A Walk Along the Beach(80)

“Don’t play games with me, Sean. I know you were the one who paid my December rent for Bean There.”

His eyes narrowed. “I didn’t.”

“Don’t lie to me…You’re the only one I told, and I immediately regretted it. I regret it even more now.”

“Willa, please, listen to me. You can be as angry as you want, but I’m telling you the truth.” His gaze dared me to defy him. “The truth is I considered it, but I had no way of knowing who your landlord is or how to get in touch. Besides, I knew you wouldn’t want that from me.”

He sounded sincere. I blinked, unsure what to believe.

“I want to help. I do. And I would if I didn’t believe you’d think I was looking for a way to buy back your favor.”

That was exactly what I’d thought.

We stood, staring at each other. “Okay, fine, but if it wasn’t you, then who was it?”

Sean’s look grew thoughtful. “You may have mentioned it to me in passing, but your family must have known. The shop hasn’t been open in nearly a month. It wouldn’t take much for someone in town to put two and two together.”

    Dad knew my circumstances. I remembered him telling me he’d put a bit of money aside. Dad was friends with Lewis Johnson, my landlord. It could only have been my father. Lucas and Chantelle might have contributed, too.

The awareness must have shown in my eyes, because Sean took hold of both of my shoulders and held me at arm’s length. “Don’t you have any idea of how much you’re loved? Bean There is part of the fabric of this community. No one wants you to lose your business, least of all me.”

I snickered. “You don’t even like coffee.”

“True, but I’m crazy about the woman who brews it.”

That was the last thing I wanted to hear, especially from him.

As if he could read my mind, Sean added, “Give me another chance, Willa. Let me show you how important you are to me. I’ve been heartsick knowing how badly I failed you.”

Being unnecessarily cruel to Sean or anyone went against my nature. “I appreciate what you’re saying; I know you’re sincere and I wish things could be different for us, I really do. It would be easy to love you, but I can’t let that happen.”

“Why? Because I wasn’t with you when Harper was sick?”

“No,” I said, keeping the emotion out of my voice, although it was difficult. “It isn’t only that you were gone when my life was falling apart. It’s because I know I will never be able to count on you. You’re married to your career.

“You are who you are,” I continued, “and I won’t ask you to change. Your work is your life, your mistress. You love it and the risks that go along with it. In the short time I’ve known you, think about all the chances you’ve taken. Our relationship isn’t working for me. I’m sorry, I truly am.”

    “But—”

“It would be best if we didn’t see each other again, Sean. I wish it could be different.”

I could see Sean struggling, wanting to argue. He opened his mouth, but when he saw the determined look in my eyes, he closed it again.

Knowing this would likely be the last time I’d see him outside of Bean There or around town, I leaned forward and kissed his cheek. “Thank you,” I said, and moved back one step.

He continued to stare at me as I headed for the front door. I was on my way out when he stopped me.

“Willa,” he said with a tenderness I didn’t expect, “don’t make the mistake of turning away from love. We have our differences, but we can work past them if you’ll give me another chance.”

I hesitated and then sadly shook my head. After burying my sister, I couldn’t face losing someone else I loved. Making an emotional investment in Sean was too much for me.

As if reading my mind, he added, “Loving someone, anyone, including me, will always involve some risk. I love you. I have almost from the first moment we met. It’s crazy how long it took me to work up the courage to tell you.

“You shook my world. You still do. One day, and I pray it will be soon, you’ll realize that love is worth the cost. Otherwise, I fear you’ll end up alone and bitter, thinking about all that you missed out on in life.”

“That’s my choice,” I reminded him.

“It is,” he said, walking me to the door. “Choose wisely, my love.”

Stepping out into the wind and rain, a chill came over me. Ignoring it, I walked to where I’d left my car, the harsh weather beating down against me.



* * *



—

    I connected with Shirley, who I’d spoken to only briefly since I’d moved back into town. I told her I planned to open again on Thursday morning. It would take that long to complete an inventory and purchase what I’d need to get back up and running. I would serve only what I could order in quickly or bake myself. The coffee beans had to be freshly roasted and of the highest quality. No one brewed a better cup of java than Bean There, and I was determined it would stay that way.

As soon as Shirley learned I was opening my doors once again, she stopped by the shop. “Thank the good Lord,” she squealed, hugging me hard enough to crack a rib.