Leaving Amarillo(54)

We ride the rest of the way to his house suffocating in tension and silence. I swallow hard as we pull up to their trailer, a rundown one off the highway that makes where I grew up look like a mansion. I’ve always known where he lived but I’ve never been inside. The gravel complains under the tires as we pull in and I relocate myself to the driver’s seat while he walks his mother to the door.

She’s screaming at him, waving her arms wildly and I can see how thin she’s becoming beneath her oversized white T-shirt and faded black skinny jeans. How this woman gave birth to something as beautiful as the broad, healthy man across from her is beyond my abilities of comprehension.

The scowl on his face turns to surprise when he walks away from her and sees me sitting in the driver’s seat. I meet his stare with defiance through the windshield, daring him to argue. He needs rest so badly he looks like he could fall facedown in the driveway and sleep for days.

Shaking his head, he walks around and slides into the passenger side.

“You know the way?”

I nod and shift the car into reverse. “I put it into the GPS on my phone. Two lefts and a right. We’ll be there in no time.”

My heart aches as if it’s being pulled when we pass the road that leads to Papa’s but I know there’s no time so I don’t say anything. It wasn’t the best idea since this is a covert operation as it is.

“I’m sorry we didn’t get to see him,” Gavin says quietly.

It hurts too much to discuss so I change the subject. “You should get in the back and lie down. Get some real rest before tonight.”

“You sure? I can navigate.”

I hold my phone up. “I got it. Promise. At least try to sleep, Gav. Please. For me.”

He acquiesces, and climbs over the seat. I barely even check out his ass as it goes past me.

I lean forward to turn the radio on but stop, because there is something I have to say first or I’m going to scream.

“Gavin?”

“Yeah?” My eyes rise to the rearview mirror and meet his while he packs his duffel beneath his head.

“We are going to talk later about why your mom asked you if you were holding. And you will explain her comment about bailing you out. But more importantly, if I ever see her lay a hand on you again, I will slap her the f*ck back. Hard.”

“Dixie—”

“Go to sleep, now. I just had to get that out.”

I focus on the road for the next eight hours. We’ll be late, but I know I look like someone who actually has food poisoning. It’s a hell of a lot more believable than the truth.

Gavin didn’t get as much sleep as I would’ve liked. His phone rang half a dozen times. Two calls were from people who he had to promise he’d get their money to within twenty-four hours. I know from the tidbits I could hear that he’s already promised the cash from a month’s worth of gigs to cover money he borrowed to get his mom out of jail.

Before I can open my mouth to ask once again why in the world he does this for her, his phone rings again and he tells the caller her car will be parked at our hotel. He laughs a little and says, “No, nothing like that. It’s . . . a lot more important than that.” His eyes drift over to me, and my face heats for some reason. Is he talking about me?

After we stop for gas at the halfway mark, he takes over the driving despite my protests. We’ve been driving only a few hours when his phone rings again.

“Son of a bitch,” he mumbles before taking this one. “Hey, Dallas.”

My stomach tenses. I’ve been texting my brother, but apparently that wasn’t enough.

“Yeah, man, she’s a trouper. We’ll be at sound check.” His hand tightens on the wheel and I notice that it’s sprinkling outside.

“You did? Shit. I didn’t hear you knock. She was probably asleep. I ran to a gas station to grab her some Gatorade. They didn’t have any in the vending machines.”

He’s lying. And doing it alarmingly well. Panic wells inside of me, rising to my throat like bile as I realize what my brother is saying. Dallas came to my room. We didn’t answer because we weren’t there.

“Yeah, man, I remember,” he says, barely loud enough for me to hear. “Got it. Look, I promise I’ll get her there in time. I’m not at the hotel right now. I have to meet up with a friend first but we’ll be at sound check on time come hell or high water.”

High water is an honest possibility at this point. The rain that ushered us out of Austin is now welcoming us back.

He says a few more things to my brother but I can barely hear them over the sound of the clouds pouring a year’s worth of tears upon us. Gavin drops his phone into the console and turns to me.

“You won’t have time to shower, but from the looks of the oncoming downpour, it won’t matter anyway.”

“Did he believe you?” I bite my thumbnail and watch the flashing red warnings of the brake lights in front of us. We slow practically to a stop. At this rate he lied about more than Gatorade. We’re not going to make sound check at all if traffic doesn’t move.

“Guess we’ll find out tonight. I’ll deal with him if not. Don’t worry about it.” He sighs and frowns at the cars in front of us.

“I bet you twenty bucks you can get us there in time.” My mind flickers to Afton. “We could always just drive right up to the stage.”