Love, Creekwood (Simonverse #3.5)(18)

Anyway, I’m fine. It just sucked doing Valentine’s Day over FaceTime. Which is ridiculous, because I don’t even care that much about Valentine’s Day! Being apart on our anniversary was definitely worse. But it’s all kind of cumulative, I guess. I just miss you on top of missing you on top of missing you.

But I’m trying SO hard. I had a snowball fight with both Jacobs, and I’ve crashed every single one of Rachel and Liza’s a cappella rehearsals. I’ve been grabbing lunch after psych every day with Skyler. I’m watching every weird fucking horror movie Kellan puts on, and I’m playing violent video games with Jocelyn (even though she keeps killing me right when I respawn, she’s so ruthless). I guess it all seems so trivial when I write it out like that. But I don’t really know what else to do. If I’m going to be here, I should try to be here, you know? I have to let it be my real life.

I don’t know, B. I guess I’m figuring some stuff out.

But Bram, I want to know everything you’re up to. I want to know if you’re making snowmen, and stargazing, and eating barbecued dinosaurs, and watching weird performance art with Ella and Miriam, and befriending more makeup gurus. I want you to tell me every detail of your soccer games so I can nod along and pretend I understand what scrimmages and corner kicks are. Just be happy, okay? I want you to miss me, and think about me, and be in love with me, and be happy.

FROM: [email protected]

TO: [email protected]

DATE: FEB 16 AT 11:10 AM

SUBJECT: RE: DID YOU SEE THIS?

Dear Jacques,

You know, I always forget your emails have the ability to take my breath away.

I’m so bewildered by it. It’s just symbols and white space, and it’s affecting my basic biological functions. I think your keyboard must have some kind of direct link to my brain.

That last sentence.

Simon, let me be clear: I miss you. I think about you. I’m in love with you. Happiness is a shifting variable, but those are my constants.

I think you’re right to carve out a Real Life at school. That’s the healthy thing, right? I’m trying, too, though I don’t know if my Real Life is as exciting as you’re imagining. No snowmen so far, and I don’t know that stargazing is a thing in Manhattan. ? But I’m hanging out a lot with Ella and Miriam, and they are most certainly roping me into ALL the weird performance art. I don’t know if I’d say I’ve befriended Alec, but we’ve grabbed dinner a few times, and he keeps offering to do my makeup. Simon, how do I tell a beauty guru with half a million followers that I’m into makeup like the Pentecostal Church is into makeup? But I bet he’ll give you Troye Sivan eyes when you’re here in March, if you want (I promise I’ll wear my soccer knee socks for you if you do). You know everyone here is desperate to meet you, right?

And I don’t know what you’re figuring out, Simon, but if you ever need to talk it through, I’m all yours. But you know that.

And I miss you on top of missing you on top of missing you too.

Love,

Blue





FROM: [email protected]

TO: [email protected]

DATE: MAR 8 AT 4:17 PM

SUBJECT: RE: HELLO, SUNSHINE!!

Abby, I’m a DISASTER—I can’t believe I’m writing back to you a month late. I know. I know we’ve texted and WhatsApped a zillion times since then, but ugh, I’m still so sorry. And here you had so many really lovely questions for me that are all wildly out of date. But in case you’re for some reason still wondering: The rest of winter break was really good! Bram and I mostly just holed up at his mom’s house (strategic avoidance of the famous Jack and Emily Spier mortification two-punch). I did get back to Philadelphia safely on January 22nd. ? And yup, I know what I’m taking this semester (probably a good thing, seeing as the semester’s almost halfway over at this point, because I’m a jerk who takes a month to answer basic freaking questions).

Anyway, I’m on a train!! To New York!!! And I’m staying for a full week, during which I will be an EXEMPLAR of independence and self-restraint as Bram conquers midterms. And then he’s coming back with me to Philly. I’M SO HAPPY RIGHT NOW, ABBY. Every time anyone looks at me, I start smiling (and for the record, if you ever want a bunch of northerners to give you lots of extra space on a train, that’s the way to do it).

But you guys have early spring break like me, right? When do you leave for DC? I’m so excited Leah’s coming with you!! This will be her first time meeting the twins, right? And Xavier? I know Nick enjoyed meeting them (except the part where your cousin Cassie threatened to disembowel him if he ever hurt you. Apparently she was very convincing?). Okay, I’m guessing you don’t need recommendations for stuff to do, but Kellan wants me to tell you there are some really good Edgar Allan Poe attractions in Baltimore. So if you’re in the mood for learning about Edgar Allan Poe and driving up to Baltimore, there’s . . . that?

Okay, pulling into Penn Station! Safest travels to you guys, and please send lots of pics, and say hi to the Obamas for me if you see them??

Love,

Simon





FROM: [email protected]

TO: [email protected], [email protected], [email protected], [email protected], [email protected], [email protected]