The One That I Want(9)

On those parting comments, I raced out of the building. I just needed to get home, and then I would be able to breathe, I was sure of it. But when I got home, my lungs were tight. My chest ached, and I couldn’t swallow around the lump in my throat.

I paced my living room, pulling at my hair. Dave had long since fled to the bedroom, eager to get away from me. I couldn’t blame him. I must’ve been pacing my apartment for some time, because when I didn’t meet Paul for our usual lunch date, my phone rang. My stomach clenched when I saw his beautiful, lying face on my screen. I didn’t answer, letting the call go to voicemail, but it rang again and again. It stopped ringing after a while and I turned it off as I continued to pace around my apartment.

What was his game? Why would he lie to me about something so big? I didn’t care who he was. He could be a penniless janitor, and I’d still love him. Why would he do this to me?

My apartment buzzer sounded. I knew it wouldn’t be Paul; he’d still be at work.

I pushed the button. “Hello?”

“Jase, it’s me. Are you all right? I called your work when you didn’t show up for lunch or answer your phone, and they told me you went home sick. Let me in, babe.”

Anger flared, ripping through my veins like lava. “Go away you lying *. I don’t want anything to do with you, Paul Connor Junior.”

There was a long silence. “Jase, please. I was going to tell you tonight at dinner, I promise. Let me in so we can talk. I’ll explain everything.”

“No. I don’t want anything to do with you. You lied to me. Leave me alone!”

The intercom was silent, and tears streamed down my face as my heart broke into a million pieces. Paul must’ve gotten the message and gone back to work. Part of me wanted to run after him and beg him to come back, but I tried to pull my pride back into place. But the longer the silence went on, the more my pride slipped.

I opened my apartment door, ready to run after him, beg his forgiveness, but I ran into a solid wall of Paul standing outside my door.

His arms came around me instantly. “Hey, what’s the rush? I don’t smell any smoke.” Paul’s attempt at humor burst into flames and died.

My pride, along with my anger, found their footing again and surged forward.

I pushed him away, poking him in the chest when his arms fell from me. “You lied to me. You’re not Paul Conway, Marketing Assistant.”

His face fell. “Yes, I lied to you, but before you throw me out, please listen to me. I have to explain why.”

I crossed my arms over my chest, blocking the door, and tried to look as intimidating as possible. I’m not sure it worked.

“Can I come in, please?”

When I didn’t move, Paul let out a heavy sigh and looked at his shoes. Goddamn my deeply ingrained manners. Reluctantly, I stepped aside to let him in.

“Where’s Dave?”

“Hiding from me,” I snapped as I closed the door behind him. “Talk and make it quick, I’ve got plans.”

Paul saw right through me and raised his eyebrow. “Really, what plans?”

“The plan to get you out of here.” Even saying those words felt pathetic. I didn’t want him gone and my chest tightened painfully again.

Paul’s shoulders slumped. “I’m sorry I lied. But I had to know you weren’t like the others. I couldn’t go through that again, not with you. Especially not you.”

When I didn’t reply he continued, his voice quiet and beaten down. “Most guys have always known who I was, and if they didn’t, they figured it out pretty quick. Most of them wanted a free ride, a meal ticket. Some wanted a sugar daddy. None of them loved me for who I am, they only wanted what I could do for them. Money, career advancement, the chance to be seen in the social pages. You name it, they all wanted something from me.”

“I only wanted you,” I whispered, my anger fleeing and leaving me cold.

“God, babe, I know. I hated keeping things from you but I had to be sure. I had to know if you were as genuine as I thought. That’s why I introduced you to my dad this morning.”

“Why did you call him sir and not dad? I thought I was meeting your boss.”

“I know and I’m sorry I deceived you. But there are two reasons. I always call him sir at work, never dad. It keeps a professional distance, especially during client meetings. Everyone knows I’m his son, but calling him dad in the office isn’t professional.”

“Okay. What’s the other reason?”

“Dad is good at reading people. That’s how he’s been able to build one of the most successful marketing companies in the US. Call it a sixth sense if you want, but he can pick up on people’s integrity and moral compass in an instant. He can also tell when people are trying to screw him over. He’s warned me about some of my boyfriends but I was too in lust to listen to him. It always came back to bite me on the ass.”

“Did I pass his test?” My anger had dissipated, but I was still on edge.

“With flying colors, babe. I knew you would.” Paul held his arms out for me to step into, but he dropped them when I didn’t move.

“You don’t have a wife and kids tucked away somewhere?” I needed to know I was the only one and my heart stuttered in anticipation of the answer.

Paul’s hesitant smile was small. “No wife or kids, although I do want kids someday.”