Chaser (Dive Bar #3)(30)

“Whatever. Works for me.” Pat raised the glass to us both. “To Ada.”

We all drank. And this felt good, it felt right to try mending fences with Pat. Someone new had been born into the world today, and somehow that seemed to reset things. Anyway, after everything we’d been through over the years, it was time. No one could doubt that Nell and I had been a hell of an accident. A gigantic mistake. Whatever you wanted to call it.

“How are you holding up?” he asked, gaze serious.

“Um, fine.” Weird question. God knows I’ve pulled off more than a few all-nighters over the years. And under much more dubious circumstances. So I was doing great. I’d even skipped some sleep to pick up a toy for Ada at the local toy shop. It would be past visiting hours by now, of course, but I was pretty sure I could charm my way past a few nurses to drop it off. “You?”

A vague smile. “Eric, you lost a child last year. And last night, you watched someone else’s baby being born. I’m asking if you’re okay.”

I blinked, surprised. “Right.”

My brother had gone strangely quiet. Fair enough, this wasn’t what I’d been expecting either. But I thought it over for a minute, giving the question its due.

“I’m okay.” I straightened my shoulders. “It was heavy, but it’s all good. I mean … I’m glad they both got through it okay and there were no major problems or anything. That’s what matters, right?”

“Sure,” agreed Pat, clasping his tattooed hands together on the bar. “But if you needed a couple of days, no one would blame you.”

Shit. This was not what I’d been expecting when I invited him over for a drink. It was stupid to bring Nell’s miscarriage up. This was totally different. The time with Nell, I hadn’t even been around. That was why it had happened, after all. I hadn’t been there to pick up Nell after work, so Joe had had to drive her back home. But this time was different. This time when it mattered, I was there.

“I’m not too busy,” continued Pat. “The parlor can close for a few days and I’ll cover for you.”

“Not a bad idea,” said Joe. “I’ve got a few jobs on, but Vaughan’s home for a while. Wouldn’t be a bad time to take a break.”

“Um, look…” I said, taking a deep breath. “Appreciate the thought, but I don’t need any time off or anything.”

Pat just shrugged.

“Sure about that?” asked Joe. “He’s right. I should have thought of it myself. But no one would blame you for wanting some space. A bit of time to get your head around it. I can see if Dad could take on a couple of the jobs and join you if you wanted company.”

“I don’t need any fucking time off.” My voice tensed, despite my best efforts to stay chilled. “Thank you, but no. I’m good.”

Neither of them spoke.

“Look, can we just relax and enjoy the drink?” I asked. “Let’s celebrate the arrival of little Ada. That’s what I want to do right now.”

“Sure.” Pat took another sip. “Jean said you nearly fainted like some girl.”

I snorted. “I’ve spent the last twenty-four hours seeing what girls can do. That’s no insult, my friend.”

Tongue digging into his cheek, he grinned. “True enough.”

“I’d be taking every damn drug they’d give me and crying for more,” said Joe. “Probably begging for my mommy. Shit like that.”

“Hell,” I said. “I nearly did all that and I wasn’t even the one giving birth.”

“To women.” Pat raised his glass and we all toasted.

I cleared my throat. “But, Pat, if you pass out while Nell’s pushing your baby out into the world, reasonable or not, we’re going to give you shit about it for years. That’s the god’s honest truth.”

“Forever,” corrected Joe.

“Right, my bad. Forever.”

“Assholes.” Pat chuckled. Then he fixed me with his gaze. “It was really that intense? I mean, they showed us a documentary at the hospital class the other night. But it didn’t seem that bad.”

“Wait for the real thing,” I said, voice serious. “There are no words.”

“Damn,” he muttered, going a little pale.

“Ah, true fear. Now you are beginning to understand.” I laughed. “My work here is done.”

With a dour look, Pat flipped me off. My brother started laughing too, thumping the bar with the flat of his hand. What can I say, a tired crowd is an easy one to entertain.

“You got him scared,” said Joe, sipping at his drink.

“I’m not scared.” The big, hairy, tattooed dude shook his head. “It’s just … so long as Nell’s okay, everything’ll be fine, you know?”

“Absolutely,” I said without hesitation. “And she will be. The baby too.”

“Yeah.” Pat shook off the worry, raising the glass again. “Guess we should drink to Jean too.”

“To Jean.” Joe and I tapped our glasses against Pat’s and drank.

“Doctor said she and the baby should be home in a few days.”

“Great,” I said, but I didn’t think it would be quite so soon. She just had an operation, after all. I’d been rejigging my schedule to fit a few more visits in.