Co-Ed(52)

I gulped as tears filled my eyes. “And the boyfriend?”

“Me,” Knox said in a low voice.

“And all of you… You all—” I couldn’t get the words out.

Leo and Finn eyed each other then Knox.

And then Knox turned around and slammed his hand against my dorm-room door.

Slater answered three slams later with a fist to Knox’s jaw.

They stumbled backward against the couch.

I let out a shriek as Finn pulled me out of the way.

“You son of a bitch!” Knox roared. “You had no right!”

“She was my sister!”

“We BROKE UP!”

“Then maybe she wouldn’t have killed herself!” Slater bellowed. “She loved you, all three of you! And you led her on, you fed her demons! And it was too much, too much when you guys got your heads on straight, too fucking much—” He punched the wall with his fist, chest heaving. “Never leave a man behind, right? You left her to pick up the pieces, and she was too far gone to even recognize what they fucking looked like.”

“I didn’t know.” Knox’s voice cracked. “She pushed me away, pushed all of us away. Lex and Finn thought—” He closed his eyes. “—they thought that if they could just—”

“Replace Knox—” Finn gulped. “—that she’d be okay. She said she just wanted to have fun. We never thought it was that serious until it was too late.”

“She overdosed because she couldn’t live without you. You guys were like fucking poison to her,” Slater said in a quiet voice.

“No, man.” Knox grabbed him by the shoulders. “She was poison to herself. Don’t you see it? She used us just like she used drugs. Don’t you think I asked her to stop? Asked her to get help? How many times do you think I drove her home from parties covered in other guys spit? Seeing her clothes ripped, her face gaunt. She was gone before we even knew it.” Then Knox hung his head. “I take full responsibility. I always will. She was calling me for help, and I…” He closed his eyes. “…I ignored it. I couldn’t take it anymore.”

“She died listening to your voicemail, you fucker!” Slater thundered.

I gasped, covering my mouth with my hands.

Every set of eyes met mine.

Knox’s looked pained while the other two just looked guilty. And Slater? He looked like he was visiting hell, and I felt like I was right there with them.

This wasn’t about me.

It never had been.

I’d never done drugs.

But I understood what it was like to get addicted to the type of friends these guys were, and knowing I was losing that? It would kill me. And I barely knew them the way she probably had.

I backed up slowly then turned and ran.

Grabbing only my cell phone in the process.

Tears clouded my vision as I took the stairs down to the first floor, and I ran right into Alexa. My cell fell to the ground and shattered.

“Shawn?” Alexa grabbed my hand. “What’s wrong? You’re shaking!”

“Nothing.” I picked up my phone and pressed my free hand to my head. “Sorry, just not the best night I’ve ever had.” I sucked in the tears then lost it as she wrapped her arms around me.

“Shit, what did that guy do to you?”

“Guys, plural. Long story.” I sniffed. “I just want to forget about it.”

She wrapped an arm around me. “I know just the thing, but we need to get you changed. You can’t go to a party dressed like an athlete. Let’s get you in a short skirt and party the bad thoughts away. Plus, I heard they have Jell-O shots.”

I shrugged. “Count me in.”





Chapter Thirty-Six


Knox

“Her cell keeps going to voicemail.” I slammed my hand against the couch cushion while Slater tried on his phone.

The minute she’d walked out of the room, I’d punched him, earning a punch back and a black eye.

Leo and Finn had pulled us apart.

And that was when it had hit me.

She hadn’t stayed.

I’d scared her away.

I’d done what I knew I would always do.

My past would always be there to haunt the present, and from the look in her eyes, it wasn’t something easily forgivable.

I wasn’t dumb.

I knew that.

I had just hoped.

That was the fucking problem.

She had me hoping.

And now my chest hurt.

And my brain was overanalyzing every single place she could be and aggressively causing my thoughts to spin out of control. Was she injured? Was she alone? Was she crying?

“Same here,” Slater sighed and punched the stupid unicorn.

“Can’t believe you still have that thing,” I muttered, holding a bag of frozen peas to my face.

Slater shrugged then winced like it hurt to move. “Unicorns were her favorite, and keeping a picture of her just seems… too morbid.”

“But keeping a possessed unicorn is what? Better?”

“It’s not possessed.”

“On multiple occasions, I found it watching me sleep, but sure…”

“Practical joke. She used to—” He smiled then stopped.