Shipped(75)

“I’ve been a bad sister.” My voice cracks. Walsh shakes her head, but I nod, my lips straining to form words through the tears. “No, I have. I’m so sorry I haven’t been there for you, Walsh. That’s going to change, okay? We’re family, and there’s nothing more important than family. I’m going to do better. I promise.”

Wrapping her arm around me, she leans her head on my shoulder. “You already are.”





25




The final morning of the cruise dawns as stark and heavy as a hangover.

Clouds blanket the sky as we disembark on Bartolomé, the youngest island in the archipelago and nothing more than a lifeless spit of rock. Walsh walks beside me as we climb the 372 wooden stairs leading to the top of the island.

The skin under her eyes is purplish-blue from our late-night heart-to-heart, but there’s a lightness to her that wasn’t there before.

There’s hope.

Too bad any hope for my own love life has extinguished like a bottle rocket. Three flights in front of us, Graeme climbs, his stride sure and even. My heart thunders, and not just from exertion.

“Talk to him,” says Walsh. She wouldn’t let me go to sleep last night until I filled her in on what happened with Graeme, so she’s up to speed.

Pulling up short on a platform, I walk to the edge and grip the wooden railing. Below me, a tumble of red and black volcanic rocks leads to the sea. “It’s over. I pretty much carpet-bombed any chance we had of being together.”

“I have a hard time believing that.”

“Believe it. I’ve been so caught up with this promotion that I completely lost sight of everything else. Maybe I should drop out. Withdraw my name from the running. I need to focus on you right now.”

Walsh grabs me by the forearm and whirls me around to look at her. “Don’t you dare. You’re Henley Fucking Evans. When the going gets tough, you pack that mother with TNT and raze it to the ground. Obstacles? No such thing.”

“I need to be there for you.”

“Hen, I’m not your responsibility. I appreciate you wanting to help me, and honestly right now I’ll take all the help I can get. But you shouldn’t give up everything for me. I won’t let you. First step? Talk to that man. I’ve never seen you so happy as when you’re with him. You practically glow. If you’re in the wrong, apologize. Make it better.”

Walsh is right. I owe Graeme an apology. It’s the right thing to do—even if it doesn’t change a damn thing.

Please let it change things. Graeme has turned out to be the most thoughtful, kind, supportive man I’ve ever met, and I threw him out of my life like garbage. My gut seizes and I force down a sudden swell of nausea.

I like him so much it scares me.

But then there’s Walsh… and the promotion…

How can I choose? Do I have to choose? Can I really be there to support Walsh, give my career my all, and somehow be with the man of my dreams?

It doesn’t seem possible. Especially after last night.

I swallow hard. I have to at least try to make things right with Graeme, even if it’s too late. I owe it to him, and I owe it to myself.

With a stiff breeze pushing tendrils of hair from my face, I climb the final flight of steps to the dirt incline leading to the top of the island. Taking a deep breath, I shuffle over to stand next to Graeme. Wind whips my cheeks and I tuck a stray lock of hair behind my ear.

“Hey,” I say, wiping my sweaty palms on my hiking shorts.

He doesn’t look at me. “Hey.”

“The view up here is really something,” I say lamely. An untold expanse of ocean embraces the rolling green hills of neighboring Santiago Island, spreading out before us.

He cuts me a sideways look as he raises his camera.

I deflate. “Okay, scratch the small talk. I’m sorry—for what I said last night and how I acted. You didn’t deserve any of that.”

Nostrils flaring, he nods once. His camera clicks.

“The truth is… I don’t know what I want right now. I learned something last night, after you left…” I steal a glance at Walsh, who’s pointedly not looking our way. She’s leaning against the railing on the stairs, gazing out at the view.

“It made me realize something. You were right about me. I am scared—of everything. I’m scared I’ll lose this promotion, and I’m scared of what will happen if I don’t. I’m scared of trying new things and of failure. I need to make some changes in my life. Big changes.”

Something skitters under the railing to my left. It’s a little black lizard with a splotch of red on its muzzle. Apparently, the island isn’t devoid of life after all.

I swallow the dry lump coalescing in my throat. Graeme still won’t look at me. “I—I understand if you don’t want anything to do with me. I wouldn’t either, if I were you…”

Graeme’s shoulders stiffen. Behind his camera, his face is an impassive mask.

Heart crumbling into dust, I rest my hand on his forearm. “So I just want to say thank you. For everything. No matter what happens with the promotion or us or any of it, know that I’ll always cherish this time with you. You are the kindest, most caring man I’ve ever had the privilege to know. Your resilience inspires me. I’m in awe of you.”