The Mersey Daughter (Empire Street #3)(45)

‘I know, Jack.’ Looking at Jack, seeing his open and honest face, and the adoration for her she found there, regret filled Rita once again, and inside her she felt the deep, persistent longing for this good man that was never far from the surface. ‘I want that too. But this isn’t the way. We’ve got to make the best of what we’ve got, and our time together. Please, Jack, let’s not spoil today.’ She dashed away the unbidden tears that were threatening to overwhelm her. Rita didn’t want to arrive at the farm with red-rimmed eyes or it would upset Michael and Megan, which was the last thing she intended to do.

‘You’re right,’ he said heavily. Then he drew himself upright. ‘Let’s make today a good one. The sun’s shining on us, we’re out in the countryside and we’re going to see the children.’

‘And Joan will have baked a cake, if I know her,’ said Rita, desperately trying to lighten the atmosphere.

‘And will it be as good as one of Kitty’s?’ Jack asked.

‘Oh, I don’t know about that. Kitty’s cakes would knock anyone else’s into a cocked hat.’ Rita smiled but her heart was heavy, knowing that Jack’s words could now never be unsaid. He’d laid his cards on the table. He was good man, the best man, and he was offering her a way out, but deep down she knew it was one she could never, ever take. But if this way was closed to them, then where was their hope for the future? Charlie would never give her up, she knew that, so how on God’s earth would they ever be together?

There was nothing in the world as precious as the first hugs from her children after such a long separation, and Rita treasured every moment. As Michael and Megan ran to meet her, she knew that this time it was extra-special thanks to Jack’s presence. She could see the pleasure in Jack’s face as he took in the sight of his true son, Michael, who, like Megan and Tommy, was positively thriving. Luckily, Jack was being kept busy by Tommy, who couldn’t wait to quiz his big brother about life at sea. ‘And have you shot many Germans?’ he demanded. ‘What was the most exciting moment? Have you brought me any bullet cases? Have you capsized or anything?’

‘Tommy, Tommy, one thing at a time,’ Jack said, bending down and swinging his little brother around. ‘Blimey, I won’t be able to do that for much longer. Look at the size of you. What are you feeding him?’ he asked, catching sight of Joan and Seth.

The kindly farming couple had kept their distance, not wanting to interrupt the reunions. Now Joan stepped forward. ‘Come and see for yourselves,’ she said, shaking Rita’s and Jack’s hands. ‘Oh, it’s good to see you back here. Welcome to the farm. We thought you might be hungry after such a long journey.’

Rita felt a warm glow as she followed them towards the farmhouse, reassured that all was well in this part of the world, even if everywhere else was under threat. She held Megan’s hand and the little girl gripped her tightly, smiling radiantly.

‘Did you help collect the eggs for Auntie Joan this morning?’ Rita asked. Megan had written to her that this was now her job. Rita had felt her heart swell with pride at that – her little girl was getting up early before school to help around the place with the chores, and also that she’d managed to write about it. There had been a time when Megan was so unhappy that it seemed she was going to be slow at her lessons, but now she was obviously flourishing.

‘There were only eight today,’ Megan said seriously. ‘Sometimes there are twelve or more. Auntie Joan says baker’s dozen then. But I think the hens at the far end of the shed are unhappy and they aren’t laying as much.’

‘Really?’ Rita crinkled her eyes in amusement. ‘What could make hens unhappy, pet? Do you think they can smell a fox?’

Megan tutted. ‘We have a big fence to keep out the fox. You have to dig it in very deep, Uncle Seth showed me. No, I don’t think there can be a fox anywhere near them.’ She swung her hand so that Rita’s arm went to and fro as well. ‘No, I think it was the shadow man.’

Michael turned around to face his sister, from where he had been walking ahead. ‘Don’t be silly. There’s no such thing as the shadow man. He’s all in your imagination. Remember what Uncle Seth said about that.’

Megan looked mutinous. ‘Don’t call me silly. It’s true. There’s a shadow man.’

Rita stooped in her tracks and turned to face her little daughter. She crouched down so she was at the same level. ‘What’s this, Megan? Who’s the shadow man?’

Megan pushed back her hair, grown long now. ‘When I go out when it’s getting dark I sometimes feel there’s someone there. But when I go to look all I see is shadows. So I say it’s the shadow man. I’m not making it up.’

Rita gazed at her daughter and saw she was not telling lies, but that didn’t mean there was anything there. ‘Sometimes we all feel like that, Megan. When it’s getting dark you can see all sorts of shapes that aren’t there in the daytime, but it’s nothing to be afraid of. It’ll just be trees or something like that.’

‘Oh, I’m not afraid,’ said Megan, setting off towards the farmhouse door. ‘Come on, Mam, let’s have some of the cake Auntie Joan made. You’ll like it, I did the decoration.’

‘You put some bits of old nuts on it, you mean,’ teased Michael, running past them, followed by Tommy. Megan broke free and chased them inside the house, whooping as she went.