Ballers: His Game (Ballers Series Book 1)(53)

I slip into the stable and the calm of the horses grounds me. I head straight to Autumn, my new horse. I see a blanket outside her stall and reach for it as it has gotten cooler out. The tent for the party itself was actually heated. I wrap myself in the blanket and lean my head against Autumn’s, as I pet the side of her head. She is such a sweet horse.

“What do I do, Autumn?” I whisper. “I have never been so hurt. All of his promises mean nothing because he lied.”

I don’t know how much time goes by while I continue to plea with Autumn for answers she will never give me. I haven’t been able to stop the tears that started the moment I realized she wouldn’t be answering me and that I still don’t know how I got here.

I feel him in the stable with me before I see him. I look for the nearest exit but I am too late. He wraps his arms around me and buries his face into my hair. In that moment, I shatter. This is home for me, what do you do when your home is taken from you?

B

I have looked all over for Tam. I had come into the stable to grab a horse to broaden my search and cover more land. I have no idea why I didn’t think to look here first. My head is still too messed up at the thought that Tiffany and Donna would go so far to ruin my engagement party.

That video was not what it looked like, but I know that it looked a certain way to Tam and our hundreds of guests. This is all on me. I let my family down once again, but I won’t lose my woman over this. I can’t.

“Tam, baby, you have to listen to me,” I say gently into her hair.

She spins in my arms and my heart breaks even more as I see the tears soaking her face. I never want to see my baby hurting. I love this woman with everything that I am. I go to cup her face but she pulls away. I place my hands on the stall behind her and bend to place my forehead to hers as my own tears form.

“You hurt me,” she chokes out. “How could you lie to me like that?”

“I have never lied to you,” I say as my own tears start to fall. I have never cried like this, but with Tam I feel everything in the depths of my heart. This lie that I have no control over has hurt her, but it is not a lie I have told.

She scoffs and turns her face away from me. I press my forehead to the side of her face and move my arms to wrap around her. She struggles at first but I tighten my hold.

“Just leave me alone,” she whimpers.

“I can’t. I love you. I would never lie to you Darlin’, I swear it,” I respond.

“You told me you didn’t love her. You said you never had those types of feelings for her. You said you made that clear to her. So what didn’t you lie about Brad? Because that video made it clear about everything you did lie about,” she snaps.

I cup her face and turn it, forcing her to look up at me. “I never loved her and that tape proves nothing. I told you Tiffany was into acting. She would come to my place and ask me to rehearse lines with her. A few times she taped it. She said she wanted to watch the videos back to see what she could improve on.

“I never saw any harm in it back then. I had no idea she would try to use the footage against me. Baby, that was a skit from a movie she was trying to get a part in. We had been at it for hours. I was tired from practice and she pounced and begged for me to help her as soon as I crawled into bed for a nap.

“I knew those lines by heart by the time she started to tape. That was not a conversation between lovers. It was a boyfriend helping his girlfriend run lines. You are the woman I love,” I place a gentle kiss to her lips. “You are the only woman I want. I have never lied to you Tamara and I don’t plan on starting now. I have a buddy that actually worked that audition. I plan to call him and see if he can send me the script and Tiffany’s audition tape so that you can see I’m telling the truth.”

She eyes me warily as her tears continue to fall. I move my hands to her waist and pull her to me, kissing her passionately, trying to show her how I feel with my lips. To my relief she doesn’t pull away. Her arms lock around my neck and I groan in relief.

I need to make her understand what she means to me. I pull away and hold a finger up. I pull my phone out to text Trevor to let everyone know I have found her and then I text security to have them make sure we are not disturbed in this barn.

I tuck my phone away and reach for her hand. I pull her along down a few stalls to an empty one. I grab one of the blankets we keep in the stable. Once inside the stall I lay out the blanket before lowering to it and tugging Tam down into my lap. She straddles my hips and I cup her face.

“I love you, Tam,” I say as I swipe at her tears. I place a soft kiss to her trembling lips. “You are everything to me.”

I kiss her again to fuse my words into her brain. I place my forehead to hers as my hands make their way slowly down her face, to her throat, letting my fingertips trail across her collarbone. I feel her shiver and go to pull the blanket she is wrapped in tighter around her, but she shrugs out of the blanket and scoots forward in my lap. Her arms wrap my head, her fingers diving into my hair as her lips meet mine. I groan as I taste our tears mixed together.

I reach to continue my exploration of her body. I run my fingers across her shoulders catching the straps to her dress and pulling them with me as I move my fingers down her arms. I gently move one hand to the zipper at the back of her dress and release it nice and slow. I want her to have time to process each touch and what I am conveying with each one.