Crimson Death (Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter #25)(56)

She looked great. Awesome. I hated it.

But I was about to hate it quite a bit more, because at that moment she grabbed Will’s hand and led him onto the dance floor. Probably to take his mind off whatever had just gone down. She was probably being really thoughtful and sweet. She was probably a thoughtful, sweet person if Will had dated her.

I freaking hated it.

I was in the middle of striking a deal with the Great, Ethereal Being to send her uncontrollable, unattractive food poisoning—I was willing to volunteer at an animal shelter, take my parents out to a nice dinner, and sacrifice my eternal soul if she just went home in the next thirty seconds—when Beyoncé’s “Crazy in Love” came on. Will glanced over his shoulder at the basketball guys, then grabbed Jess’s hand and slowly spun her around. When she finished he pulled her into him, his hands slipping down her waist to her hips. Jess seemed startled, but she laughed and went along with it, swaying her hips in time to the song, with their pelvises way closer together than any two platonic friends would consider reasonable.

“What the hell?” I murmured.

“What?” Lara asked, lifting her head. “Oh shit. Am I psychic or what?”

I glowered.

“Get a sense of humor, Ollie, I’m joking. But … hmm. Wow.”

An out-of-breath Matt came over to our table and sat next to Lara, folding his leg so it pointed in her direction. “Hey, beautiful people,” he said. “How’s your night been?”

Jess had turned around so her backside was pressed against Will, and he leaned right into her, grabbing a handful of her skirt while they rocked, like he wanted to pull it right off her body. She twirled around to face him and put one hand in her hair, the other on his shoulder, and she brought her face close enough for him to kiss her, biting her lip and flirting the whole time. He didn’t kiss her, but he didn’t back away, either. And as far as I was concerned, he was about thirty seconds from kissing her.

My night was fucking swell, thanks for asking.

“I’m going outside,” I said to Lara, before staggering across the back of the room to the side door.

Holy shit. Had that really just happened? Will, my Will, had just practically hooked up with his ex-girlfriend in public, where he knew I could see him. And barely twenty minutes after he’d been dancing with me.

How could he?

And how could I let him do this kind of thing to me again? How many times was I going to put up with Will doing whatever the hell he wanted, whenever it suited him?

The air in the parking lot was icy. I gulped it down in huge gasps until my head cleared up. The lot was deserted. The dance wasn’t over for another two hours. It was too early for anyone to be leaving yet.

I wandered a few feet away from the door and sat heavily on the edge of the sidewalk. Screw tonight. And screw Will. I was going to make sure Lara had a way home, then I was leaving.

But after ten minutes I hadn’t made a move to do anything of the sort. I just sat, feeling empty and numb and tired.

I heard the door open, and my first thought was it was Will, coming to apologize.

But Will wasn’t wearing high heels. They clicked on the concrete, getting closer, until their owner sat down next to me in a rustle of pink chiffon.

I sighed. I was glad to see Lara, but I was disappointed she wasn’t Will. Because that meant Will was still inside with Jess, not caring that I’d disappeared.

Lara sighed right back at me. “I think I know why Will was acting like that.”

Because he was self-absorbed, self-interested, and devoid of empathy? “Why?”

“Matt just told me the guys found a picture of you on Will’s phone. Wearing his jacket.”

“Oh.”

“They gave him a hard time about it. Apparently Will was trying to say you guys took the photo to show how silly you’d look in a jacket that big, but they didn’t let him off the hook.”

“Right. So he wanted to prove himself?”

Lara smirked. “Apparently. Because he’s so super straight, right? ’Cause if you dry hump a girl that makes you straight. I, personally, turn straight every time I kiss a guy, too. That’s exactly how it works.”

Well, I didn’t miss the sarcasm that time. “Sometimes I think I don’t like him very much.”

Lara shrugged. “Hate away. I’ve hated Renee for over a year now, I think. Doesn’t mean I don’t love her.”

“Isn’t that a contradiction?”

“Nope. Apathy is incompatible with hate. Love works okay.”

We sat in silence for a few seconds, then Lara kicked at a few loose pebbles. “Be careful, though. Sure, you can forgive someone for hurting you by accident, right? But if they keep accidentally ripping your heart out over and over again, doesn’t mean they’re terrible people, but it probably means you’re better off getting to a distance where they can’t keep doing that. Accidentally or not.”

It didn’t seem like she was just talking about Will.

“We’re better than that, right?” I said.

“We damn well are.”

I was so angry that Will could so easily hurt me, without any hesitation.

But it made me even angrier to know that I’d let him.

I’d let him. He’d made it perfectly clear that he couldn’t give me what I wanted. So why had I stuck around? Why was I so willing to accept whatever scraps he handed out?