The Kill Society (Sandman Slim)(71)

“And we’re right back where we started.”

We just stand there smoking for a while. He looks a lot more comfortable in the wasteland than I do.

I point to his feet.

“You’re getting dirt on your shoes.”

He gestures to my jacket.

“Check your left lapel. There’s a tiny spot that isn’t completely covered in filth.”

“What am I going to tell the Magistrate when I go back?”

“Tell him I’m with you. That I’ll do my best from my end to see that you succeed.”

“But you’re not going to, right?”

“Right.”

I guess that’s it. I came all this way, bled in the sand, and apparently a stupid little white lie is all I’m going back with. Come on. There has to be something else.

I say, “Maybe you can’t take sides, but you can throw a little chaos into the system.”

“Go on.”

“Let people know you have your eye on them. Miss a few pickups. You know. Death stuff. Throw the universe off a little. You don’t like the job. Maybe you’ll get fired.”

“I do enjoy a bit of chaos,” he says quietly.

Death reaches into his pocket and takes out a delicate amber blade.

“This is the knife I use to sever souls from their earthly bodies. What a lot of people, even in Heaven, don’t know is that there’s a little side benefit to it. It will kill anything. Angels included.”

I take out the golden blade.

“I already have a knife that kills angels. I got it from an angel I killed.”

He flicks the tip with his finger. It rings like a tiny bell.

“Very pretty. The problem is it won’t penetrate an angel’s armor,” he says, pressing the amber knife into my hand. “This will go through armor like water.”

I turn the blade over and over. It feels like it’s vibrating.

“What’s going to happen to you without your knife?”

He drops his Malediction and crushes it under his million-dollar shoes.

“I have no idea, but I’m sure it will be interesting.”

He rubs his hands together.

“And chaotic.”

I put the amber knife in the inside pocket of my coat.

“I’ll get this back to you as soon as possible. By the way, do I have to keep calling you Death?”

He thinks for a few seconds.

“Go back to Samael. As you said, I might not have the job much longer.”

“Thanks. I owe you a drink when this is over.”

“At Bamboo House of Dolls? I’m afraid that’s a bit far for you these days.”

“Nope. I’m going to get home.”

“The eternal optimist.”

“What else have I got?”

He says, “What if you can’t go home? Not all deaths are equal, but this is the most dead you’ve ever been.”

“Are you saying I can’t go home?”

He doesn’t say anything, which says a lot.

Finally he says, “There are some things you can’t trick or punch your way out of. I’m sorry.”

My guts feel like they’ve been dropped down an elevator shaft.

“You’re wrong. I’ll find a way.”

“If you need to believe that to carry on, then believe it.”

I’m getting woozy again and I don’t want to fall on my face in front of him.

“I should probably be getting back.”

“I’m sorry I can’t give you better news.”

I wave it off.

“Don’t sweat it. Oh yeah, in the future, don’t bother with the ‘I don’t take sides’ line. You knew the havoc would find me when you put me on that mountain. This whole thing was your idea.”

He puts a hand to his chest. “Me? Devious? I’m hurt by that.”

“I’ll get our angels to pray for you.”

“What a horrible idea.”

“I’ll see you later for that drink. In L.A.”

“Of course.” He wipes some dust off his slacks. “The next time you want to meet, try to find someplace less desolate. Maybe the surface of the sun.”

He walks away and I’m alone again.

I break the magic circle with the toe of my boot. Kick dirt over the rest and follow the big X back into the hole.

The tunnel is cool and wet. It eases my urge to throw up. Samael is wrong about me being stuck here. He has to be. It’s another of his tricks. He loves his games and jokes. That’s it. He’s playing another angle. He fucking well better be.

By the time I make it out of the tunnel, I’m calm again.

I wave to the ship. No one waves back. They all look at me like I have baked hams on my feet. Finally, Alice comes over and smiles. I walk up the gangplank and she hugs me.

“Why is everybody looking at me like that?”

“We thought you were dead. Some people thought you might have run off, but I knew that wasn’t true.”

I look over and see Doris and Gisco. Both wave. Okay. Someone else remembers me.

“How long was I gone?”

“Eight days.”

“Damn. That was a long nap.”

“You took a nap?”