Straight Up Love (The Boys of Jackson Harbor #2)(16)

I don’t know what they all think they know, but I do know I’m not in the mood to have my brothers laugh at my expense.

I push past Brayden and into the kitchen, which is packed with my siblings, Ethan’s girlfriend, Nic, and my niece. Sure enough, Carter and Levi laugh when they see me. Even Ethan smirks.

“Big night for you Friday, huh, Daddy?” Levi asks on a chuckle. “You could have told me the whole story when I saw you at the gym yesterday.”

“They’re being jerks,” Nic growls at my side. She’s as sweet as she is beautiful, and when I turn to her, she’s worrying her bottom lip between her teeth as if this is all somehow her fault.

“What the fuck are they talking about?”

“I told Ethan that Ava was going to ask you for . . . you know, your sperm. I thought that was what she was doing when she left us Friday, and then you two disappeared up into your apartment.” She shoots a scowl in Ethan’s direction. “I promise I wouldn’t have said anything if I knew he was going to tell your brothers.”

Ethan bites back a smile. “How was I supposed to keep that to myself? We should all be celebrating. Jake and Ava, finally together.”

My gut clenches. “Except we’re not together.”

The smiles fall off my brothers’ faces. I feel like a fool. I know that my feelings for my best friend aren’t a secret among my family members, but my brothers have always done me the courtesy of not speaking of it unless absolutely necessary. Having them in here talking about my relationship—or lack thereof—with Ava makes me feel exposed, and I fucking hate it. “Not even a little.”

“What were you doing up there?” Nic asks softly.

“She told me she was having a baby.” I speak quietly so only Nic can hear, but everyone else is loudly speculating about the future of “Jayva,” as Shay calls Ava and me. I’m already weary of this conversation and not in the mood to explain myself to everyone. “When she said she wanted my help, I thought she was saying that she was pregnant and wanted me to help her as a new mom—not with making her into one.”

Nic shoots Ethan another dirty look. “It’s not what you guys think,” she snaps. “Now stop.”

“Jake’s a big boy,” Levi says. “He doesn’t need you protecting him, Nic.” He grabs a spoon and piles hash brown casserole on his plate.

Shay sits quietly in the corner, sipping her coffee and watching me, making her and Brayden the only two of my five siblings not laughing at me. I make a mental note to get them both extra-nice gifts next Christmas.

We fill our plates and head to the dining room. I can’t help but watch Nic with Lilly, my six-year-old niece. They’re all smiles when they’re together, and as much as I’m sure that Ethan and Nic were meant to be together, the real soul mates here are Nic and Lilly.

Longing unravels old dreams from where they’re coiled in my chest. I can’t deny I had a bit of a crush on Nic when she first came to town. She’s gorgeous and fits into our family as if she’s always been a part of it. I think each of the Jackson boys had a thing for her, though Levi was the most vocal about it until Ethan put a stop to it. But it’s not any specific feelings for Nic that have this tugging in my chest. I want what they have.

I’m gonna have to beat Ethan’s ass if he doesn’t put a ring on that finger soon, but I’m pretty sure I won’t have to. Ethan’s smart enough to know what he’s got. He almost lost her once. He won’t let that happen again.

I pull out a chair at the table, and Shay takes the seat beside me. She’s actually eating today, which is a rare sight, though her plate of wheat toast and scrambled eggs has nothing on the thousand-plus-calorie breakfasts my brothers and I are about to inhale. Ever since Shay lost the weight she put on in undergrad, she’s been very careful about her diet.

“Where’s Mom?” I ask, looking around. The table is crowded with us six Jackson siblings, Nic, and my niece, but crowded around it as we are, the sight of Mom’s unoccupied chair makes it feel empty. I spoke with her on the phone last night when I called to congratulate her on finishing the last of this round of treatments, but I was looking forward to seeing her today.

“She’s napping upstairs,” Brayden says. “She’s having a rough day.”

Shit. Poor Mom.

“Poor Nana,” Lilly says, her small face pulling into a frown. “She feels pukey.”

“Why didn’t she stay home?” I ask.

“You know Mom,” Shay says. “Doesn’t want to miss Sunday brunch, even if she can’t stomach the smell of it.”

I nod. I do know, and there’s a sharp pang in my chest at the thought of her having to miss every Sunday brunch if this cancer gets the better of her. I fucking hate feeling this helpless. I want to fix it. To find a way to fight it for her so she doesn’t have to.

“Sorry I wasn’t there Friday,” Shay says quietly. “Maybe I could have shut Teagan up before she told drunk Ava to ask for your sperm.”

“So I have Teagan to thank for this?”

Shay pushes her eggs around her plate. “That’s what Nic said.”

I shrug. “It’s not a big deal. She woke up sober and knew it was a bad idea.”

She nods. “But is it a bad idea?”