Be Good A New Adult Romance (RE12)(31)

“That’s what you look like when you’re turned on,” he said.

I stepped back from him, still in a haze from the kiss. Brett and I stared at each other for a long minute. Then I said, “What about Becca? How do you feel when you kiss her?”

Before he could respond, I heard her voice behind me.

“Brett,” she said as she took her place next to him and grabbed his elbow. “What’s going on?” She gave me an icy glare.

“What is going on, Brett?” I said coldly.

He gulped. He looked from me to Sweater Vest then back to me. I gave him another few seconds to respond and when he didn’t say anything and didn’t make any move to remove himself from Sweater Vest’s grasp, I figured his choice was made – again. I was still the loser.

“Well, there’s a gorgeous guy waiting for me and he’s horny as hell and ready to rock and roll, so if you’ll excuse me…” I turned and left Brett and Sweater Vest standing there. I didn’t turn back to check but I was pretty sure they were both gaping at me.

“The bartender remembered your drink,” Jay said as I sat back down at the table with him.

“I bet he did,” I muttered under my breath.

“He asked me if I thought you’d like a double.”

“And what did you say?”

“Yeah, sure, why not?”

“Did he tell you what time his shift ended?” I added because I was in a foul mood and couldn’t help myself.

Jay looked at me with a puzzled expression. “Why would he tell me that?”

I wanted so badly to tell him that the double was more than just a drink but I held my tongue. Jay couldn’t help it that he was so clueless. “Never mind,” I said instead. “Let’s dance.”

The DJ started playing and a few people were floating towards the dance floor. I grabbed the drink that Jay had gotten me and downed it one big gulp. Then I grabbed Jay and pulled him on the dance floor.

The DJ played some hard-hitting rock. The alcohol was starting to hit me and as I moved to the music, I felt myself getting lost in the beat. I could feel Jay behind me. He grabbed my waist and started pushing himself against me. We were both moving like we were having sex on the dance floor. I might have been embarrassed if I hadn’t downed the equivalent of five drinks on an empty stomach.

I closed my eyes and tried to lose myself in the beat of the music and the feeling of Jay touching me and moving his body with mine. His desire for me was more than evident. The more our bodies moved together on the dance floor, the more evident his desire became. Yet all I could think about was Brett. I wanted it to be Brett’s hands touching me. I wanted it to be Brett’s body pressed against me. I wanted Brett to want me but he wanted Becca.

When the song ended, and the DJ said he was taking a five minute break, Jay and I stopped moving. I suddenly felt awkward with his hands on my hips and his body so close to mine. I took a few steps away from his and he released his hold on me.

When I glanced over toward Brett and Sweater Vest, I could see he was headed in my direction and she was following close on his heels. I was definitely not in the mood for another confrontation.

Brett grabbed my elbow. “Can I talk to you for a minute?” he asked as he tried to pull me from the dance floor.

“Dude, what’s up?’ Jay said. He was trying to be casual but I could hear some strain in his voice.

Brett didn’t respond to Jay verbally. He just glared at him. That made me angry because Jay wasn’t doing anything wrong.

I ripped my elbow from Brett’s grasp. “I have nothing to say to you,” I spat.

Now it was Sweater Vest, who grabbed Brett’s elbow. “I’m getting tired. I want to go back to the hotel.”

Brett looked at me. Then he looked at Jay. Then he looked back at me. “You don’t have to do this,” he reminded me. He looked miserable and I could feel what was left of my little heart breaking. Misery of Brett’s own making, I reminded myself but it didn’t make me feel any better.

“Let’s go,” Sweater Vest whined as she pulled on his elbow. Brett nodded but he didn’t take his eyes from mine.

“You’d better go,” I mocked. “You don’t want to keep Becca waiting.”

She glared at me until Brett allowed her to pull him away.

“What was that all about?” Jay asked. His tone wasn’t angry, he seemed confused and even a bit concerned.

Before I could respond, the water works started and I began to sob uncontrollably.

“Are you okay?” Jay asked.

“No,” I managed to get out between sobs. “I’m not okay.”

“Can I get you another drink? Jay was trying to help but failing miserably.

I just cried harder. “I’m going back to the hotel.”

“Do you need a ride?”

I shook my head. “I don’t want to ruin your evening. I’ll just grab a cab.”

“Okay,” Jay said but he didn’t sound like he agreed with the plan. “Are you sure you’re going to be okay?”

I nodded. “I’ll be fine,” I lied. I was anything but.



***



I couldn’t get to my room fast enough. I knew my eyes were already red and swollen from crying but I felt like I wasn’t even close to being cried out. The first thing I did when I got inside was to grab the tissue box from the bathroom and take it to the bed with me. I blew my nose then put my head down on the pillow and inundated the poor flat thing with tears.

In between heaving sobs, I thought I heard a soft knock on the door. At first, I thought it was my imagination but then the knocking continued. I rushed over to answer it hoping it would be Brett.

I heaved a heavy sigh of disappointment when I saw it was Jay. He had his hands in his pockets and looked forlorn. “I just came by to make sure you were okay.”

He was nervously kicking at something on the floor.

“Thanks,” I said.

He looked up at me. I was sure I looked like a complete wreck. Swollen eyes. Red nose. Hair askew. The whole nine.

“You’re not okay, are you?”

I shook my head.

“It’s that guy, isn’t it? The one on the dance floor. I saw him follow you to the bathroom.” Maybe Jay had a little more on the ball than I initially gave him credit for.

“His name is Brett,” I said even though I wasn’t sure why.

“I know what it’s like to love somebody, who wants somebody else.” Jay apparently had a lot more going on upstairs than I thought.

“Is it that obvious?” I asked.

He nodded.

We stood there for an awkward moment just looking at each other. Then Jay said, “I just want you to know that you’re exceptionally cool and totally hot.”

We both laughed. “You know what I mean,” Jay continued. “If I had someone like you, I’d never let you go.”

“Thanks.” I gave Jay a kiss on the cheek.

“If you ever just wanna hang out or something, let me know.”

“I will,” I said, even though I knew I never would.



***



I yawned as I dragged my suitcase onto the elevator. I breathed a small sigh of relief as the elevator door started to close. I wanted to avoid contact with any other human being, if possible, because I looked like total dog shit. There wasn’t enough concealer on the planet Earth to cover the redness and swelling under my eyes and my nose had been blown so much there were actual blisters forming under my nostrils.

I would have no such luck. A hand stopped the doors from closing just at the last minute. Because the universe has a perverse sense of humor, of course, it was Brett, who stepped into the elevator.

I must have known somewhere deep inside we’d run into each other. I felt like we both had homing devises that connected us on some deep unconscious level. And knowing that we’d see each other one last time, I did what any girl would do. I wore his Pearl Jam shirt. The one, he’d sort of given me the first time we were together.

He took in a breath when he saw me. “You look so good in my shirt.” He seemed to say it without thinking. When our eyes met, his looked full of sadness and regret.

“Where’s your friend?” Brett asked.

“I don’t have any friends,” I said coldly.

I knew he wanted to ask if I’d slept with Jay but he couldn’t find the right words to do it. I let him stew for a few seconds before I said, “I was alone last night.”

He let out a breath.

“But you weren’t,” I added. “Where’s Becca?”

Brett averted my gaze and looked down at his sneakers. “She had to make a few phone calls. She’s meeting me downstairs. We’re going to share a cab to the airport.”

“That’s nice.” There was acid in my tone.