To Love and Be Loved(70)

‘Oh, get a room, you two!’ Bella mimed retching.

‘We have got a room, but it’s got two single beds in it and a selection of dolls staring at us, not to mention Ben within five feet with an axe close to hand . . .’ Miguel pulled a face.

‘Half your luck, I share a room with a fidgety baby who snores like a drunk and who wakes up demanding food every couple of hours!’

‘Sounds a lot like Miguel.’ Merrin laughed, her eyes fixed on the newly-weds, as Miguel went to grab his jacket so they could leave. ‘And no, Bells, don’t be so bloody stupid! Me and Jarv were just kids; I never had feelings for him and I don’t want it mentioned again. But then there’s lots I don’t want mentioning, which seems like too much to ask in Port bloody Charles!’

Bella stared at her, as if a little taken aback and a whole lot lost for words. This kind of outburst was rare for her and Merrin felt sapped by it, as if the emotionally tiring day was finally catching up with her.

Bella stepped forward and placed her hand on her arm. ‘Are you all right, my love?’

‘God! For the last time today! I’m fine! Absolutely fine!’

Bella leant in and kissed her cheek. ‘You’re not the only one who’s found today tough. I thought Luuk and I might get married, and look how that’s turned out. I miss him.’ She bit her bottom lip and swiped the tears that filled her eyes. ‘But life goes on, Merry, it has to.’

‘It does, my darlin’.’ She regretted snapping at her wonderful friend, who had her own shit to deal with. ‘And for what it’s worth, if the Flying Dutchman doesn’t know how fabulous you are, then he isn’t worth losing a moment’s sleep over. Love you.’

‘I know. Love you too.’ Bella wiped the remainder of her lipstick from her mouth on the back of her hand.

Merrin turned on her heel, keen to get some fresh air. It had been a pretty wedding, a fabulous day and Ruby was in her element, but in truth she couldn’t wait to get in the car and drive back to Thornbury, away from the Port Charles gossip, the sharp winds that blew inland, her family’s well-meaning, challenging stares and Miguel’s apparent inability to pace his booze intake. His overindulgence had, according to reports from her dad and Robin, led to him vomiting over the harbour wall on his way home from the Old Boat Shed the previous night. She cringed at this image of him. It was not the Miguel she knew and loved, preferring the sedate version of him who turned up to work every day looking sharp.

She thought about Bella’s words and considered the possibility that she might indeed be treading water. If there was the smallest chance it was true, it threw up two questions – first, what did that say about her? And second, what the hell was she going to do about it?





CHAPTER EIGHTEEN


MIGUEL

Vera Wilma Brown was loaded up and ready to head off. Miguel slammed the boot shut and watched Merrin hold her mum tight in a drawn-out goodbye that felt like an intrusion to watch, before kissing her sister briefly on the cheek. It warmed him to see the displays of love so freely offered and put a pang of regret in his stomach that his own family was not that close or that demonstrative. He would have liked it.

‘Goodbye from me, Mrs Cardy!’ Ruby shouted, giggling at the novelty, and Bella howled her laughter as she stood with baby Glynn in her arms. He watched as she and Merrin, who was, if anything, a little subdued, held each other tearfully – this despite the lingering party atmosphere from the previous day’s wedding.

Ben walked forward and reached for Miguel’s hand, shaking it vigorously. ‘What a weekend, eh? One we won’t forget in a hurry!’

‘My liver certainly won’t!’ He winced at the memory of the hangover, one of the worst he’d ever had. ‘Thank you for your hospitality, it’s been incredible.’

‘You take good care of her.’ Ben pointed at him, smiling, but his finger was ramrod straight and almost in his chest.

‘I will. Although she’s keen to remind me that she can look after herself.’

‘Don’t make me get that axe now!’

Miguel laughed, wondering who had let him in on the joke.

‘And don’t always believe her, Miguel. She thinks she can look after herself but she’s made of glass as well as steel.’ Ben held his eyeline.

With Merrin preoccupied in goodbyes, Miguel coughed to clear his throat and did his best to control the tremor in his voice. ‘I do . . . I . . .’

‘Spit it out, boy!’ Ben slapped his back.

‘I guess I just wanted to say, to reassure you . . .’ His gut flipped with nerves.

‘Sweet Lord.’ Ben patted his pockets, as if looking for his wallet. ‘It’s not money you’re after, is it? Because I’m a little short after this weekend’s knees-up!’

Miguel ignored the joke.

‘I . . . I love . . . I love Merrin,’ he stuttered. ‘That’s all I wanted to say. So you don’t need to get your axe, because I do, I love and respect her.’

‘Well, that makes two of us.’ Ben smiled at him. ‘All I can say is that she’s got a good head on her shoulders, always has had. But she’s not as strong as she thinks she is.’ He paused and looked over at Merrin, who was crouching low and kissing baby Glynn on the cheek. ‘I’d prefer to keep her close; she’s my little girl. Always will be. But I like to think she can rely on you, Miguel. But make no mistake, she’s her own person and knows her own mind. I just want her to be happy, that’s all I’ve ever wanted.’