Wretched (Never After Series)(68)

Sadness weaves its way through me, and although it’s hard, it feels oddly cathartic too, as if deep underground chains are snapping from my body, freeing me from the constraint the blood in my veins and my last name have always caused.

“No matter where I go in life, Nessa, no matter who I love and lose…. I think I’ll always miss you the most.”

Smacking a kiss to the palm of my hand, I press it to her tombstone before backing up and walking away, leaving a single poppy flower at the base of her grave.

I head straight back to the estate, bypassing the main entrance and walking around to the back, going to the cottage instead. Honestly, I don’t plan on staying after everything is destroyed, but in the meantime I can’t stand to see the faces of people who never really cared.

Zeke is sitting on the patio, leaned back in a chair, cigarette smoke billowing in the air around him. And in all of my grief, all of my sadness, I had forgotten a major detail from the other night.

Zeke’s name was mentioned in a room of federal agents.

I squint my eyes, walking up to him as he looks over at me, then back up at the sky.

“Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t kill you, Ezekiel.”

He pauses, the cigarette halfway to his mouth. “They told me you found out, you know? Called me last night, trying to convince me to leave. Witness protection or some bullshit.”

“So why didn’t you?” I slip my hand beneath my skirt, pulling my gun from the holster and resting it on the patio table.

I expected to feel angrier with him, but I guess when I let go of the Westerly name and its importance, the people who betrayed the name start to matter less. Still, it stings knowing he was throwing me under the bus and not caring where I landed.

“How could you?”

He sighs, sitting forward in the chair, looking at me for the first time. “They didn’t give me a choice.”

“There’s always a choice.”

“You know what happened to my father when he went to prison? He turned into someone’s bitch and then was mutilated and hung from the rafters. He still gets mocked to this day.” He shakes his head. “You think I want to end up like that? I’ve been forced to live a life like him. I don’t want to die like him too.”

“So you made a deal,” I add.

He nods. “So I made a deal.”

I tap my fingers on the top of my Eagle. “You know, you’re really nothing but a coward.”

Smoke billows from his nostrils. “You’re right. I am. And it fuckin’ terrifies me. I lived my whole life lookin’ up to my dad. He was it, a god to me. And he’d be disgusted by who I’ve become… But I am who I am.”

I don’t respond, not having it in me to fight. And while the betrayal is still there, I understand living in your father’s shadow and wanting to break free. I can’t begrudge him that, as much as I might wish to.

“Are you going to kill me?” he asks when I stand up and grab my gun.

“No,” I sigh. “But I never want to see you again. Living with the shame of knowing you’ll never be half the man your father was is more painful than any torture I could offer.” Moving around the table, I stop in front of him. “One day, Ezekiel, I hope you find your peace.”

“I don’t deserve your empathy,” he whispers, staring down at his lap.

I swallow around the knot in my throat. “No… you don’t. But I’m giving it to you anyway.”

Re-holstering my gun, I walk past him and into the woods. Who cares if he sees where I’m going at this point.





38





EVELINE





I spent three hours setting up the space before texting my sister and asking her to meet me here, so I could “show her the ropes,” since I blew her off yesterday. I’m going to enjoy watching her die.

My legs are crossed and my eyes closed as I sit calmly in the center of the hallway, directly outside the greenhouse door. The small pitter-patter of feet walking down the hidden closet’s staircase makes my ears perk up, excitement tingling down my spine. I’ve been waiting years for this moment.

I peel my eyes open, grinning as I look up at her. “Hello, Dorothy.”

“What are you doing?” she glances around. “Where’s Dad?”

“He’ll be here,” I say calmly, standing up. I move toward the door to press my fingerprint on the scanner, but Dorothy beats me to it. The light turns green, everything unlocking. My forehead wrinkles, realizing Cody must not have been able to hack into the system yet.

Not that it matters anymore.

She traipses into the greenhouse, her nose scrunching up as she looks at all of the poppies. “You know, for beautiful flowers, they really don’t smell that good, do they?”

“Subjective, I guess.” I murmur, my black skirt swishing as I move past her. “This way.”

I lead her down the two acres of flowers, flourishing in their various stages, and to the lab in the back, flicking on the lights and making my way to the metal table in the center of the room where my chemistry set is. I already have everything prepared.

“Wow, this is… intense,” she muses as she walks around, her eyeball magnified as she stares through a beaker.