Conflicted (Everlasting Love)(16)
Jesse’s smile was bitter. “Isn’t that the truth?”
They walked toward the racing stables in silence for a few minutes before Dakota asked carefully, “So what was that chair thing all about?”
Jesse flushed as embarrassment hit him again—wasn’t it just his luck that the one time he lost control, his son was around to see it? “Nothing. I’m working through some frustration issues, that’s all.”
“With Mom?”
“Excuse me?”
“Come on, Dad. You two can pretend all you want, but you didn’t raise any stupid kids. We all know something’s up.”
“Nothing is up.”
“Whatever.”
“Dakota.” Jesse’s voice was serious.
“Yes?” Dakota stopped dead at the impatience in his father’s tone.
“When your mother and I need our three children running around in our heads, we’ll let you know. Until then, stay the hell out.”
“Got it,” he said with a rueful grin.
“Good.” Jesse smiled back. “Now I’ve got a couple calls to make. Why don’t you do me a favor and check to make sure every horse in here’s been exercised today?”
“Sure.” Dakota loped off, his long-legged stride taking him effortlessly to the charts at the far end of the stable.
Walking into his office, Jesse picked up the phone and the stack of messages sitting on his desk, prepared to answer the most pressing phone calls before he headed up to the house to get dressed. But he found himself staring at Dakota as he worked, wondering just how obvious he and Desiree had been in the past couple of years.
If Dakota, who lived a couple of hundred miles away and was the least observant of their children, had noticed, what could Rio and Willow be thinking? His heart hurt at the idea that he had been nowhere near as discreet as he had thought he was, that his children had known all along that something was wrong.
But maybe that wasn’t such a bad thing. He’d been worried the divorce would come as a huge shock to them, but maybe they’d been anticipating it for a while. Maybe it had seemed inevitable to everyone but him.
Desiree, despite her protestations of ignorance, had to have known this was coming. Why else would she have hired a new trainer, if she hadn’t expected things to fall apart between them?
Cursing himself and his inability to stop her from hurting him, Jesse turned to the messages and began dialing the phone. After returning the two most important phone calls—one about a horse he wanted to buy for the ranch and the other to an assistant trainer he and Desiree had discussed hiring—he crossed to Wink’s stall and petted the five-year-old stallion.
Peace flowed through him as his hands sunk into the horse’s long, wiry mane. His whole life might be a mess, but this, this was simple. He might not be able to communicate with his wife worth a damn, but at least he could still see what was going on with his horses.
Wink whickered softly, nudging him with his beautiful aristocratic nose. “I know, boy. I’m sorry your schedule’s so off today, but Willow’s getting married and everything’s a bit crazy. Tomorrow will be better, I promise. Tomorrow we’ll get you out for a nice long run, instead of that short little jog they gave you today.”
Would he even be here tomorrow? Next week? Sadness overwhelmed him and he leaned forward, burying his face against the horse’s neck and drawing strength from his old friend. He’d need every bit of strength he could find to get through the wedding and the reception without throttling Desiree.
He stroked the horse for a few minutes before turning away with a sigh. “Are you just about done, Dakota?” he asked. “It’s time to head up to the house.”
“I need a few more minutes, Dad. But go ahead if there’s something you need to do.”
There wasn’t anything he needed to do, but he was unwilling to stand around looking pathetic and useless in front of his youngest son. He should run by the maternity barn and check on M.C. Though he knew everything was going as planned with the very pregnant mare, he’d feel better if he saw her with his own eyes instead of relying on what his assistant trainers told him. She was one of his favorites, after all, and the foal she carried was incredibly important to the Triple H’s future.
Not that the ranch’s future was really any of his business anymore. He crossed the room to stare blindly at the pictures and newspaper clippings Desiree had hung so painstakingly on the wall—here and in the study in the house. Little bits and pieces of the Triple H’s history, little bits and pieces of her marriage. Too bad their feelings for each other weren’t as unchanging as these small scraps of paper.
He was drawn, inexorably, to the one clipping he’d actually mounted on the wall. Desiree had never understood why he’d chosen this story to mount, had asked him to take it down numerous times. But he’d remained firm. Failure, his failure, was as much a part of the Triple H as the successes were. And this failure, his first really big one, still smarted after all these years.
In one of the most shocking upsets in horseracing history, Crown Rhapsody lost the Belmont Stakes, and in doing so lost the Triple Crown many believed the horse was all but guaranteed.
After an incredible showing at both the Kentucky Derby and the Preakness, where she finished both races at least two lengths ahead of the field, the Triple H’s horse’s winning streak came to an end in the middle of the Belmont Stakes.