Behind the Mask: A Rockstar Romance(46)

“It does explain a lot with Tegan, but I know music to her is like being close to her parents. After your mom and dad passed, it broke her. She was consumed by hurt and grief. Music was her escape.”

“It’s weird thinking what we were all feeling over the years and none of us actually knew.” We both laugh.

“I just want my music to touch people, to make a difference,” he continues.

“It does. Your music affects loads of people. Your voice, it touches people.”

He shakes his head, not believing me. An idea pops into my head. I down two shots that were on the table and stand.

“Where are you going?” he asks, standing with me.

“To sing a song that may make you think differently.” I wink at him, stumbling over to the guy who is doing the karaoke, whispering in his ear.

He looks at me like he is star dazed, going through his lists of songs and finding the one I want. I am sure he can’t believe we are all in here. I take hold of the microphone, hearing Troy and Naomi screaming out my name, and I lift my arms in the air, shaking my body a little.

“Hall of Fame” by The Script comes on and I smile at Nate, who starts laughing to himself. I lift the microphone to my lips and start singing to him. I move my body from side to side as I sing out the words. When the chorus comes on, my voice goes stronger. I want Nate to know he can go the distance. The world will always remember his name.

My eyes stay on his and he watches me. I smile as I sing, loving the song. I look then at my family. They may not be blood, but they are my family. The roadies are dancing, singing along with me. I smile at them, glad I have them in my life.

I continue as I think about the family that I will be giving up, but I know with or without me they are going to be great and go far.

With or without me.

The song ends. I get down off the stage, the place applauding me. I walk to Nate, who is standing clapping. “I think you made your point.”

“As long as it was made.” I chuckle. He hands me a shot. I smirk at him as I take it. “I’m going to quickly head to the bathroom,” I tell everyone, heading in that direction.

After doing my business, I wash my hands. As I look in the reflection, my head feels a little dizzy. I stick my tongue out at myself, causing me to laugh.

God, I’m weird. I think to myself, making me laugh again.

“Are you laughing at yourself?”

I look at the door to see Nate standing there.

“Nate, this is a girls’ bathroom,” I whisper. I have no idea why I’m whispering.

“I wanted to make sure you were okay and not throwing your guts up.”

“Nope, no throwing up. Well, yet anyway,” I joke, causing us both to laugh. I jump on the sink counter and Nate walks in, standing in between my legs. “You really are good-looking.” I lift my hand, moving some of his hair away from his eyes. I shouldn’t have done that as his eyes, his amazing eyes, look into mine. “I hate your eyes,” I say.

“Why do you hate my eyes?”

“Because they always draw me in. I have a thing about eyes and your eyes are always so intense. They are like panty dropping eyes. You just have to give someone a look and they are yours.”

He chuckles. “Why hasn’t it worked on you then?” He steps in farther into me.

“It has, you just never wanted my panties to drop.” I know what I just said sounded stupid, but the alcohol is making me a little mellow.

“It’s because I’m an idiot.”

“I know.” I smile at him, and he smiles back.

“I hate your smile too. Why do you have to have a nice smile? Nice eyes? Be so good-looking? Have a god-like body with a huge dick?” I shake my head.

“You really think that of me?”

“Every girl thinks that about you. But yes, that’s what I think. Your body is perfect and, yes, from what I could feel earlier, your dick is big.”

“I think your body is perfect.”

I scoff, waving him off. “My body isn’t. I have so many flaws. The one thing I do like about myself is my voice. Only because my parents loved it.”

“Why do you think I went gaga over it for years? I thought I made up your voice in my head.”

“Gaga.” I laugh. “I like Lady Gaga.” I wrap my legs around his waist. He steps in farther into me. “Can I ask you a question?”

“Of course.”

“Before recently have you ever wanted to fuck me? I mean, actually fuck me”

He looks taken aback.

“You can say no. Don’t feel you have to lie.” I feel his hands go to my thighs.

“I have lost count how many times I wanted to fuck you. I remember when the first time I thought of you like that. It was Halloween and you were sixteen. You were dressed in a corset and ruffle shorts. Your hair in messy waves, your makeup looking all gothic. You looked so grown up, but I remember I was standing against the wall and I think someone pushed you and you landed against me, your back to my front and you must have dropped something as you bent over to pick it up, your ass pressed against my crotch. My mind went straight to the gutter and images of me fucking you bent over were entering my head.”

Oh shit, I remember that.

“I was sixteen. You were what, twenty-one?”

“I knew it was wrong. I shouldn’t have looked at you like that, but I did. I didn’t see you like that again until your eighteenth birthday and you were dared to give one of your friends a lap dance. I remember watching you moving your hips, the look on your face. It was such a turn on.”