Nate(40)

I wanted to kiss him.

No.

I was weaving on my feet, but I grabbed the doorframe. My fingers sank in. I had Nova in my arms.

I steadied myself, and I took a beat, just as he had.

He was right. All of it.

I closed my eyes, feeling everything in me swirling and spinning.

He was right about everything.

“What do I need to do?”

His eyes fell to my lips, darkening. Then he folded his arms over his chest, and his eyes lifted back to mine. “You need allies from your past to rally around you.”

My mouth dried again because I knew who he was talking about.

“No,” I whispered, a clammy fear starting to crawl up my legs.

“Yes.”

“I can’t.”

He grated out, “You have to.”

I looked, but his eyes weren’t on me. They were on Nova.

“You know who it’s really for. Neither of us has an option here.”

Right.

Right!

Nova.

I sighed. Are you sure you meant me, Valerie?

“I’ll call my mother tonight.”

He jerked his head in a nod. “Quincey?”

I’d been about to take Nova back to her room. She was starting to squirm in my arms. “Yeah?”

“I’d like to hear more about you, about anything, if you’re willing to share again?”

A rush of pleasure and warmth pushed out the fear.

I nodded. “I’d like that.”

I meant that, and that surprised me. I didn’t share, and it was something I usually had to force myself to do, but with Nate, I wanted to share. I wanted him to know everything about me.

That should’ve alarmed me.

Nova whacked me across the face with one of her bottles. A distinct smell started to permeate the room as well, and I grinned.

I was thinking I needed to be more alarmed about Nova’s gift for me instead.





24





Nate





Four nights later





“We should’ve brought Nova.”

I threw Quincey a look because she’d been the one to suggest we use Emily for the night.

“You said she’d be a distraction.”

“Exactly.” Her lips were thinned. We were in my SUV, heading to Graham’s house for a family “reunion” dinner, and what I said was correct. Quincey had been torn whether Nova should come or not. She went back and forth until saying what I just responded to her with, which was correct. Nova would be a distraction. Everyone loved Nova, and the dinner talk we needed to have would not be kid-appropriate. Nova might not understand, but kids sensed everything.

After her confession, Quincey relaxed around me.

The night and immediate day after I pushed her about reaching out to her family, she’d been tense the whole time. She’d been wound up like a sober virgin at a sex club. There was an intense dancing session in the studio—aka the pool house—and when I say intense, it was intense. She didn’t know this, but most nights she went in there, Nova and I curled up in the back of the pool house to watch her.

She was beautiful to watch.

There were no other words to describe her movements.

I did my homework, so I saw recordings of some of her previous performances. I knew she was talented, but watching her live and in person was almost a religious experience. There was a reason Nova never moved out of my lap or made a sound. We both knew that when Quincey danced, we were watching magic happen. She was special—special in a way that she didn’t seem like she was from this world kind of beautiful special.

I could better articulate myself, but with her, sometimes the words weren’t there.

That night, though, it was a five-hour dance session.

Nova and I hadn’t lasted the whole time, but it was painful to pull ourselves away.

It was on the third day when Quincey showed up in the kitchen, her phone in hand and a white stress line around her mouth. I could see she was biting the inside of her lip. Her hand was trembling as she shoved the phone to me. “Call them. Call him. I don’t care. Call someone.”

I took her phone, frowning at it until I saw the contacts she had pulled up.

Without giving her a second to back out, I pressed Graham’s name and hit speaker.

The ringing filled the room, and he answered a beat later.

Quincey looked ready to faint, so I started the conversation. Graham was quick to catch on, inviting us for dinner. At first, it was just him, his girlfriend, and the two of us with Nova.

Then Calihan found out about it and demanded to be included.

I knew this because I was included on the family text chain.

Quincey never okayed it, so I did.

Three hours later, the mom and stepfather were coming as well.

Quincey never okayed it, so I did it again.

She knocked on my door thirty seconds after I hit send and declared while hugging her phone against her chest, “Nova isn’t coming. Emily can babysit.”

And that was that.

Now that I was thinking about it, the dinner had been Graham. All Graham. Quincey just never said no, and throwing her a frown, I asked now, “Are you still wanting to do this? I can turn around.”

She didn’t answer.