Filthy Gods (American Gods 0.5)(24)

“You always protect everyone,” I added after a beat of silence. He sat down on the edge of the boat with a heavy sigh.

“I only do it for a select few,” he said, staring out at the calm water.

My heart beat in my chest, in my head, in my fingertips and I couldn’t look away from him.

“Semper fidelis,” I said, softly.

But by the way his head snapped toward me, his eyes catching mine in wide blue shock, he heard me.

His stare was powerful, forcing me to stay still. His mouth parted, but he didn’t speak.

For once, Nathaniel was rendered speechless in front of me.

He knew exactly what I had just spoken in Latin.

Speaking in another language, speaking in Latin to each other seemed so intimate, so personal and exposing. Only the two of us knew.

Always faithful. Always loyal.

Because he was. He was loyal to a select few and that loyalty was so powerful it ruined men and immortals.

And the fact I was in that select few made my heart pound.

I lowered my gaze, I could feel the weight of his on me like the sun burning my skin.

We sat in silence and then he moved, steering the boat and turning us around and back to the estate.

Maybe I had said the wrong thing. Maybe I had broken whatever spell was between us and he felt suffocated by someone like me.

I kept my eyes away from him, focused on the shore fast approaching.

When we docked and he stepped out to tie the boat up, I didn’t waste a second and hopped out, walking away.

“Juliette,” he called, but I didn’t stop.

His hand wrapped around my forearm and he spun me around. “Don’t walk away. Please.”

“I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable, I was just—“

“No.” His voice was harsh and I glanced up into his stormy gaze. “You just shocked me. I wasn’t…I wasn’t expecting you to say that to me. To think that about me.”

I froze, staring back at him. He looked at me like I had said something more powerful than anything he had ever heard before.

I licked my mouth, tasting the salty water on them. “You were supposed to be my enemy.”

His mouth quirked. “You were never my enemy, Juliette. Maybe that’s why.”

His thumb pressed just below my eye and he wiped a tear away. I wanted to fight him, I wanted to pretend that my heart beating inside of me was from my hatred of him and him alone, but I knew as he kissed me, my heart had already begun to betray my mind.

Soon, my mind would follow.





Weeks had gone by too fast and our affair started to become unclear. We spent each night together at the white cottage. He never slept in his suite. The floors of the cottage were no longer worn and broken; they were now fresh, dark hardwood and new white paint lined the walls from workers renovating.

Both of us slept together in the tiny cottage, bodies tangled, hands brushing over each other in soft, comfortable gestures. Each morning when the sun rose, I found myself wishing I could stay in his arms, stay in the darkness and live there with him.

Somehow, I had given him my body, my soul, and now my heart.

I didn’t know how or when it had happened.

As I laid in his arms, too afraid to fall asleep, too afraid to miss another second of our time together, I traced his jaw with my finger.

“How did you become friends with them?” I asked.

He stared at the ceiling, stroking my bare back with the tips of his fingers. “Who?”

“The American Gods,” I said, smiling at how silly the name was.

His fingers paused. “My family was friends with the Eastons, Gabe’s family. We grew up together. I earned his trust. I keep their secrets safe.”

“Secrets?”

His features grew hard. “Everyone wants to know every single detail about them. It’s a dark touchy subject. I respect that.”

I nodded, rubbing his arm. I could feel the tension the question had brought on.

“I give them my loyalty and they give me theirs. That’s how we work,” he whispered, staring off into the dark room. I could almost hear the waves rolling onto the beach. “We only let a few people into our inner circle. But once they’re let in, we’ll protect them.”

We only had two weeks until summer ended and we had to return to Yale. Two weeks until this summer affair ended and we were done giving into our distractions.

You’re a distraction to him, Juliette. Nothing else.

I knew what kind of man he was. He was determined, just like me, and he wouldn’t stop at anything to get what he wanted.

Not even love.

“You said you never saw me as your enemy, but did you ever hate me?” I asked. “You always seemed so keen on destroying my every argument.”

He hummed and caught my hand, bringing it to his lips. He kissed my palm gently. “I never hated you, Juliette.”

“You always pointed out everything wrong in my arguments, in front of everyone,” I said, lowering my eyes.

“I was an ass because I wanted to see you light up,” he said, touching my cheek and running his fingers through my hair.

“See me light up?” I raised my head, resting on my hand.

“All those heated arguments, watching your eyes flare, the fire burning inside of you, it got me hard so many times. I wanted to kiss your lips when you were lecturing me on the importance of the Roman Empire or China’s reform or the flaws in our government,” he spoke, lost in thought, still combing my hair. I felt weightless, breathless in his presence, listening to his words. “No woman has ever had such an intense effect on me.” His eyes lifted and sought mine, heated and dark and endless. “Just you, Juliette. And I want more of it.”