The Man I Love (The Fish Tales, #1)(43)

John went into the lunge and Will picked up Daisy as if she were a pillow, put her precisely on John’s back, fitting her like a puzzle piece. “Feel her hip bone?”

“I do,” John said. He raised and lowered his weight a few times and Daisy moved up and down with him easily, the pose unwavering. John looked over at Erik and his expression turned sly. “Now you, Fish. C’mere.”

“You’re not picking me up,” Erik said, laughing.

“No, dumbass. Put Daisy on your back.”

“Go on,” Marie said. “Try it.”

Erik crossed his arms. “I already know how her hip bones feel.”

Daisy’s head whipped around. “Don’t give away trade secrets, Byron.”

To loud laughter, Erik got up from the floor. “And that’s my cue to exit,” he said with a wave to all. “I’ll be down in the shop.”

As he walked down to the basement, he whistled the refrain of “The Man I Love.” He felt suffused with relief. Knowing Will was partnering Daisy made the pieces of the universe shift back into proper place. Still, once in the shop, helping David wire the tiny lights outlining the buildings of the Manhattan skyline set, Erik wanted to double the number of bulbs. He wanted a ton of light in pink and red and blue to flood out the past couple of weeks.



*



In the middle of the night, Erik and Daisy were startled off the edge of sleep by Lucky. She was calling out her lover’s name but not in the throes of passion. “William,” she said, from the hall right outside Daisy’s door. Her voice was a blade, slicing the peace of the slumbering little house.

“The hell?” Erik muttered, picking up his head.

“William, can you get up and explain to me why James is standing out in the backyard?”

Daisy picked up her head. “What?”

“What?” Will’s voice came from Lucky’s room, slurred with sleep.

“Mom?” Erik said and Daisy giggled against his back.

Lucky wasn’t amused. Her footsteps stomped down the hall and back again, in and out of the bathroom. “Your little friend is standing in the backyard, looking up at the windows.”

They stumbled into their respective doorways, half-dressed and blinking. Lucky stood outside the bathroom, wrapped in a towel, dignified and furious.

“What is he doing?” Erik asked.

“Well he’s not holding up a boom box playing ‘In Your Eyes.’ I would find that quite romantic. Right now it’s just creepy.” Lucky pushed her tongue into her cheek and looked daggers at Will. “Plus I like being able to walk naked through my kitchen without worrying about peeping Toms. I know he’s gay but I’m rather particular about who sees me in the altogether.”

“I’ll go talk to him,” Will said.

“No,” Erik said, holding up a hand and making a sudden decision. “Let me.”

“You?”

“You’ll make it worse. I’m human valium.” Before Will could protest or debate, Erik went downstairs. He unlocked the kitchen door and stepped onto the little back porch. The air was soft with the first breath of spring. A few peepers were having a late-night conversation.

He squinted into the yard. “James?”

A rustle by the hedge. Erik went down one step. “It’s Fish. Come on, James, I know you’re there. Come talk to me.”

James stepped out of the shadows. Hands thrust deep in the pockets of his leather jacket. He looked small. Lost and forlorn. A stray dog.

“You all right?” Erik asked.

“No.”

Feeling an odd sense of responsibility, Erik decided to take the time. Everyone had turned against James. Erik, too, was angry with him, but at the same time something in his heart couldn’t shut down completely. He knew James felt abandoned now. And it was the worst thing for him. Erik owed him nothing, yet he felt compelled to guide James back to a safe place for the night. “You want tea or something?”

James looked up, eyebrows wrinkled in shock. Then his face softened into teary disbelief, as if the act of kindness were too much. “No, I… No. Thank you.”

Erik sat down on the steps. He didn’t beckon to James, but made his body language inviting. James came closer and took a seat on the bottom step, wiping his wet face. He felt in his pockets absently. “I forgot my smokes.”

Erik went back inside and got the communal pack of cigarettes and lighter from the kitchen window ledge. Just in case this went long, he lit a burner on the stove and pushed the teakettle onto it.

Outside again, he gave James a cigarette and took one for himself.

“You don’t smoke,” James said.

“I save it for special occasions.” And it levels the playing field, he thought. Come sit and share a bad habit. We’ll be as one in the same vice.

James closed his eyes as he pulled in the first drag, distilling the hit of nicotine. He exhaled a cloud. “I don’t know what to do.”

“You can’t come prowling around here at night. It doesn’t help to scare the shit out of Lucky and piss her off.”

“I know. But Will won’t talk to me.”

“Look, I know you care about him a lot—”

“I am in love with him, Fish, you don’t understand.”