Silver Tears(75)

He fidgeted. Through his tracksuit bottoms, I could see his penis swelling. He noticed that I had spotted it and seemed embarrassed.

“It’s okay,” I said.

I reached out with my hand and placed it clumsily onto his crotch. I felt vomit rising into my mouth but I quickly swallowed it.

He moved on the bed.

“I need the bathroom,” he said.

I nodded.

“I’ll wait here.”





Faye walked through the forest naked. Behind her, the house was in flames. She had thrown her clothes into the fire—they would be destroyed together with Jack.

The orange flames licked up into the night sky, the smoke climbing high.

She didn’t turn around, she just kept going, away from Jack. She was filled with a newly won and strong sense of freedom—it possessed her body.

The car headlights illuminated the narrow forest track at exactly the spot where she and Ylva had agreed to meet. Her friend had been close by all along and had been instructed to drive to the meeting point as soon as she saw smoke rising from the house. And just as promised, she was there.

Ylva smiled faintly at her from behind the wheel. Faye opened the passenger door without any expression. The car was red, old, freckled with rust, and had no GPS. Ylva had borrowed it from a guy she knew, no questions asked. He wasn’t the sort to talk to the police. No one would be able to prove they had been here.

“Is it done?” Ylva asked.

“It’s done.”

Ylva nodded and reached into the backseat. She passed over a black bag containing clothes. A clean set. No trace of Jack.

“Do you want to get dressed before we go?”

Faye shook her head and climbed into the passenger seat with the bag on her lap. The smell of smoke was beginning to fill the inside of the car and Ylva coughed.



“No, just drive.”

Faye saw the inferno in the house between the tree trunks at the very moment that the roof caved inward with a crash. Ylva, who had been about to start the engine, froze and slowly lowered her hand.

They sat in silence for a while as they watched the old house burn. Then Ylva put the car into gear and they slowly rolled forward.

“What do you feel?” she asked.

Faye thought about this for a bit.

“Nothing, actually. You?”

Ylva swallowed, then looked at Faye.

“The same.”

When they reached the highway, they passed four fire engines going the other way at high speed, their sirens blaring.





The morning sun shone through the window of Alice’s guest room. It illuminated Ylva, who was holding Nora in her arms. The little girl had just woken up and was rubbing her eyes sleepily.

“Are you okay?” Faye asked, putting her head around the door. She had spent the night wide awake on one of Alice’s sofas.

She looked searchingly at Ylva.

“I’m okay,” Ylva said, but her words and tone were contradicted by her viselike grip on Nora.

“We did what we had to do.”

“Yes, I know,” said Ylva.

She buried her nose in Nora’s hair and closed her eyes. Her daughter’s chubby little arms were wrapped tightly around her neck.

Alice came into the room, looked at them, and smiled.

“Breakfast is served.”

When they had returned home during the night, Faye had told Alice everything. That hadn’t been easy either. Naturally Alice had been very shocked.

Faye’s phone rang and she hit the green button when she saw who it was.

“Hi, sweetheart,” she said when Julienne’s face filled the small display. “I can’t talk right now, I’ll call you later. But I’ll be home soon. I promise. Really, really soon. Kiss kiss! Love you!”

“Okay, Mommy, bye!”

She hung up.



“Does she miss you?” said Ylva. Nora blinked her eyes slowly. She was at the point of falling asleep again in Ylva’s arms.

“Yes,” Faye said briefly.

She didn’t feel up to talking about Julienne right now. Jack was gone. Forever. And no matter how much she had hated him, how much she realized that there had been no place for him in Julienne’s life, she was still grieving. For the fact that Julienne would go through life without a dad.

The guilt was a heavy burden on her shoulders. Not because she had killed him, but because she had picked so poorly. But without Jack she would never have had Julienne. It was a mental equation she found hard to balance. She just wished she still had that picture in the plastic wallet. It had been her talisman, giving her strength and reminding her of what was important. But it was gone, just like Jack.

“What’s the next step?” Alice said.

She looked strong and decisive.

Faye looked at Nora, at her soft eyelids and her long eyelashes.

She was so similar to Jack sometimes.

“We need to use the video and photo evidence. It’s time for Ylva’s plan B.”

Alice smiled.

“You mean we’re going to turn the screws on Eyvind?”

“Yes, we need those papers from the Patent and Registration Office.”

“It needs to be the right papers and they have to be worded the right way,” Ylva said, cradling Nora in her arms. “I’ve done a spec of exactly what we need.”