Run To Me (Lazarus Rising #4)(21)

“You told her!” Reva charged, and then she was racing toward Jay. Her hand flew out and she slapped him with all of her might. “You sonofabitch! How could you?”

He hadn’t told Willow a damn thing, but he wasn’t going to admit that to Reva. If he did, then Reva would know Willow’s secret. That couldn’t happen. Reva would sell any story for the right amount of money. And there would be a whole lot of money offered if the truth about Willow made it into the public eye.

Reva drew back her hand to hit him again, but West caught her wrist. “Easy…”

She jerked away from him. “Don’t you ‘easy’ me, West Harper! You knew, too, didn’t you? What, were you both laughing at me? Making fun of me? Oh, there goes Reva…pretending she’s so high class. Pretending she’s something she’s not, pretending—”

“We all pretend sometimes, Reva.” Jay kept his voice gentle. “Nothing wrong with that.” His gaze remained on her. “And there’s nothing wrong with having a rough start, with overcoming it. With making something of yourself when you’ve been through a nightmare. If anything, it’s a success to be proud of. Not something to hide.”

Reva’s eyes glittered with tears. “I should have known. You research everyone. Anyone who gets close to you. But…I changed my name, got a new life, paid for that life, so I thought I was safe, I thought—”

“You are safe. No one outside of this room ever needs to know about your past.”

Her furious glare flew to Willow. “You told your lover, your current screw. You’ll tell the next one! You’ll tell—“

“He didn’t tell me,” Willow cut in.

Shit. Jay opened his mouth, trying to get a ready lie in place.

“She’s on my payroll,” West threw out before Jay could speak. “And has top clearance. She has access to my files and while we’re trying to figure out who is after Jay, I filled her in about you. There’s no one else on the team who ever needs to know.”

Some of the tension left Reva’s shoulders. She blinked her eyes a few times and then focused on Jay. “You knew all along?”

He had.

“It…didn’t matter?”

No, it hadn’t mattered. He didn’t care about her past.

But Reva was already shaking her head. “Maybe it did matter. Maybe that’s why you didn’t stay, maybe it’s the reason you walked away.”

Jay stepped forward and caught her hands. Held her tight. “I walked away because you wanted what I couldn’t give.”

“Commitment. Marriage.” A fine tension held her body in its grip.

Sadly, he shook his head. “No, Reva, you wanted my money. You loved it, and not me.”

Her lips parted, but she didn’t speak.

“You want security, and there’s nothing wrong with that. But I want more. I want a woman who’d love me the same if I didn’t have a dollar to my name. Because you see, Reva, once, I didn’t. I had nothing. So I’d never judge you, and I wouldn’t want you to judge me. But I’ll be damned if I spend my life with someone who doesn’t love me. So I walked away. And I’m going to keep walking.”

A tear rolled down her cheek. “Until you find someone who loves you?”

He wasn’t so sure that would happen. Not at the rate he kept screwing up.

But Reva was peering around his body. “She’s not the one.” Her voice was raspy. “She’s not going to love you, Jay.”

No, Willow probably wasn’t. “I think you should go home, Reva.”

She backed away from him. Her hands swiped over her cheeks, and it was like a veil swept over her features. Not a veil, but maybe a mask. She always tried to hide her real self. “Why?” Reva demanded. “The night is young. Maybe you’re off my list now, but it doesn’t mean I’m done.” She turned on her heel. Marched out with the grace of a queen. No one spoke until she was gone.

West inclined his head toward Jay. “I think it’s time for us to get our asses out of the ladies’ room.”

Leave it to West. Jay’s lips quirked as some of the tension finally broke. “Right. Well, I guess we can mark Reva off our list, too.”

“Yeah.” West exhaled. “And I’ll go find Sawyer. See if he’s turned up anything. So far, this night feels like a bust.” Then West was exiting, too.

Jay squared his shoulders and turned back to Willow. There were dark shadows under her eyes, and she was gazing at him in confusion. He lifted his hand toward her. “Hate to say it, sweetheart, but there’s gonna be even more stories about us circulating tomorrow. I’m sure plenty of folks saw me kick in the bathroom door.” And he was also sure that Benjamin had made sure no one followed them inside. But it was time to leave.

She crept closer, but didn’t take his hand. “I didn’t mean to see her fears. She’s just a really strong projector.”

He nodded and kept his hand extended to her.

“I didn’t make her see those fears, though.” Her words came quickly. “I didn’t do that.”

“I know.” Again, his tone was soft.

Willow licked her lips. “She’s not what I thought. On the inside. I never expected—”