Not Your Villain (Sidekick Squad #2)(53)

“What about you?” His dad turns the question back to him, patient and easy, as if he knew Bells wasn’t ready to lead with it.

Bells’ voice quavers. It tumbles out of him, first in bits and pieces, then every feeling he’s kept bottled up rushes forward: his loneliness, his aching worry, his guilt about focusing on his feelings because they’ve got bigger things to do.

“Hey,” Nick says. “You’re going to be fine. All of this? It is important. You are important. And your friends haven’t forgotten you.”

“Thanks, Dad.”

“I love you, okay? I gotta go, but remember that, and your friends love you too.”

He says goodbye, feeling a bit better. He stands up and brushes dirt off himself. Bells looks at the mountains and turns around. He can retrace his steps. It’ll be a long run back, but he can do it.

His DED chirps again.

From: Jess 7:39 pm

hey, can you come over to my house?

To: Jess 7:39pm





ARE YOU OKAY


From: Jess 7:40pm

yeah, i’m good. just wanted to hang out with you. you seemed really down at dinner <3 <3 <3

Bells types out a YES, OKAY, and sends it with a smile.

Jess welcomes him into the Trans’ home. “Hey, I’ve got pizza, your favorite, with three cheeses!”

“Awesome,” Bells says.

“Hey, this is for you!” Brendan offers Bells a box of chocolates and gives him a shy smile, then runs away.

“Thanks!” Bells calls after him as Brendan disappears into his room.

Jess laughs and gestures for him to follow her downstairs.

Abby, already halfway through a slice, waves at him from the couch. She pushes a plate with three slices at Bells, who promptly digs in.

Jess flops on the floor as her MonRobot buzzes around her, cheeping at Bells. Abby’s custom MonRobots—Jacks and Jills—whir around on the carpet.

“Is Ch? trying to vacuum my hair?” Jess asks tonelessly.

The little round robot is, indeed, shuffling over to Jess and making its whirr whirr noise. Bells gently picks it up and turns it around, and Ch? meeps at him, then makes a surprised beep when Jills bumps into him.

“Do they know they’re playing tag?” Bells asks, amused.

“I’m not sure,” Abby says. “They know they’re playing a game. At least they’re entertained.” She waves her pizza slice at Bells. “Does your family have a MonRobot?”

Bells nods. “Yeah, but the house cleaning model is incredibly old, a 2116 model. We keep our newer ones at the restaurant.”

“Aw, that wasn’t a good year,” Abby says. “A lot of the tech that year was pretty weird. But it still works, right?”

“Of course,” Bells says. “I don’t think it’s as smart as these, though.”

Ch? is zooming around in a circle.

“Smart,” Jess repeats, laughing.

Bells practically inhales the three slices on his plate; he didn’t realize he was so hungry. Jess and Abby draw him into conversation about school, about his brothers, the restaurant. It’s fun, even if a little different, and he knows they, too, can feel the gaps in the conversation where Emma would have fit in seamlessly.

He pushes his empty plate away, rolls over on the floor, and listens to the MonRobots beeping at each other. He opens one eye; they’re fighting over vacuuming up a piece of cheese.

“So, uh, do you wanna talk about it?” Jess asks. “It’s okay if you don’t. I mean, I like Carlos, but…”

“He’s great,” Bells says listlessly.

“I thought you already told her; or were going to really soon,” Jess says quietly.

“You know, it’s a lot harder than it sounds!” Bells protests. “I couldn’t just… and now I definitely can’t—”

Abby chuckles. “Why not?”

“It isn’t funny,” Bells says. “It’s not that easy! Just to tell someone how you feel about them! It’s not the same… You and Jess had it so easy; she just up and asked you out.”

Abby throws her head back and laughs. “Really? That’s what she said? Okay, she did try to; it was adorable.”

“Hey!” Jess makes a face.

Abby gives her a quick kiss. “But I’m pretty sure I’d been dropping hints forever before that, and she kind of… trailed off during the asking, so I’m not sure if that counts.”

“Look, I don’t think it would be right for me to tell Emma how I feel now. She’s very happy with Carlos. I can’t just tell her I love her. It would put her in a terrible position.” Bells groans. “If you were me? What would you do?”

“I don’t think I would have let it get to this point,” Abby says. “When I’m interested in someone, I let them know.”

“I just want to stop feeling like this.”

“Can you write it down?” Jess asks.

Bells sits up. “What?”

“Write her a message. Type it up, save it, don’t send it. Just… get it out so those feelings aren’t rattling around inside of you anymore.”

Abby nods. “Jess writes all the time. She puts down feelings and stuff in journals. When I was struggling with losing my powers, writing down my thoughts helped a lot.”