Pucked Love (Pucked, #6)(16)

I’m independent, and so is he. I have my little house, and he has his big house. Hell, we haven’t even met each other’s parents. Until now it wasn’t something I worried about.

With the expansion draft looming and the possibility that Darren could end up traded, I feel uncertain about everything. I don’t want to lose him, but I don’t want to lose anyone else either, or my job and my independence. It’s been easy up until now, and suddenly it isn’t anymore.

Even Poppy, the newest addition to our group, knows that no matter what, she’s going where Lance goes. It’s secured in the diamond she wears on her ring finger. Lily and Randy might not follow the wedding-and-babies path, but they live together, too, and they have a dog together, which is almost like having a kid. All I have is the pearl necklace Darren had restrung for me, and no real certainty that he’d want me to come with him. Or whether I’d be able to leave all of the other people I love behind for him.





I feel off kilter when I get home, listless and uncertain. While all the other girls had messages from their boyfriends or husbands this afternoon, I had silence from Darren. Normally it wouldn’t be an issue, but with what happened last night and the discussion about the expansion draft, I’m feeling less than secure, which is not like me.

The reason Darren and I work so well is partly because he’s never pushed to get serious. He seems content to keep doing what we’re doing. Which is fine with me—or at least it was.

I drop my purse on the kitchen counter and scrub a hand over my face. I need something sweet. Well, what I really need is Darren and an orgasm. But since I saw him last night, that’s not an option unless I want to look clingy—which is something I pride myself on not being—so I’ll have to settle for hot chocolate.

I fill my milk frother, because I’m not ruining nice hot chocolate by using boiled water, and pick one of the gourmet tins my mom likes to send me. Every month I get a care package from her. Mostly it’s herbal stuff likes teas and candles and creams for endless youth, but she also likes to send me whatever new sex toy she’s found at whatever Dominatrix conference she’s attended recently. She means well, but it’s awkward.

I check the tin with the candies my mom sends me and frown. My supply is dwindling, which is yet another thing to worry about. I haven’t been this anxious since . . . well, since we left The Ranch. I tap on the counter, waiting for the milk to froth. I could maybe try giving myself an orgasm to take the edge off, but I’m not sure that’s going to be helpful.

I’ve just poured the frothy milk into my mug when my phone buzzes on the counter. I snatch it up, but my smile fades as Mom flashes across the screen. I feel bad for being disappointed, but I’d hoped Darren might check in. I put a pin in my disappointment because it’s nice to hear from my mom. She keeps busy, so sometimes it’s difficult to find time to catch up.

“Hi, Mom.”

“Char-char, how’s my baby girl?”

“I’m good.” I prop the phone on my shoulder, dump a handful of marshmallows into my hot chocolate, and head for the living room. “How are you?”

“Fantastic. Just wonderful! I can’t talk long because I’m in between clients, but I wanted to let you know I’ll be in town next week.”

I sit up straighter, fingers of unease raking down my spine and slithering lower. It’s such an uncomfortable feeling, especially when I’m talking to my mom. “In Chicago? When?”

“Probably not until later in the week. I’ll know more soon, but I want to spend some time with you! I haven’t seen my baby in almost a year, and I miss you. Oh! And I have some new fun things for you, too! Early birthday presents and such. You’ll be around? I know sometimes you travel for work.”

I hold in my sigh of relief. Darren leaves for the first two away games of the playoffs in a couple of days, so I don’t have to worry about my mom being in town at the same time he is. So far I’ve been lucky that her infrequent visits have coincided nicely with his away games.

Also, I don’t actually travel for work, but sometimes I go to away games with Violet when they’re on the weekends or we can get a day off, especially on the long stretches when the guys are gone for more than a week. It’s nice to break up the separation a little. I don’t talk to my mom about relationships since she’s very much against them. She hasn’t had a real boyfriend since we left The Ranch, and that was over a decade ago.

“That would be great. What’s in Chicago, other than me?” My mom wouldn’t just come for the sake of visiting me. It’s not that she doesn’t love me—she does—but her life is . . . strange. She doesn’t stay in the same place for long, moving around the country and refusing to set down any roots. She’s not designed for parenting, something I learned once we left The Ranch. She’s really good at a few things: getaways, making candies, and being a career Dominatrix.

“I have a work conference. It should be a lot of fun. Oh! My five o’clock is here! I’ll call you when I’m in town.”

“Okay. Oh, and Mom?”

“Yes, Char-char?”

“Can you bring me more candies? I’m almost out.”

“Of course, honey. I’ll bring lots.”

I end the call and flop back on the couch. It’s close to dinnertime, but I don’t feel like making anything. I wonder what Darren’s doing now. For the first time ever, I consider what it would be like to have someone to come home to, how I might like to curl up in that reading chair in Darren’s living room and wait for him to walk through the door.