An Unlocked Mind (Secrets #2)(64)

“N-no,” Rob stammered, his breathing quickening with each sensual kiss.

“It’s like someone rubbing your prostate from the outside. Feels amazing.” Vic pulled back a little. “Maybe you need to experience this for yourself.” And before Rob could say a word, Vic shifted back, his hands on Rob’s thighs as he pushed them apart, until Rob lay there, more exposed than he’d ever been in his life.

“Shove a pillow under you,” Vic said suddenly. “Lift your arse higher.”

Rob grabbed for the nearest pillow, his fingers coming into contact with a couple of smooth foil squares. He glanced at them, frowning. “Why do we need condoms?”

Vic stilled. “What do you mean, why do we need condoms?”

Rob shrugged. “I never used them.”

Vic’s eyes widened. “Why the hell not?”

Just like that, the atmosphere changed. It was like a frost had crept in through the open window. And Rob knew it was his doing.

“Jamie said they didn’t feel natural. He said there was nothing like sliding in raw.” When Vic gaped at him, Rob set his jaw. “What?” he asked defensively.

“Okay, you know what? Every pearl of wisdom Jamie ever shared with you? Forget it. It never happened, because things like that are apt to get you into a world of trouble.”

Rob frowned. “How?”

Vic sat back on his haunches. “How? Really? So all these girls you fucked… they let you do it without condoms?” When Rob nodded, Vic shook his head. “You…. Oh my God, Rob! You’re lucky you didn’t end up with a disease or a pregnant girl.”

“They all said they took precautions.”

Vic opened his mouth to say something, then shut it. He rubbed his hand over his head. “I’m sorry. I keep forgetting, you’re not gay.”

“What does that have to do with it?” Rob was lost.

Vic arched his eyebrows. “Even at twenty-four, you have to know what HIV is.”

“Of course.” Rob bristled slightly. “I’m not stupid.”

Vic sighed. “No, you’re not—appearances to the contrary. But growing up as a gay man means there are certain rules I live by. Things other gay men have learned the hard way. And one of the most important of those rules is that, no matter who you’re with, unless it’s a loving and committed relationship, you do not go bareback.” He met Rob’s gaze. “Times change, preventative methods change with them, and there are meds out there that may have changed gay sex forever, things you might not know about….” He paused, his expression thoughtful. “Condoms are more than a means of preventing pregnancy, okay? STIs, HIV…. And that leads me to the other important rule.”

“Which is?” Rob felt like an idiot.

“We get tested, regularly. We never put anyone at risk.”

The skin on Rob’s arms prickled as the hairs stood on end. “Have you ever… I mean, have you ever been in a relationship where you….” He couldn’t explain the mood that had just crept over him. The thought of Vic and some other guy being so close, so… connected that they fucked without protection made him ache inside.

Vic regarded him steadily. “No, I haven’t.” Something flashed across his face, something Rob couldn’t get a handle on. “Maybe one day.”

Slowly Rob sat up and put his head in his hands. “I fucked this up, didn’t I?”

The mattress dipped, and then strong arms wound their way around him, pulling him upright. Vic whispered in his ear. “No, but you killed the mood a bit. Look at it this way: at least you didn’t go as far as kicking a puppy, right?”

Rob chuckled, unable to help himself.

“So how about we get dressed and then go downstairs to make some dinner? Together?”

He nodded. “Dinner sounds good.” He couldn’t shift the idea that he’d just ruined whatever was brewing between him and Vic.

Then Vic kissed him on the lips, a slow, thorough kiss that made him tingle inside. “And just so we’re clear? This is a postponement.” His hands were warm and gentle on Rob’s back.

“Promise?” Rob gazed into gray eyes that held nothing but kindness.

Vic smiled. “Promise.”





Chapter Nineteen


VIC WAS feeling very content. Dinner was over, the couch was comfy, and Rob was beside him, leaning against him, watching a film on TV.

This close proximity was new, but Vic wasn’t complaining. It felt good to have him close enough that Vic could feel the heat of Rob’s body through his thin sweatpants and T-shirt. He couldn’t help but be relieved too. Rob had been quiet through dinner, and Vic guessed their earlier conversation was still on his mind.

At least he’s not sitting at the opposite end of the couch. That would definitely have been a step backward. Maybe the conversation had cleared up a few things. This had to be a giant learning curve for Rob, but it was better to let him know certain facts sooner rather than later.

Vic did feel for him, however. Blue balls were never fun.

Not that I intend him to suffer them for long. The condom and packet of lube were burning a hole in his jeans pocket, and Vic was in let’s-wait-and-see mode. Rob wasn’t the only one with blue balls.

He shut out the film and brought up an image in his mind: Rob, naked on his bed, legs spread, slowly pulling on that pretty cock, waiting for him….