Evidence of the Affair(13)

Early last September, I realized I was two months pregnant.

You can imagine my surprise. But you can probably also imagine my glee.

And so I contacted a divorce attorney, packed my things, and within a month, I had moved back in with my parents in Massachusetts.

It brings me pride to tell you that I left that asshole.

And it gives me sheer joy to tell you that, last month, I gave birth to a beautiful daughter I named Margaret.

I am a divorcée and a single mother, and I live with my parents at the age of thirty-one. All things I never imagined for myself. But I’m doing all right with all of it, I have to say.

I have my maiden name back, and I’m in a city I love, with my family I have missed and my old friends. I’m about to get my real estate license. I listen to Joni Mitchell whenever I want. Right now, the trees are starting to bloom again. Maggie just learned how to smile.

And she feels like a great victory. Frankly, the past year or so has felt like a number of victories, even though it started out feeling like such a loss. But getting to know you—being with you—was the beginning of me understanding just how lost I was in my own life.

I needed so badly to see that regardless of whether I could carry a child, I was still me, still worth something. And no matter what my husband thought of me, I was still important. And while my mother often reminds me that I should have been able to see that myself, I am so thankful that you helped me get there. You gave me hope and perspective and confidence.

Right before you gave me my baby.

We are safe and secure here. I have the money from the divorce, and my mother and father have taken to being grandparents like nothing ever before. We do not need anything from you. I want only for you to know that we are here in Boston, should you ever want to find us.

Margaret and I are two little peas in a pod. I will take care of her with all my heart until my dying breath. She is in the very best hands. She will be loved from here to eternity.

I love her simply for existing. And I love her because she has been my liberation.

My life may not be perfect, but at least I can finally say it belongs to me.

Thank you, David. For everything.

We love you.

Love,

Carrie and Margaret Leah Hennessey