Ship It(19)

Yes! This is the kind of question I came to hear. Sing to me of SmokeHeart, O Muse, sing.

“Forest, you wanna take this one?” Rico says. Forest looks a bit unsteady. He hasn’t spoken much so far.

“Um, sure,” he says. Then he pauses before continuing slowly. “When I played that scene, I was actually thinking that Smokey was talking about literally finding a home in this world. His apartment in town. His place to hang his hat.”

That is not my interpretation of that line.

Forest adds, “You know, Smokey’s a pretty independent guy. He doesn’t really need anyone else.”

And I can’t really explain it other than what he said is so wrong it’s absurd and that part of me that loves Smokey down to my bones knows that. Smokey doesn’t need anyone else?

“BULLSHIT.”

The adrenaline hits my system as I realize that I just said that. Out loud. And loudly.

As eyes turn toward me, I feel my blood thump in my ears, and I wonder what the hell I did that for. To my horror, I see Forest squint into the bright lights and find my eyes.

I’m making eye contact with Forest Reed. Not through a computer screen, but in real life. It’s a little too real. I came here to look at my favorite actor, not have him look at me.

But Forest Reed is looking at me. And he’s frowning.

“Did you have something to add?” he asks sarcastically.

I look around wildly. A few rows up, Tess is staring at me. Everyone is staring at me. More than a few phones are pointed at me. My palms start to sweat. I wipe them on my jeans. I remember what my mom said. This is my chance to tell them what I really think. I should take it.

“Yeah, actually.” I stand up.

A volunteer runs over to me. “Say your name and ask your question,” she whispers and puts a microphone in my hand. It’s heavy and holding it feels like power. I take a deep breath, look somewhere above Forest’s head, and pretend I’m just telling my mom what I think about Smokey and Heart, not Forest freaking Reed.

“My name is Claire Strupke, and of course Smokey needs other people. Everyone does. You can’t go through life alone, it’s not healthy,” I say. “Smokey’s whole problem is he doesn’t realize how lonely he really is, until he meets Heart.”

I notice Rico nodding along. Forest seems to be actually thinking about what I said. Is he considering my interpretation of his character? What is even happening? When I woke up this morning, the last thing I thought I’d be doing today is talking to Forest Reed. What?

The chick in the wild floral blazer comes up the aisle and takes my photo. She does it too fast for me to be nervous about how I look. I straighten my hair and push up my glasses, but it’s too late. Whatever it’s for, I’m sure I look like a freak. Then she winks at me and blows a giant pink bubble with her gum as she types on her phone.

Jamie smiles politely. “Thanks for that, thank you,” he says. And as I look at him, I realize I’m not done. I can’t be.

I steel myself. “I… Actually, Jamie, I have a question for you.”

“Oh.” Jamie exchanges a look with the volunteer standing next to me, who reaches for my mic, but I draw away from her, closing my fingers over its cold metal even tighter. I have a question and I have this microphone and I’m not going to sit back down until I’ve asked it.

“You’ve built this really strong relationship between Smokey and Heart,” I say, and the volunteer steps away, unsure what to do now that I’ve seized control. “They presumably hate each other, but they’re also kind of obsessed with each other.”

Jamie narrows his eyes, but I can’t stop. I have to know if my idea of Smokey and Heart is what the show intends; I have to know if what I feel about them is real.

“Some people would even suggest…” I say, my lips close to the microphone. “Some people would even suggest that Smokey and Heart…” I can feel Tess’s eyes on me from three rows up. She wants to know, too. We all want to know.

“Are they in love with each other?”

Dead silence.

I continue, “I think they are. So I guess my question is, are they going to realize they’re in love with each other by the end of this season…and kiss?”

There’s a collective holding of breath as all the eyes and phones in the room turn to Jamie, and I swear to god my heart simply stops beating for a second while I wait. Jamie looks at me with a completely neutral expression that I can’t read, as he probably deliberates what to say next, but already the pause has gone on too long. Was this a big mistake?

Jamie is raising the microphone when another voice interrupts him.

“You think Smokey is gay… for Heart?” Forest asks slowly, like I’m an idiot. He’s smirking at me. Smirking.

His accusation just hangs in the air.

“Forest—” Rico starts, and Forest shoots him a look.

“Obviously they have a strong connection…” Jamie says diplomatically, finally finding his voice.

“Yeah, but not that kind of connection.” Forest talks over him.

“We’ll see their conflict play out in the coming episodes,” Jamie says.

“No disrespect to people who are, but Smokey definitely isn’t,” says Forest.

“You’ll have to keep watching if you want to see more,” says Jamie.