The Babysitter(43)

Mark pressed a hand to her hair – her gorgeous, copper hair, now blonde. Not Mel’s. This illness was part of her, and Mark realised he’d have to accept it might always be. But it wasn’t the biggest part of her, the person she was. Somehow, he’d deal with this. Help Mel deal with this.

‘Can you promise me something, Mel?’ he asked cautiously.

Mel nodded into him.

‘Will you make a doctor’s appointment?’

Mark prayed hard as he waited again. She hated the damn place. She would go for the kids, no qualms. But when it came to herself, she wouldn’t go to the surgery unless she absolutely had to. He couldn’t make her go, but hoped she would see that this was one of those times.

‘Yes,’ Mel said at last, with some effort. ‘I will, I promise.’

Breathing deeply, Mark pulled her closer. ‘Good,’ he said, overwhelming relief washing through him. ‘So, how about we get good and cosy together? I don’t know about you, but I’m dead on my feet.’ Dropping a soft kiss to her head, Mark eased back, gently lifting her chin to look into her beautiful green eyes. The colour of ferns after the rain, they were peppered with such anxiety and uncertainty it tore him apart. ‘I do excellent cuddles.’ He mustered up a smile.

Mel laughed, a rather strangulated laugh. ‘My white knight,’ she said, her expression now one of immense sadness.

‘At your service,’ Mark assured her, hoping he could be all she needed him to be. That he was strong enough. He would be. He needed to be. There was simply no other option.



* * *



Mark helped her wash her face, brush her teeth and get changed, the body-hugging dress being impossible to get off single-handedly even when stone-cold sober, he imagined.

Now, trying to find the balance somewhere between husband and carer, he eased the duvet up over her. She was facing away from him, curled into a tight ball. Mark’s heart wrenched inside him. Checking the baby monitor, which, mercifully, had remained quiet, he deliberated for a second and then switched it to mute, before quickly undressing and slipping in beside her. She might not need a lover right now, but she needed not to feel alone. He hoped she needed him.

Brushing her cheek with a soft kiss, he slid an arm around her. He closed his eyes as he felt the tension run through her body, heard her trying to stifle her tears. Mark wasn’t sure what to do, what to say. He couldn’t make it go away. ‘I love you, Mrs Cain,’ he eventually murmured, close to her ear, wishing he could show her, but that would be insensitive beyond belief. He settled for holding her instead, waiting until her tears subsided and she relaxed into him. Waiting again, until he heard her breathing slow and felt the steady rise and fall of her chest, he eased quietly back out of bed.

He was desperately tired, but he needed to check on the kids. He also needed to let Jade know the monitor in here was switched off, at least for tonight. He’d heard her going back downstairs and guessed she’d been too disturbed by the evening’s events to easily drift off. He just hoped she wasn’t put off. He hadn’t realised how much they would need her, but they did, now more than ever.



* * *



Mark found Jade in the kitchen, preparing a feed. And clearly, he’d caught her by surprise. She jumped as he came through the door, dropping the lid of the pedal bin faster than she’d intended and wincing as it clanged.

‘Sorry,’ she said, blushing. ‘I didn’t hear you.’

‘My fault. Sorry I startled you,’ Mark said, apologising for the second time in twenty-four hours.

Jade smiled brightly. ‘No problem. I was just making sure Evie’s feed was ready. I didn’t want her crying for too long and waking Melissa. How is she?’

‘Okay… ish.’ Mark shrugged uncertainly. He wasn’t sure how much he should divulge, given his mistake of confiding in Lisa, but, assuming Jade wasn’t already thinking of moving out, she would have to be aware of at least some of what was going on.

‘I made Mel some tea.’ Jade indicated the mug as he walked across to her. ‘It might need a quick blast in the microwave though.’

‘She’s spark out,’ Mark said wearily. ‘I could use one though.’

‘Not this.’ Jade swept up the mug, tipping the contents down the sink before he had chance to reach for it. ‘Sorry. It’s got loads of sugar in and I know you don’t take it.’

Mark furrowed his brow. Since when did Mel start taking sugar?

‘She thought it might help with her energy levels,’ Jade said, though he hadn’t asked. ‘I’ll make you another.’

Ah. Made sense, Mark supposed. As much as anything made sense tonight. ‘No need. Thanks, Jade, but I think I might have a nightcap instead.’ He shouldn’t, but, frankly, he needed something stronger than tea. ‘Don’t suppose you fancy joining me while you have your tea, do you?’ he asked, noting her mug, which was still half full.

Jade hesitated for a second. ‘I’d love to,’ she said. ‘Evie’s due to wake soon anyway. There’s not much point going to bed.’

‘No.’ Mark guessed she wouldn’t be getting a great deal of sleep tonight either. ‘Sorry about all of this, Jade. Mel doesn’t make a habit of drinking. She has the odd glass of wine, but… Well, there’s a bit more to it, to be honest.’