Unexpected Gift(36)
Chapter Sixteen
Molly
The lake is beautiful. The water ripples from the soft breeze blowing, and the grass sways, brushing against other blades of grass. I shut my eyes, feeling peace and calm wash over me as I edit a manuscript. I love my job. I love that I am able to take my work anywhere and be happy. I never liked the idea of working for someone. I wanted to be my own boss and I am. And I make a pretty decent wage off of it.
Don’t get me wrong, it doesn’t compare to the salary of a neurosurgeon, but I still do well for myself. My shoulders sag as I let out a deep breath and glance over at Posie as she sleeps. I have her bundled up in a pink blanket with yellow roses on it. Amelia made it before she died. She always loved knitting and sewing. I brush my finger over the material. This blanket — besides a few photos, and a house full of stuff— will be the only thing left, that Posie will have to remember her mom by. And yeah, a house full of stuff sounds great, but at the end of the day, it’s just stuff. It will never be able to replicate the people the stuff belonged to.
Sure, everyone has stories they can tell her until they are blue in the face, but that will never be enough. She will always be left wondering what her parents were like and it breaks my heart. I’ll never be able to give her what she will crave most out of life. And no one ever will. She will walk around with a hole in her heart, the space reserved for a parents’ love—it will be empty—voided.
“I’m sorry, pretty girl.” I rock her in the car seat. When I came home today, I brought us straight here to the lake. “I’m sorry you won’t be able to know them. They were great you know. Did you know that your daddy proposed to your mommy on the playground, under an oak tree, where mommy pushed daddy off the monkey bars?” She doesn’t move or make a sound. “I know. Your mom could be vicious when she needed to be, but ever since that day, they were together. Not once did they ever break up. Not once did either of them wonder if they were supposed to be together. Well, your mom had a little hiccup on their wedding day, but it wasn’t about not wanting to be with him, she was just nervous. She looked so pretty. I’ll have to show you pictures as you get older.”
My eyes burn with the threat of tears. “They loved you so much. I am so sorry you are stuck with me and Caden.” I rub my finger down her cheek. I turn my head and look beyond the lake. Mountains paint the distance along with a few grey clouds. It might rain. And that means, I need to go inside to make sure Posie stays dry.
I place my laptop in my bag and throw it over my shoulder. I stand from the bench and turn around to see the beautiful, A-frame house staring back at me. Caden has been working nights all week, so all he does is sleep during the day and get up and go to work. It makes it easy to avoid him, since I am avoiding him and all.
The night from the club haunts me. I can’t believe Kenna let me dance with him like that, knowingly. I don’t know how to face Caden because I don’t know how to tell him that I liked it. I loved dancing with him. I loved being in his arms. I felt safe and sexy. I never knew the two could go together so well, but they did, and he makes me feel it without effort.
He tries texting, but I ignore him. Kenna blows up my phone too, but I’m ignoring her too. I’m mad at her, or I think I am, really, I’m just mad at myself for being sucked into Caden’s charm, and my best friend did nothing to stop me. She let it happen. I’m too stubborn to give in so soon. And I know that isn’t the best quality to have, but I am not ready to talk to either of them yet because I might say something I don’t mean. And in order to achieve that, I have to remove myself from the situation.
Honestly, my insides are a mess. I keep thinking of Brandon and how I shouldn’t want Caden, and then I think about how angry I get because I like the infuriating man and I don’t want to like him.
Yet here I am, afraid to go into my own house because if he sees me, he will corner me. And I’m not prepared for that. Call me a coward; I really don’t care. All I know, is as long as I am out here and he is in there, I don’t have to talk to him.
“Come on, Posie. Let’s get inside and get you dinner. Do you know when you go on soft food? Because I have no idea.” I croon at her in my best baby voice. I blow a piece of hair out of my face, annoyed with the damn wind.
I follow the pathway made by stone and wood. The long grass brushes against my ankles, and it makes me feel like something is crawling all over me. Frogs start to croak, and crickets start to sing. All the creatures are starting to come out and speak to one another. It sounds so beautiful. Tonight will be a good night to open my window and let them sing me to sleep.
Stepping onto the porch, I sit Posie down and whip off my cardigan, letting the cool air wrap around my body and cool me down. For such a short hike, I broke a big sweat. I place my hands on my hips and takes in deep breaths of air. “Whew, Posie. I need to start working out. Aunt Molly is out of shape. When did that happen?”
“Maybe it happened during the week you have been ignoring me.”
And there went the wind, right out of my sails.
“Caden, not now, okay?”
“If not now, when? It’s been a week. At least call Kenna. She is worried sick about you, and she won’t stop messaging me. Do you know how time-consuming it is to go through thirty texts when I take five minutes off from work? I don’t even get what you are freaking out about.”