Absolutely Unforgivable(99)
My father looked at me, seemingly confused by what I was telling him. I shrugged. “It kind of came out on the Ellen show. We didn’t plan it to happen that way but it’s out there now and we can’t exactly take it back.”
“How ...” he started to say but then my older sister Sarah jumped it.
“Seriously? That’s what you want to know, how she got pregnant? I would think that was the one part of the story that was obvious.” She pointed to Billy and continued. “Her rock star boyfriend knocked her up.”
“Okay, that’s enough of that,” my mother said as she got up from the table and started clearing the plates.
“Well, son, I guess the only thing left to say is welcome to the family.” My father put his hand on Billy’s shoulder and stuck his other hand out to shake Billy’s. I’m sure he was still worried about his baby girl, but at the same time, what could he really do? Billy was going to be part of my life from now on and I was glad my father finally accepted it, or at least was trying to.
On Christmas Day when the news broke about our pregnancy I was a little worried people would figure out where we were and bother us. But they didn’t. Even my parents’ neighbors who knew we were there didn’t. Billy and I had a truly peaceful vacation -- while back at home things were exploding.
Vin, Devin, and Rocco hopped a flight and came to gather us. I didn’t want to leave the safety and comfort of my family but Vin insisted he had to get us home. Vin was worried that he couldn’t contain the crowds around the house much longer and if we didn’t show up soon to make some kind of statement they might storm the house and burn it down. I was pretty sure he was overreacting; but still I knew eventually we were going to have to deal with all that.
When we got home we could barely get our car into the driveway. There were so many people waiting on our arrival. Once we were safely inside and the gate securely shut behind us, Billy and I stepped out of the car to address the fans. Billy thanked them all for coming by and then reminded them that it was Christmas and that they should be home with their families.
As he said that a young girl shouted, “I love you Billy!”
I laughed and so did others from the crowd. Billy continued speaking and again thanked them all for their love and support. He confirmed that I was with child but that it was still too soon to know if it was going to be a girl or a boy yet. He told them what I needed now more than anything was rest and that he asked them to please give me that.
He put his hand on my stomach and said, “This is my baby in here. I need to keep it safe. I’m sure you all understand that, right?”
Billy and I went inside the house after that and for the most part the crowds dispersed.
The record label agreed to let the band work on their album in Billy’s studio at the house. It was either that or Billy wasn’t going to sign off on the deal. He didn’t want to leave my side for even a moment. He went to every doctor’s appointment and spent a lot of time setting up the room for the baby, which was actually a new addition to the house. He wanted the baby’s room downstairs near us and that worked for me since Vin, Rocco, and Devin had pretty much claimed upstairs for themselves. Plus, I wanted my baby near me too.
Just before Valentine’s Day, I had an appointment to get an ultrasound. This was the big reveal. If all went well then Billy and I would know the sex of our baby. As a girl who grew up with all sisters part of me really wanted it to be a girl but then again I would love to have a little mini-Billy. He would be so adorable. I was so torn. I guess really all that matters is that baby is healthy.
I was really nervous leading up to the big day; but when it had finally arrived Billy helped me to stay focused on him by talking about potential baby names, so that I would not have the full blown panic attack I knew was coming on.
“I was thinking, if it’s a girl maybe we could name her after my mother, Nicole.”
“Billy, that’s a beautiful name. Of course we can name her after your mother.”
Billy looked off in the distance and smiled at a memory he seemed to be having about a time he had spent with his mother as a child. Then, a look of sadness crossed his face as he contemplated yet another memory, one that clearly wasn’t as joyous as the first. "You know, I used to have a sister. A twin sister.”
I gasped at hearing this news, I truly had no idea. I turned my body towards his and laid my hand on his wrist that was comfortably on the armrest of the chair he was sitting in. His eyes glistened with tears. “She died when we were younger. She got sick and just never got better.” His voice had a haunting sadness about it.