The Retreat(32)

‘The attic,’ Julia said.

‘Has it been converted? Is there a room up there?’

‘No. There are a few boards down, but it’s just used to store junk.’

I went out into the hallway. There was a chair near the top of the stairs. I fetched it and stood beneath the hatch to the attic.

Julia came out of Karen’s room. ‘What are you doing?’

‘I want to set everyone’s mind at rest. Prove there’s no one up there.’

I tugged at the hatch and, with a sudden jerk and a blast of dust that filled my eyes, it came free.

There was a metal ladder, also furry with dust, and stiff and reluctant to shift. But I managed to pull it down.

‘Is there a light up here?’ I asked.

‘No. Hang on.’ She fetched her phone from her room, switched on the flashlight and handed it to me. ‘Use this.’

I climbed the ladder and stuck my head through the gap. Holding Julia’s phone up, I could make out the shapes of boxes, some pots of paint, a water tank.

‘Can you see anything?’ Julia asked from below. I glanced down and saw that Suzi had come out of her room now and was beside Julia, looking up at me.

‘No. Just a load of old boxes. Hang on.’

I heaved myself up into the attic and shone the flashlight around. It was cavernous, much bigger than I’d expected. I knelt on the boards and peered into the gloom. There was a strange smell in the room, like sweat, but I couldn’t tell if it was my own. I could feel a draft too, chilly air touching my face. Perhaps there was a small hole in the roof.

I crawled further into the attic.

‘Oh shit!’ I shouted.

From below, Julia gasped. ‘What is it?’

‘Sorry. Sorry, I put my hand on something disgusting.’ I shone the light at it and almost vomited. It was a mouse trap, the corpse of a long-dead rat rotting beneath the metal bar. I was worried there might be untriggered traps lying around, so was more careful where I put my hands.

I moved further into the attic until I was, I estimated, directly above Karen’s bed, the place where we’d heard the creak. Just beyond was a water tank, and more piles of boxes. The draft was stronger here. I looked around, trying to locate its source, guessing a tile must have fallen off the roof.

I lifted my head towards the cold stream of air.

Something touched my face – a flutter, the brush of something dry and leathery. I shouted out and threw myself across the space, away from whatever it was that had touched me. I put my head down, curled into a ball, convinced something was about to grab me, something I didn’t believe in, something that couldn’t exist. A ghost. A monster, hunched in the corner. ‘Sweeeetmeeeeat!’ it whispered, and the shadows in the corner of the loft stirred and shifted, and the creature lifted its face towards me.

Priya’s bloody face.

Priya’s sightless eyes.

I put my head down and repeated to myself, ‘It’s not real, it’s not real, it’s not real.’

‘Lucas? What’s going on?’ Julia called up from below.

I lifted my head and raised my phone so the beam of light illuminated the corner. There was nothing there.

Of course there was nothing there.

I angled the beam of light towards the roof. At the same time, Julia climbed the ladder and her head appeared through the hatch. ‘What’s going on? What happened?’

I laughed, aware that there was a hint of hysteria, a top note of madness in my laughter. But as Julia watched, eyes wide and fearful, I got up onto my knees and raised the flashlight higher.

A shadow flitted above us.

‘You’ve got bats,’ I said.



Julia and I sat at the kitchen table, two mugs of tea between us. The ambulance had been and gone, leaving Karen upstairs. She had calmed down and fallen asleep, and the paramedics thought she would be better off staying where she was, rather than being taken to hospital.

‘Maybe she just needs to go home, see her doctor,’ said one of the paramedics. ‘Don’t let her smoke anything.’

Now, Julia said, ‘She asked me to move her to a different room but I didn’t get round to it.’

‘I don’t think it would have made any difference. Perhaps she wouldn’t have heard the bats if she was in a different room, but . . .’ I shrugged.

‘Do you think she’ll be okay?’

‘I don’t know. I hope so. Like the paramedic said, she probably just needs to find some other way to manage her arthritis. She should probably get that cannabis analysed, see if it has been laced with something. Though it might just be really strong skunk. I’ve never done it, but I’ve heard the stuff that’s around now is much more potent than when I was a student and smoking joints.’

It was black beyond the kitchen window. Julia hugged herself. She had tied back her hair and pulled on a black sweater with sleeves that came over her hands. It was warm in the kitchen, thanks to the Aga. Chesney sat beneath the table, purring loudly.

‘So you think she heard the bats, got scared, and then the weed kicked in, made her start imagining things?’ Julia said.

‘Yeah. I guess.’

‘But the things she heard . . .’

‘You’re not welcome here? Maybe that’s how she feels. It could be to do with her status as a writer. Authors like Max look down on self-published writers. He’s said a lot of horrible, snobbish things about Karen’s books. She seems really confident in daylight, but every author I know is a mess of self-doubt and insecurities.’