Crimson Death (Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter #25)(72)

“Yes. Sort of. This textbook has little bubbles in the corner of the pages with fun facts about the human body. I’ve been making my way through those.”

“Let’s hope they’re examinable,” I said. I banged the sheet music against the stand to knock the papers into place, before lining them up to start rehearsing.

“Hey, Ollie?” Will said just as I picked up my bass. “I’ve been thinking.”

Well, the bass went right back down at that. “Hmm?” He took so long to answer, I was gearing up to prod him into speaking when he finally spat it out. “I was angry at you for a while because I thought you should understand that I had to act in certain ways because I’m not out. So, when you didn’t take my side, I thought it meant you didn’t have my back.”

To say I was surprised to hear that was an understatement. It hadn’t even occurred to me that Will could have seen it that way.

“But,” he went on, “I thought about how I’d feel if you acted like you didn’t know me, or danced with someone else or whatever. And then I got it.”

“Got what?”

I mean, I knew what, from the tone of his voice, but I wanted to hear him say it.

“That I was being a fucking asshole to you.”

We sat in silence. I didn’t want to say it was okay, because I didn’t know if it was totally okay. Not yet. But it was nice to hear him acknowledge that. And also, I had a bit of thinking to do. I’d been upset because I wanted him to care about me more. But if he’d interpreted my behavior as me not caring enough, even if I didn’t agree with what he did, still, maybe that was a little more forgivable. At least, it was better than him just totally disregarding my feelings.

Will broke the silence in a small voice. “Do you wanna come over after school sometime? As friends,” he added quickly.

I couldn’t stop the surprise from flashing across my face. After that reaction from his dad the last time, I’d assumed visits were blacklisted now. Anything that seemed to make people suspicious had to be off-limits with Will. I’d been working hard on accepting that, and not getting too close or assuming it’d change, and here he was pulling the rug out from under me. Why did he always manage to catch me off guard, no matter what I expected from him? “What about your parents?”

“We can keep the door open.”

I hesitated. “It seems like your dad might suspect something, though.”

“I know. But I miss hanging out with you, and I’d like to see you more.”

I thought about it. “How about you come over to mine sometime? I’m only five minutes away from school.”

Will gave me a huge smile that warmed my stomach. “Okay.”

I made as if to start playing, but he spoke again. He was lucky he was cute, or I’d have to kick him out for distracting me when I had a deadline. “Hey, also, uh, are you busy Friday? We’re playing the regionals round.”

Right, because that’s how I wanted to spend a Friday night—watching guys throw balls at each other’s heads and congratulating each other on their excellence and athletic prowess when they managed to throw the ball in just the right way. Thrilling. “I can’t, sorry. I have this gig with Absolution on Friday.”

His face fell so suddenly I kind of felt guilty. I hadn’t realized he actually cared about having me there. But I wasn’t lying—I did have a gig. And it wasn’t exactly optional attendance. Anyone who didn’t think bass was important hadn’t tried listening to a punk song without it. Picture a chocolate sundae without any sauce, or a movie without any extras in the background. It’d work, technically, but the overall experience would lack a certain oomph.

“Oh. That’s fine. I hope it goes well.”

“I’d like it if you could come to the show, though. Maybe after the game?”

He could’ve thrown a tantrum about me missing the basketball game. Told me he was too busy with his own life to come to something that was important to me, just like I was too busy to go to his. But, like he always did, Will nodded immediately and said, “Of course.”

Then he went back to studying.

“How come you’re not in the library?” I asked suddenly.

“What?”

“It’d be easier to study in there, wouldn’t it? Quieter?”

He hesitated. “Is this you hinting you want me to go?”

“No, I swear. I’m honestly just curious.”

“Oh. I don’t know, I just like spending time with you.”

“But why do we always do what I want to do? You could ask me to go to the library with you, you know.”

Will gave me a funny, questioning smile. “I don’t mind?”

But that was the thing. He didn’t mind. He never minded.

Over the summer, Will had eagerly sat with me while I introduced him to all the bands I liked, without giving the bands he listened to the time of day. He’d taken up Music Appreciation, a subject he was never going to naturally excel in, because he wanted to see me without the judging eyes of his friends. When I’d escaped from the cafeteria to practice, Will followed me there, happy to sit by while I did my thing, even though there were probably a dozen ways he’d rather be spending his lunch.

And for the first time, it occurred to me that I’d asked for plenty of things from Will this year. Some things he’d given, some things he wasn’t ready to.