Unfinished Ex (Calloway Brothers, #2)(39)

“Don’t bother. The damage is done. Besides, I’m still a liar. I’m still the person who left you.”

“Nobody will see it that way once they know the truth, that I’m the one who broke our vows.”

“You don’t get it.” She rubs her necklace thing again. “I’m still the bad guy, Jaxon.”

“No, you aren’t, and I can’t have people—”

“I was pregnant.”

Her words are like a punch to my gut. A knife to my very soul. “You were what?” I try to process what she said. “But you just told me you didn’t cheat.”

“I didn’t.”

The words bounce around in my head, blazing a fiery path all the way through my body. I catapult myself off the couch and circle the room. I stop when realization dawns. I lean over, hands on my knees, trying not to throw up. I peer over at her, hatred I’ve never known spewing from me. “You aborted my baby?”

“Please sit down, Jaxon.”

“It’s a simple yes or no answer, Nicky. Did you kill my fucking child?”

“I need to tell you the whole story.”

My hands grip the hair on either side of my head, almost ripping it from my scalp, mainly to keep myself from launching an attack on her. “There’s a story? Oh, well, if there’s a story behind why you aborted my baby without my knowledge, please do tell. I’m sure I’ll understand how it was best for you.” I walk to my bar cart and open a bottle of whiskey, not even bothering to pour it into a glass.

The backyard momentarily illuminates with flashes of lightening. Heisman jumps onto the couch and presses into Nicky. Goddamn traitor.

“Jaxon.”

I hold up a finger to shut her up. I’m not nearly drunk enough to hear what she has to say. I take two more large swallows, then take the bottle over and sit in the chair opposite the couch—which is way nearer than I want to be to her right now. “Fine. Tell me—did you take pills to kill our kid or use a fucking coat hanger?”

Tears that mean nothing to me stream down her face. The urge to wipe them, to kiss them away, are gone forever with the words she uttered moments ago. Over the past few years, I tried to hate her.

I never could. But now, in this moment, I understand hatred. I thought I hated the McQuaids, but that’s nothing compared to how I feel about her. It’s an all-consuming rage that I feel in every cell of my body. I didn’t even know it was possible to feel this way about another human being. And the only reason she’s still sitting on my couch instead of being pushed out my front door is that I need to hear her tell me. I need her to feel every fucking ounce of my pain so that it will stay with her for the rest of her miserable life.





Chapter Sixteen



Nicky




I know the next few minutes are going to be brutal. It’s never something I was going to tell him.

But tonight has become the night we purge all our secrets. And he deserves to know.

I rub my pendant with one hand and his dog with the other.

“Heisman, come here,” Jaxon demands.

He lifts his head, looks over, then settles back against me.

“Heisman. Come now.”

This time, his furry friend doesn’t move at all.

“As if you haven’t done enough,” Jaxon spouts, “you have to break my goddamn dog, too?”

The lump in my throat is so large that I wonder if I’m even going to be able to speak. “Could I…” I clear my throat. “Could I have a glass of water, please?”

He laughs maniacally. “Oh, sure. Is there anything else I can get you? A cane to whip me with? A gun to put a bullet through my brain?”

I swallow over and over, my throat and eyes burning.

He huffs, gets out of his chair, and goes to the kitchen, coming back with a glass of lukewarm water. I drink, the water hurting as a bolus of it makes its way to my stomach. I put the glass down and blow out a long breath. “I didn’t know I was pregnant until after I got to Oklahoma.”

“And that makes everything—”

“Jaxon, you have to let me tell this. If you keep interrupting, I’ll never get through it.”

I watch as the bottle of whiskey meets his lips.

“I thought it was the stress of leaving you, lying to you, and starting a new job. I knew I hadn’t felt right in many months, but it made sense to me. I’d spent weeks contemplating the job offer before I decided to leave. I felt sick over it. I lost a lot of sleep. So it came as no surprise when I missed a period or two and then had some spotting. Stress can do that to a woman’s cycle. Being pregnant was never on my radar. I was on the pill and took it religiously.”

“Your trusty phone alarm never failed to alert you,” he says malevolently.

“Do you want to hear this or not? Because despite what you might think, this is hard for me, too.”

Even in the dim light, I can see his eyes roll and his head shake from side to side.

“When I finally went to see a doctor, I was informed I was twelve weeks pregnant.”

The whiskey drops to the floor when he bolts from the chair. “Twelve weeks?” He studies the mess and picks up the bottle. “Shit.” He disappears and comes back with a rag.

I’m glad he’s cleaning the floor. It keeps him from glaring at me.