A Winter Wedding(106)
“You’re forcing me to choose between Kyle and my career?”
He offered no apologies. “Do you need time to think it over? Or do you know what you want?”
She wanted what every musician wanted. She wanted to be on top, in demand, out with a new album every year that was more popular than the one before. Music was her life, and after everything she’d been through in the past twelve months, she was terrified she wouldn’t be able to earn a living without Derrick. He had the experience, knew all the right people. He could navigate the industry better than anyone. She wasn’t even certain she could get another manager, not while she was in her current situation. It was Derrick’s romantic interest that made him willing to keep trying with her.
“I can’t promise anything.”
“All I’m asking is that you keep an open mind and give me a chance to prove my love.”
She drew a deep breath. What would it matter, if she and Kyle didn’t really have a chance, anyway? “Then let’s record the song.”
29
Christmas dawned bleak and cold, with snow flurries and an overcast sky. Kyle supposed most people would appreciate a white Christmas, but the weather did little to cheer him up. He drove over to Morgan’s house, as well as the homes of his other employees, to deliver their Christmas bonuses. Then he returned to his empty house, sat by the tree and listened to all of Lourdes’s albums—even the pop songs.
Riley had already started work on the plant and was hurrying to get the bulk of it done before the wedding. He said the subcontractors could finish the rest once he left on his honeymoon, so Kyle would be able to move back into his office the day after New Year’s and restart production. That was good news. Kyle tried to encourage himself by being grateful for that and anticipating how much better things would be when he could get to work in earnest.
But no matter what he tried to tell himself, there was no remedy for the gaping hole Lourdes had left in his life.
“Stop it! You only knew her for three weeks,” he grumbled. “You’re being ridiculous.”
Still, ridiculous or not, she was all he could think about. He picked up his phone and stared at it. He was dying to call her, to hear how she was doing and what was happening with the songs she was writing for her next album. He was even curious about what was going on with Derrick.
But he didn’t want to intrude on her life. He of all people understood how miserable it was when an old flame tried to hang on. He’d told Lourdes he loved her. He’d offered her a ring, a ring he hadn’t returned, which was pretty pathetic and further proof of his complete devotion.
“She knows what she’s walking away from,” he muttered. And he couldn’t blame her for leaving. She was so talented. She deserved to soar as high as she could in the music world. Nothing he had to give her could compete with fame and fortune, and it didn’t help that he’d known this all along.
He was about to allow himself to text her, just a simple “Merry Christmas,” when Brandon called.
With a sigh of relief, he answered his cell.
“Hey, where are you?” Brandon asked.
Kyle stiffened in surprise. Christmas dinner wasn’t for three more hours. “I’m at home. Where are you?”
“In the car, driving over to play football at the high school. It’ll be a cold, muddy mess, but I can’t think of anything that’ll be more fun. Didn’t you get my message?”
Kyle remembered seeing something come in; he’d been using his GPS to find the homes he had to visit to deliver those Christmas bonuses and had forgotten to go back to it. “Sorry. Missed it. I was busy.”
“No problem. Some of my old school friends are in town for the holidays and they put this game together. Ted and Noah and the others won’t be there, but I’d love it if you’d come.”
Kyle frowned at the Christmas tree he’d chopped down for Lourdes. He wasn’t doing much of anything except torturing himself, so why not? “I’m on my way.”
As soon as he disconnected, Kyle went back to the screen where he’d written “Merry Christmas,” but before he could hit Send, he realized that the greatest gift he could give Lourdes, since she’d chosen a different path for her life, was to let her go.
So he deleted it.
*
Lourdes was sitting on the couch at her mother’s house, smelling the wonderful aromas coming from the kitchen while strumming the song she’d written for Kyle. The melody of “Refuge” went through her mind all the time, which made it even more impossible to forget him.
“Oh, who am I kidding?” she muttered under her breath. She couldn’t have forgotten him, anyway.
With a sigh, she put her guitar on the floor so that she could lie down. She’d been so tired since she’d come home, had almost no energy...
She’d barely closed her eyes when her sisters came out of the bathroom, still arguing about which one had purchased a certain eye shadow, something Lourdes had been trying to tune out.
“Lourdes, you can’t go to sleep,” Mindy said as soon as she spotted her curled up on her side. “The cousins will be here any minute. They flew all the way from Florida to see you, and you haven’t even changed.”
She lifted her heavy eyelids. “They’re coming to see all of us.”