Unexpected Gift(14)
“He threw the best parties.”
Kenna picks some lient off my dress. “That’s where we met Caden.”
I snort, taking a look at myself in the broken mirror. “Where he had his arms around not one, but two women? Gross.”
“If by gross you mean hot...” She snags my coat off the dresser and shoves it at my chest.
“I mean, if that’s your kind of thing.” I shrug on my coat, ignoring the glare she gives me. I always know when she glares. I feel her searing, green-eyed gaze watch me as I cross the room. I sigh, putting on my bracelet. “What?” I stare at her with annoyance.
She puckers her bottom lip and wobbles her head, ignoring the awkward moment. “Nothing. We need to go, though, or else we are going to be late to your own brother’s funeral if we don’t get a move on.”
“Why rush? His grave will be there. Every day. Forever.” The door slams behind me. I run down the stairs, away from the bedroom. Away from Kenna. Just away.
Kenna's footsteps pound down the steps as she runs behind to me. “Sure, but you’d never forgive yourself if you didn’t see him laid to rest.”
I remain silent and take a right out of the staircase to the door. I reach for the handle, but I don’t turn it. My feet are glued to the floor. My body is frozen. I can’t move.
“Molly?”
“Yeah?” My breath quivers as I stare at the handle. It doesn’t turn, no matter how hard I try to bend it to my will.
“You haven’t opened the door.”
“I don’t know if I can.” A tremor quakes through my hand. “I can’t.” One step out that door is one step closer to closing a chapter of my life that I’m not ready to close. I’ll never be ready to bury it.
Her hand lands on top of mine and turns the knob. The lock clicks and the door creaks open ever so slightly. The day inches its way in through the crack, but my feet still won’t move.
“We have to go. I know you don’t want to, but we have to.”
My blood boils at the sound of her words. I fling the door open until it smashes against the wall, leaving a dent from the knob. “Don’t you think I know that?” As if I don’t know that I need to go to my own brother’s funeral. I want to stay in this house, where the last cup he used is still sitting by the sink. A blanket is bunched up on the couch where he or Amelia last used it. There is a load of laundry in the dryer that they never got to take out and fold. Plates are in the sink from the last time they ate.
Everything was used one last time, and they aren’t coming back. The reality of it punches me in the gut, and I pause mid-step on the porch staircase, glancing over my shoulder at the old house Brandon and Amelia love. Well, loved. They wanted to fix it up. He told me it was a little rundown and it just needed some love to bring it back to life. They poured so much of their hearts into this place, and now, our family can barely step foot in it.
My mom refused to get ready here. She and dad got a hotel room instead, while Kenna and I stay at Brandon’s house. Posie stays with my parents. My mom can’t seem to let go of her for a minute. She looks just like Brandon. She has his eyes, cheeks, and classic blonde hair. She is beautiful.
That’s another issue I can't think about right now. We have no idea who gets custody of Posie. We are supposed to be meeting with the lawyers tomorrow to discuss logistics. Tomorrow seems so far away.
A light mist of rain hisses against the trees and grass, creating a sheen of morning dew. This town is beautiful. I can see why they loved it so much. Billings, where we are originally from, isn’t like this, even though it's only a few hours away. It is much busier and bigger, and not at all quiet or peaceful like it is here.
A tickle on my arm makes me look down to see a bead of rain run down my forearm to my hand. I knew it was supposed to rain this morning, but I didn’t bother with an umbrella. My face will be wet from all the tears anyway, so what’s the point?
Kenna’s hand lands on my back and pushes me forward, telling me silently that we need to get a move on. I put one foot in front of the other until we reach the car. I take one final breath as I open the door and sit in the passenger seat. This is it. In fifteen minutes, I’ll be burying my brother and his wife. Posie will not understand what happened, and she won’t be able to remember her parents or this moment because of her age. Is it said that I’m jealous? I wish I can forget it. Remembering this for the rest of my life seems like a punishment.
“Ready?” Kenna starts the car, not waiting for me to answer. The wheels roll as she reverses out of the driveway, leaving behind an old house where two people used to make memories.
The side mirror reads ‘Objects are closer than they appear.’ and it is misleading. The house does not seem closer. Nothing does. Everything becomes a distant memory the closer we get to the cemetery.
I blink when the car jerks to a stop. Has it been ten minutes already? We are already here. A cloud of black moves across the graveyard to the chairs surrounding the area of the caskets. The dark movement is a crowd of people and it makes the cemetery look more depressing than it already is.
Kenna opens her door first and steps out. I watch the crowd gather and build for my family to pay their respects, and I find myself unable to move again. I can’t breathe. The cold air and rain are light to the touch as they hit the skin of my arm. I rip my eyes from the windshield to Kenna, who patiently waits for me to get out.