Betrayed(32)

He saw her through the kitchen window, stopped for a moment and allowed himself to watch. She talked on a phone, face screwed in concentration, body angled over, and a splash of white flour on her nose. His eyes rested on her hair, on the way it fell over her face, the way she brushed it off, on the arch of her neck, which had been so good to kiss.

Watching Kat engendered powerful feelings, animal cravings, which would engulf him if allowed. His yearning was a million miles outside reason. Kat, and no one else, could bring out such emotion.

He moved forward toward the door and she must have heard his footsteps because she suddenly looked up. Light from the kitchen flooded him as she opened the door. Her body language changed as she recognized him, immediately rigid. He filled with sentiment. Why had things changed so much?

He said, “You should be more careful. The automatic gates, they’re open. Electric gates are for shutting. Where’s the security if you leave them open?”

Kat clutched at the doorjamb for support, he watched her knuckles go white. She said, “What do you want? I thought I’d seen the last of you.”

“I’d hoped it was more a case of what you want?”

Her eyes narrowed into slits. She turned to go back into the house.

“Wait!” He took two strides to reach her side. He was ashamed to find his hands shaking, and stuffed them into his pockets.

She said sharply, “Don’t tell me what to do, Rafael. Not in my house. I’m not one of your lackeys.”

“Is this the real you, Kat. Playing games with people’s emotions until you’ve sucked out every drop of dignity. Is this what you did to the others?”

“Don’t be stupid.”

“Then why do it to me?” He stared at her. Why did she have to look so defenceless? Her vulnerability had always been intimidating. Rafael hated her now for reminding him of it. Would there never be an escape?

He said more evenly, “Well!”

She still didn’t speak. The clammy heat of the evening washed over him in waves. His shirt clung, sticky and uncomfortable. All the old fears, all the old emotions raced through his gut. His tongue felt huge as if it would never work again.

He swallowed. She would probably hate him for what he had in store, but he had to go through with it. “Do you know what you are?” he said. “You’re a destroyer, a f*cking destroyer. You rip people’s hearts out. You take what you want then when you’re finished; toss them away like pieces of shit. People think I’m callous, but you? Compared to you, I’m a f*cking beginner.”

Katrina clamped her hands over her ears. “I’m not listening.”

Rafael hit the kitchen surface with the flat of his hand. “You will listen! You’ll hear me out if it’s the last thing you do.”

“You’ve been drinking! You’re drunk! I can smell alcohol on you.”

“And you’re a dangerous vixen.” His lips stretched thin. “But in the morning I’ll be sober… You? You’ll still be as dangerous. Meanwhile, I’m quite capable.”

“Capable of what?”

Fragments of memories fluttered across his eyes. He’d once thought himself adept at lovemaking. Now how did he feel? Washed out… disgraced… angry with her for doing this to him. Damn angry. He reached and slammed the door shut so there was no quick means of escape.

She appeared to shrink as he drew closer, looked at him with alarm.

He said, “Don’t pretend you’re scared; I couldn’t begin to believe it.”

“The mood you’re in, you’re capable of anything.”

Predictable that she would shift the responsibility on him. He said, “For heaven’s sake, you make it sound as if I’m the one causing the pain.”

“Why have you come, Rafael? What are you after?”

Rafael had the abrupt sensation of being cornered. She’d twisted things again. He said, “I wanted to let you see what you’ve done, how low you’ve driven me. I came to vent my feelings.”

“Well you’ve vented them, so you can go.”

“It’s not all.”

“So what is?”

“You’re seeing your mother. I’ve arranged it.”

There, he’d said it. He watched her carefully to see what her response would be.

Kat went white and started to turn away. “Like hell I am.”

Rafael grabbed her arm. She tried to shrug him off but he tightened his grip. “You’re going to listen to what she has to say. You’ve got it wrong. You’ve got everything wrong.”

She glared ferociously. “You know nothing.”

“You’d be surprised what I know.”

“Bastard!”

“Don’t worry, I’ll be gone soon, the flight’s arranged,” he said. “But I’m going to see this through first… then I won’t bother you again.”

“It won’t be soon enough.”

“I just want you to know whatever game you’re playing, you’ve won. I accept defeat. I submit. Aliaga was right; I should’ve listened to her. But you’re damn-well going to do this before I go.”

“You shit!” she said hoarsely. “What gives you the right to interfere?”

She tried to beat at his chest with her fists but he held her firm. Rafael squeezed his eyes shut, tried to ward off treacherous thoughts leaping to mind. Even now, she could drag emotions out of him that he didn’t even know he had.

He said, “Jeez… I love you.”

He heard Katrina catch her breath.

It became silent.

He had said the wrong damn thing again. She’d told him never to say it.

“And what about all the others?” she whispered. “Do you love them too? Francine? The party seekers, what about them? Do you love everybody?”

Rafael stared. Things were spoiled again. He was sworn to secrecy and couldn’t explain. He became filled with a deep sense of loss.

She said with triumph, “You can’t confront truth, can you?” She spun away. “You mess with my head. I can’t put up with it anymore.”

He said, “You should talk to Francine. Listen to her side.”

Kat threw back her head and her hair spilled into curtains. She said, “Maybe I will.”

“Francine is weak, that’s her problem. She gets taken advantage of.”

“I think I know her well enough, thank you.”

“Do you. I think perhaps not as well as you hope. I don’t think you’ve ever known.”

She lifted her head proudly. “I know more than you’ve ever given me credit for.”

“Have you?”

“Your reputation is hardly untainted.”

“My reputation?” Rafael pulled his face. “We’ve been down this road a dozen times. I’ve already told you, the fantasy is wrong.”

Kat laughed scathingly. “So you’re telling me you don’t like wine, women, and song? Rafael, you were caught. Don’t lie your way out.”

“You’re wrong, you know.” He shook his head disparagingly. “But I needed to tell you what I thought. I needed to put the record straight. You should talk to the right people before you accuse anyone of lying. Talk to Francine; talk to your mother.”

“The record is already as straight as it needs to be. I’ve seen through you, Rafael. Don’t take me for a fool.”

“I’ve never taken you as a fool, Kat, you should know that.”

“These are lives you’re messing with. Don’t you respect anyone’s feelings?”

“Feelings? What the hell do you know about feelings?” He said. “And as for pretending. You’re the one who’s pretending. I hoped it wasn’t true but…well let’s say I know better now.”

“For God’s sake stop play acting. Get real!” Kat covered her ears to shut his words out. Rafael instinctively tried to hold her. She pushed him away. “What a damned fool I was,” she sobbed. “I meant nothing to you. I thought it was heaven, but it turned to hell.”

“You meant everything to me.”

She spun from him and made for the outside door. He followed. She marched across the gravel drive, to the lawn, and down to a seat close by the summerhouse. She sat facing the house. Lamps came on automatically and flooded the garden and house with light.





He sat at the other end of the seat without looking at her. He said, “Listen to me.”

“No Rafael. I won’t listen. I’m through with listening.”

“No you’re not, Rafael said heatedly. “I’m going to tell you one last time. I love you. It’s simple, and it’s true. You destroyed me and damaged the company, but I still love you. You need to get your facts straight. Talk to the right people.”