Straight Up Love (The Boys of Jackson Harbor #2)(55)
I grimace. “I always thought you two had such a great relationship. Actually, I was . . . I was always kind of jealous, because he seemed to love you so much more than me.”
Her eyes go wide. “Are you kidding? I could never measure up to his sweet Ava. You were reliable and thoughtful, and most importantly, you didn’t spread your legs for every guy who came around.”
“He said that?”
“Almost verbatim.” She draws in a long breath and exhales slowly. “Anyway, it was a relief not to have to deal with that so much this trip, and with any luck, before I come home again next time, Mom will wake up and leave his drunk ass.”
Maybe it makes me a disloyal daughter, but I hope she’s right. Jill deserves better. “Next time being in another five years or so?”
Laughing, she shrugs. “Maybe. What’s here for me?” She crosses the kitchen and wraps me in a hug. “Thanks again. Good luck with the whole pregnancy thing.”
I give her a quick squeeze and then step back. “Be honest. Do you think I’m crazy?”
“For using your best friend to get a baby you plan to raise on your own? Yeah. I think you’re nuts.” Her expression softens. “But you’re steady, reliable Ava. I’m sure you’ve thought this through.”
“I have. I really have.”
She hoists her purse onto her shoulder. “See? It doesn’t matter what I think.”
I swallow hard. She’s right. It doesn’t matter, but it would feel nice to have a couple more people on my team. “Do you need a ride to the airport?”
“No, I’m going to call Mom and have her drive me. She’ll want a little time with me anyway.”
“Good luck with the new job and everything. Can I call you when Jake and I are in the city this summer?”
She beams. “I’d love that.”
She goes to the guest bedroom to pack, and I feel like I’ve made some steps toward building a relationship with my sister.
Ava
I’ve never been very into motocross aside from being excited every time Colton makes it through another race uninjured, but when I do go to the races, I always have a good time. Today was no different. Ellie, Jake, and I stood by the winding dirt track, drinking beer and cheering our heads off. The nerves I felt while packing my bags this morning fizzled the second the race started, and now I’m warm from the sun and lazy from the beer.
When Jake and I get into our room, I collapse on the bed, bone-deep exhausted but happy. There’s nothing like a day with your best friends to feed your soul.
“You had fun?” Jake asks.
“Yes.” I stretch my arms overhead and arch my back. The last few weeks of the school year are always hectic, but there’s an extra layer of tension around Windsor Prep as everyone waits to find out who’s going to lose their job. I needed to unwind. “Does it always feel this good to take time off work? Because I think I’ve been missing out.”
He chuckles. “That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you.” He leans against the wall and watches me as if he’s waiting for me to say something or do something. I feel that old sexual awkwardness creep in. I’m sharing a room with Jake, and we’re supposed to make a baby.
Things were never awkward between us before, but now I’ve confused everything, and he has too, dammit. I just thought we’d have sex—compartmentalize the baby-making and the friendship, keeping them separate. He’s the one who’s muddied the two, and my old feelings refuse to stay buried where they belong.
Maybe I should have expected that, but it’s not what I was asking for, and it scares me more than a little.
I kept myself busy all week so I didn’t have a chance to think too much about spending Saturday night in a hotel with Jake. Monday, I met with Lilly to help with the audition piece she’s already nailed, then Tuesday I had the children’s theater board meeting. I caught up on grading on Wednesday and worked at Jackson Brews on Thursday and Friday.
I hoped my shifts would include a repeat of Jake pinning me against the cooler, maybe some of that knuckle foreplay he’s so good at, or even him giving me a preview of what was to come this weekend. Instead, he was scarce, and I barely talked to him all week other than to confirm our travel plans. But now we’re here, and I’m nervous and greedy for what happens next for reasons that have very little to do with the baby I want.
“Wanna order a pizza tonight or go out?” I ask, more to have something to say than because I’m hungry. We’re supposed to meet Ellie, Colton, Levi, and some chick Levi’s seeing at the club across the street at ten, but suddenly, the five hours between now and then seem to stretch too wide. They’re too filled with possibility.
“Let’s go out,” he says. “I can make reservations.”
“What about that tapas restaurant down the block?”
He already has his phone out, tapping the screen. “Got it.” He slides his phone back into his pocket. “I made a reservation for six. Wanna shower or anything?”
“That’s probably a good idea. I must stink from a day at the track.” I roll to sitting. Climbing off the bed feels like it requires way more effort than it should. I’m either going to need a cup of coffee or a nap if we’re staying out late with everyone tonight. I’m out of energy.