Wolf Rain (Psy-Changeling Trinity #3)(44)

With that, the twins were gone.

Memory wanted to cry—Ashaya’s mental presence was as warm and as giving as her sister’s was cold and inhuman. Ashaya loved Amara with all of her being while understanding that Amara was incapable of loving her back.

Swallowing the lump in her throat, she rubbed her hands down the front of her thighs. And somehow, she found herself leaning against Alexei’s body. He didn’t push her away, didn’t tell her that she didn’t have the right to those skin privileges. He also still had his hand on her nape, but his silence cut at her. Did he think her a monster now?

Then he dropped an energy bar in her lap and growled, “Eat!”

Releasing a breath she hadn’t been aware of holding, Memory picked up the bar that was meant to be infused with all types of minerals and vitamins. Grouchy growly wolf, she thought as she took a bite, her heart all tight and happy.

It was Sascha who spoke next. Dropping her face into her hands, the cardinal exhaled with force. When she looked up, her eyes were obsidian. “I refuse to believe that your ability to reach psychopathic individuals is only so that those individuals can become better psychopaths.” A mutinous set to her jaw. “You are a gift, Memory. A remarkable E.”

When Sascha held out a hand, Memory didn’t hesitate to take it. Not only had the empath only ever been kind, Memory had the feeling Sascha didn’t need physical contact to divine emotions; her power was a storm. How foolish the world had been to believe her a broken cardinal for so many years of her existence.

More empathic cardinals existed now, but Sascha had grown deepest and longest into her power. She had a weight to her psychic presence that was both calming and a little terrifying in its beauty.

“The most pressing concern,” Sascha said after closing her fingers over Memory’s, “is your lack of shielding.” Firm, practical words. “Shields happen to be my specialty and, starting today, we’re going to work on building yours. You should’ve been able to deflect Amara—there’s no reason you have to be open to any psychopath who manages to touch you.”

Memory’s heart thundered.

Careful not to dislodge the warmth of Alexei’s hold, she shifted to fully face Sascha. “Renault was always able to get to me, no matter what.” Memory had tried again and again to build on the foundations of her childhood lessons on the subject, failed each and every time. “No matter what I managed to construct, he tore through it as if it was tissue paper.”

“This man had you since you were a child.” Sascha’s expression was suddenly fierce, and all at once, Memory could see the deadly cardinal who’d struck out at those who’d targeted her cub. “I spotted bad mental bruising during the time you permitted me in your mind. The good news is that it’s begun to heal at the edges—it shows no signs of being a permanent injury.”

Memory’s hand curled as, beside her, Alexei’s body was dangerously motionless. “Is that why my coordination is problematic? When Alexei first found me, I moved much worse than I do now.”

“It’s possible,” Sascha said. “But, given your rapid improvement, it’s also possible the coordination issues were a subconscious rebellion on your part.” The echo of Lucy’s words was welcome, but the cardinal wasn’t done. “The bruises are a surface issue. More dangerous is that I believe your captor created back doors in your mind when you were too young to stop him—they’d give him a shortcut through any shields you had.”

Alexei curled his hand further around Memory’s nape, until his claws touched the front of her throat. “Can you help Memory close those doors?” His voice had a serrated edge, no growl in it, just pure, lethal focus.

Memory didn’t ever want Alexei to direct that predator’s tone at her.

“We have to find them first.” Sascha’s words contained nothing of defeat, only grim determination. “Luckily, we have access to an entire squad of Arrows—the squad knows every trick there is to subvert a mind. It means they know the reverse, too.”

Memory had gone stiff at the mention of Arrows, her hand clenching on her half-eaten energy bar.

“No one will be digging around in your mind,” Sascha said with the acute understanding of an E in full control of her abilities. “Any action taken will be with your full approval and participation.” Eyes filled once more with stars caught Memory’s, their beauty making her chest ache. “I’m lowering my shields. Look into my mind, see that I would never hurt you.”

Memory sucked in a breath. Before she could speak, however, the cardinal dropped her shields. Her power roared out, a tornado that sang with strength that could not be quantified. That was what made a cardinal—they had no ranking on the Gradient.

Gripping the side of her chair, Memory fought to think. “No,” she said. “It’s all right.” She would never violate another mind.

“It isn’t a violation if I invite you in,” Sascha whispered gently, as if she’d read Memory’s thoughts . . . but then an empath didn’t need to do that; Memory’s untutored emotional responses wrote her thoughts in the sky.

“Come.” Sascha smiled. “I welcome you.”

Traveling back a lifetime to when she’d last entered another mind—her mother’s—Memory reached up to grip Alexei’s hand. His claws retracted, his fingers curling firmly around hers. Anchored in his wildness, she took a tiny step beyond Sascha’s public mind. It was more than enough to tell her that the cardinal would never consciously cause her harm.