand her a Danish on a napkin and we both take a seat.

“Sooo, are we talking about Crew now?” She stares me down. “Frankly, I don’t know how to approach your mood. I hate to be crude, but my ass is clenched, waiting for you to flip a switch.”

I chuckle. “I’m not going to flip a switch.”

“Um, okay. But can you understand why I’m skeptical? You’ve sulked around the farm for the last month, and then today, you’re back to normal? What the hell was in that letter?” She leans forward and waves her hand in front of my face. “Are you drugged? You can tell me. Blink twice if it’s a yes.”

“I’m not drugged.” I break off a piece of my Danish and say, “I just did some thinking last night and I wanted to talk to you about it.”

“Okay. As long as you won’t judge me for eating two Danishes, I’m here to listen.”

“I would never judge you, because you know I’ll eat two as well.”

“Then I’m all ears. What’s up?”

“I’m going to move.”

“Uh, what?” Mia blinks.

“I read the letter you gave me yesterday. It took me a long time to decipher what Pops was saying, but I think I finally understood around two in the morning. I think I’ve been putting all my energy into a possession, like the farm, and it’s given me tunnel vision. I’ve forgotten to look around and recognize that all my memories of this place are safely in my heart, and I don’t need the physical place to help me remember. I don’t need the farm to help remind me of home, because my home is in someone’s arms.”

“Wait.” She sets her Danish down. “Are you saying you’re going to move to wherever Crew goes?”

I slowly nod. “I think so.”

“Oh my God, Hazel, that’s . . . I mean, wow. Are you sure you’re going to be okay with that?”

“I think it’s going to take some time getting used to not having the farm, but this past month I’ve been miserable, and I don’t think it’s because of the investors looming over my head. It’s the fact that I don’t have Crew here with me. I knew it right away when I saw him on the airplane. My soul begs for him, my heart craves him. I can’t stop that feeling, no matter how hard I try. The farm provides complacency and comfort, but I think it’s time I venture out. Maybe find my way in this world.”