Kian (Undercover Billionaire, #1)(61)

Before Roxie could blink, Martha was there at her side and easily talked Lily into going with her to the barn to see the animals. Then Eden was dragging Roxie in another direction. She so wasn’t used to all this. She was thinking it might be safer to stick with her niece than with the adults.

She was pulled into the house, where a bunch of people were arguing about how the party should go, and since Roxie had no idea what was going on, she felt like a fish out of water. She simply sat back and tried to be invisible. Maybe it would have been better if she had made excuses and not come.

Time was escaping her as she sat around the house planning and making decorations. She didn’t realize three was approaching quickly. When she finally did look at her phone, she realized she was going to be late, if she chose to go.

She should at least text him, but she honestly had no idea what to say, so she sat there biting her lip as she continued to stress.

“Okay, tell me right now what you’re thinking about. It looks pretty intense,” Eden said, pulling Roxie from her thoughts.

She found her cheeks heating, giving away that she was indeed thinking of something. But she honestly didn’t know what to say. She and Eden hadn’t been in communication for a long time, and this was a lot to take in.

“It has to do with Kian, doesn’t it?” Eden guessed accurately.

Now her cheeks flushed even more. She hated that her skin gave her away so easily. She never had been one of those people who could so easily lie. She was a little jealous about that fact.

“No,” Roxie said, but even the sound of her voice betrayed her. It was shaky and deceptive. Eden laughed.

“Come on, everyone in this town knows Kian is crazy about you,” Eden said. “He’s been in such a better mood since you’ve come home.”

“That’s not true,” Roxie said. Then she sighed. She had to share her secret with someone. It was killing her. Maybe it would be a mistake, but she didn’t care. “Lily is Kian’s daughter,” she blurted.

“I figured,” Eden said, not at all surprised.

“What? How?” She stopped trying to speak as she looked at her friend.

“You forget I was there with you at the park when you and Kian ran into each other again. The sparks were flying, and something was going on. Besides that, Lily looks just like Kian’s little sister. It’s pretty obvious.”

“Well, now you know why he’s been around so much. He wants Lily,” Roxie said, feeling unusually depressed.

“You can’t possibly think that’s the only reason he wants to be around,” Eden said as if she were a fool.

“Why? Did you talk to him?” Roxie asked, feeling a bit of hope. It was ridiculous how much her emotions were going up and down at the speed of sound. She was the one who’d walked away from him. She’d been the one to betray him. Sure, they had shared a couple of great rounds of sex, but that in no way solved the issues between them, and she shouldn’t want to fix the issues, anyway. This was only about Lily, not about her and Kian.

“He doesn’t have to talk to me for me to see the way he looks at you. The man has always been obsessed. You two are like two comets on a collision course for each other, and anyone with any good sense at all knows to stay the heck out of your path,” Eden said.

“No. We’ve had our time together, and it didn’t work out,” Roxie said. Then she leaned in. “I got completely consumed by him. I didn’t even know who I was anymore.”

She felt so selfish saying this, but she had to talk about how she felt. If she didn’t, she’d never be able to work it out in her own mind.

“Don’t you think you can still be yourself and be in love?” Eden asked. She wasn’t in any way berating her, which made it possible for Roxie to continue speaking.

“I wasn’t able to do it before,” she admitted.

“You’ve also had some time on your own to grow up and figure out who you are away from him. Do you like yourself more or less when he isn’t a part of your life?”

Roxie had an immediate answer, but she closed her lips instead of spouting it out as she truly thought about the question. It wasn’t something she’d ever taken time to consider.

“I don’t know,” she said. “When I moved away, I was running. I didn’t even know who I was anymore, let alone what I wanted. I still don’t really know. My sister died, and I’ve been taking care of Lily now, and it seems that my identity is now wrapped up in my niece. But I love being with her. I don’t look at her as a burden at all,” she quickly added.

“I understand that,” Eden said. “But, honestly, it’s okay to think about yourself, too. You have to be happy and fulfilled in order to be a good aunt or mother or wife.”

“When in the heck did you become so knowledgeable?” Roxie asked.

A sad light entered Eden’s eyes as she leaned back. “I’ve had my own heartbreak to deal with, and it caused me to do some soul-searching. I don’t know that much, honestly, and it’s much easier to analyze other people than myself. I just know that you and Kian are meant to be.”

“Have you ever thought about talking to Owen, telling him how you feel?” Roxie asked.

Eden looked around the room to make sure no one was listening before she leaned in even closer and whispered quickly, “No. Don’t say his name. He moved to New York to be this badass fireman and didn’t even blink as he left me behind. It’s over between us, and I hope I never see him again.”