Forever, Interrupted(22)

“Sexy? Is he sexy?”

“Oh my God is he sexy. I can’t describe it, but when I’m with him, it’s like I’m with myself. I’m not worried about anything, I feel like I can say whatever I’m thinking and it won’t freak him out. I’m nervous.”

“Why are you nervous? This sounds amazing.”

“It is, but this is going so fast.”

“Maybe he’s the one. Maybe that’s why it’s going so fast. Because it’s right.”

I was hoping she would say this. I didn’t want to have to say it myself, because it seemed absurd. “No. Do you think?”

Ana shrugged. “Who knows? It could be! I want to meet this guy!”

“He’s really great. I’m just . . . What if I’m getting ahead of myself? He says I’m perfect for him and he likes me and it doesn’t feel like bullshit but . . . what if it’s all . . . ”

“An act?”

“Yeah. What if I’m being played?”

“I mean . . . being played how exactly? Did you sleep with him yet?”

I shook my head. “No, he just slept over and we slept next to each other.”

“That sounds pretty sincere.”

“Right, but what if he’s like . . . a con man or something.”

“You watch too much television.”

“I know I do, but what if he’s a con man? He’s just like this really sexy, really charming, perfect man who figures out your wildest fantasies of being swept off your feet by a man who loves pizza and bribes gelato workers and is an only child and then boom. My money is gone.”

“You don’t even have very much money.”

“Right, that’s why I need all that I have.”

“No, Elsie. I mean if he’s that good of a con man, he’d target a rich person.”

“Oh.”

“You know what I think?” Ana moved toward me and sat so my head was in her lap. “I think you’ve got a good thing going, and you’re making a mountain out of a molehill. So what, it’s moving fast? Just chill out and enjoy it.”

“Well . . . okay . . . What if there is a limited amount of swooning in a relationship and if you use it all up too fast, then it disappears?”

Ana looked at me like I had three heads. “You’re starting to stress me out. Give it a rest and stop trying to poke holes in a good thing.”

I thought about this for a moment and decided she was probably right. I was freaking out about nothing at all. I did the best I could to put it out of my head.

“You good?” Ana asked me, and I nodded.

“I’m good. I’m gonna chill.”

“Good,” she said. “Because we need to talk about me.”

I lifted my head, finally remembering the normal dynamic of this relationship and feeling much more comfortable about it. “Oh? What about?”

“Jim!” Ana could scarcely believe Jim wasn’t on the forefront of my mind.

“Right! How did it go the other night?”

“I slept with him,” Ana said, sounding disappointed in the act itself. “Totally not worth it. I don’t know what I was thinking. I don’t even like him. I think saying I wasn’t going to sleep with someone made me want to sleep with someone even if I didn’t really want to sleep with him. Does that make sense?”

I nodded again. Just then my phone rang. It was Ben. I showed the ringing phone to Ana, who excused herself from her own couch and I answered.

He was on his way home from work and asked if I was free.

“If you don’t have plans, I could come over and see you again tonight. I make no assumptions about sleeping over but I should be honest and tell you it’s a goal of mine.”

I laughed. “That sounds good. When were you thinking?”

“Have you eaten dinner yet? I could pick you up and take you out. Are you free now?”

“Oh, okay. I haven’t eaten. Um . . . now? I don’t know.” I knew full well now was fine. I was just a little worried about looking too available, as if I had left my evening open for just this purpose. That is, in fact, exactly what I had done, but you don’t ever want to admit that. “I can make that work,” I said. “Want to meet me at my place in twenty minutes?”

“Yes, ma’am. I do. I’ll see you then. Wear something fancy. I’m taking your ass someplace special.”

“Fancy? Okay, I need thirty minutes then.”

“I’ll give you twenty, but I’ll wait patiently in your living room for the other ten, how’s that?”

I laughed. “It’s a deal.”

I hung up the phone and said good-bye to Ana.

“Call me tomorrow morning, please,” she said. “And I’m saying tomorrow morning because I’m trying to be understanding, but if you get a moment to run to the bathroom and call me, I’ll be waiting by the phone.”

“You are my favorite person of all time,” I said as I kissed her cheek.

“Not for long, I’m not,” she said, and because she is a wonderful friend, there wasn’t a trace of resentment. She just saw the writing on the wall.

When I got home, I ran into the bathroom. I wanted to at least get makeup on before he came in the door. I have always lived by the rule that your clothes can be a mess but if your face looks good, no one will notice. I probably believe this because I’d like to lose ten pounds but I think my face is cute. Girls that work out all day and have huge boobs but boring faces probably think the face doesn’t matter if your boobs are taken care of.