The Loneliest Girl in the Universe(3)
There’s nothing to look at. I just circle the corridor around the entire circumference of the ship until I’m allowed to stop. At least while I lift weights I can watch my favourite TV show, Loch & Ness.
I stretch out my calves so they don’t cramp, then begin to jog down the corridor. I could do this with my eyes closed.
The ship looks like a giant wheel, rotating as it flies through space. The centrifugal force of the rotation creates a feeling of gravity inside. The helm and the living quarters are around the outer rim, where you’d find the tyre on a wheel. The stores are located in the centre of the ship.
The only sign of the ship’s rotation from the inside is the portholes. When you look through them, the stars spiral around themselves, over and over and over. It makes me dizzy to look at them, especially when I’m running.
I jog past the kitchen and the bathroom and the bedroom and the lounge area and the helm and dozens of other rooms, until eventually I find I’ve circled back to the kitchen. Then I do it again.
On good days, which don’t come often, I love my ship and everything it represents. I thrill at the thought of seeing Earth II. There are going to be so many things there that have never been seen by human eyes before. I’ll get to study the planet using priceless, brand-new equipment that’s just waiting to be unpacked. I’ll discover things that might change the fate of humanity for ever.
The Infinity is the biggest, most expensive scientific mission in history. I get to be the very first person to see the results. I’m so lucky.
On bad days, I worry about my responsibilities until my gut cramps and my head feels full of knives.
On my very worst days, I think of nothing but how vulnerable I am out here. I’m balanced on the edge of oblivion with only a fragile skin of metal separating me from the void of space. My only choice is to carry on into nothing, until the day that The Infinity reaches a new star system and glides into orbit around a rocky planet. If the planet turns out to be hostile – if there’s scorching radiation from its two suns, or an atmosphere fierce enough to turn my lungs black – then I’ll be lost.
I’d have to make the decision to keep going to the next hospitable planet, which might be many years’ extra travel away. There’d be nothing to do but wait and hope that the ship reaches a safe haven before I starve to death. If I never find a habitable planet, I’ll be trapped on this ship until the metal grows old enough to weaken and crack. The oxygen would be sucked from my delicate home, and when that finally happened, maybe it would be a relief; an end to the pointless existence of waiting for death from the day I was born.
Who thought it was a good idea? A life of never seeing a horizon or standing on solid ground?
This whole journey is a balancing act based on faith. We’re all just hoping that The Infinity will eventually be able to reach somewhere safe. And for what? To satisfy the great human spirit of exploration?
My life is a gambling chip thrown carelessly across the universe in the hope it’ll land somewhere my descendants can survive.
I represent the culmination of centuries of human achievement and exploration. But who cares if my name goes down in history, if no one remembers who I really am?
After forty minutes of circling the ship, I stop at the bathroom to have a shower. Then I check my inbox. I’ve been hoping that Molly will send me the latest novel from one of my favourite writers. Maybe today will be the day. An eBook arrived from Molly last week by another author I like, but it’s set in space, so I don’t really fancy it.
I used to read loads of science fiction, looking for characters like me, but it was all so wrong that it just made me feel more alone. Now I read a lot of romance novels. I like the simple ones, set on Earth. Stories that revolve around coffee-shop dates and walks in the countryside.
My fanfics are always set on Earth too. Museums and thunderstorms are so much more exciting than rocket ships and supernovas.
When I play Molly’s new message, she sounds excited, in a way I’ve never heard before.
From: NASA Earth Sent: 21/06/2065
To: The Infinity Received: 24/02/2067
Audio transcript: Romy, I have some big news for you today. We didn’t want to tell you until it was all confirmed, in case something went wrong and we got your hopes up for nothing, but … I’ve had permission from the team here at NASA to tell you that a new spacecraft has just been launched from Earth!
Ever since the tragic accident on board The Infinity, NASA has been building a second interstellar spacecraft to follow The Infinity to the new home of humanity on Earth II.
If we could have built and launched this ship any sooner, we would have. It’s a huge regret to everyone involved that you’ve been alone for as long as you have.
As propulsion technology has significantly developed since your ship left Earth nineteen years ago, The Eternity can travel at much faster speeds. The Eternity launched successfully three days ago, and after a gravity assist around Jupiter it is now travelling at over 0.72 light years, which is eight times faster than The Infinity.
Romy, by the time you get this message, The Eternity is calculated to be only one year away from The Infinity. Once in situ alongside your ship, the two ships will combine and continue together at the increased velocity of 0.72 light years. You will arrive on Earth II on 15/07/71 as opposed to the original estimate of 02/04/92 – a difference of over twenty years.
To be clear, The Eternity is a support for The Infinity. I don’t want you to feel like you’re being replaced. The spacecraft contains a significant gene bank for many species, elemental stocks for 3D technological printing, and a large supply of vacuum-packed food for use on-planet while agriculture is still being developed. However, your mission to establish a settlement on Earth II will still be orchestrated primarily using The Infinity’s equipment and operating systems.