The Things I Know(30)

‘Well,’ she whispered, for fear of giving in to the rising bubble of joy in her gut and whooping out loud, ‘knowing that makes me feel happy too.’

She liked the way he spoke so candidly, and the soft, nervous manner in which he did so made the words entirely believable.

‘And how would you like your eggs today, Mr Potts?’

‘I don’t mind. At home I have a boiled egg.’

‘A boiled egg it is then. The girls have laid especially for you today.’

‘That was very kind of them.’ He nodded and reached for his cup of tea. ‘I do like eggs, but I always feel a little bit guilty about eating them.’

‘Guilty? Why?’

He took a sip of tea and placed the cup back in the saucer. ‘Well, it’s all the chickens’ work, isn’t it? And a lot of effort, I should imagine. That little oval, carrying all their hopes and plans for the future, wishes for a family, maybe – they probably want chicks.’

‘But it’s not! They’re just eggs. There’s no cockerel. They can’t ever be chicks.’

Grayson nodded. ‘Yes, I know that, of course, but I don’t know if the chickens do. It feels like cheating them a bit.’

She laughed. ‘I don’t suppose they do know that, and it’s nice you’re thinking about all the work they do. I know they’d appreciate your consideration.’ She made a note to relay this to the girls. ‘Would you like some bacon too? And toast?’

‘Thank you, yes, please.’

Hitch sang as she took extra care preparing the breakfast before waltzing back into the dining room with the loaded plate.

‘Can I sit with you? Would that be okay?’ She sounded a little sheepish as she put his breakfast plate in front of him, remembering his preference to eat alone, but she didn’t want to waste a second of his company.

‘I would really like that.’

She watched with fascination as he picked up the knife and gave an expert tap to the top of the egg, before spooning out the little dome of perfection within. Sprinkling the mound with a few grains of salt, he paused before bringing it to his mouth. It was a very particular way of eating, almost a performance.

‘You’ve done that before.’

‘Once or twice.’ He smiled at her and ate the top of his egg. She found it nice to sit and chat, able to think of things to say and not at all tongue-tied, here in this room, where her family history dripped from the walls and pooled in puddles of nostalgia on the flagstone floor. He followed her gaze up over the black-and-white photographs in wooden frames that lined the shelves and windowsill, and the ornaments from a bygone era sitting polished on the mantelpiece.

‘This is a very grand room.’ He took a bite of his toast.

‘I suppose so. I’m used to it. It’s a bit dark. I think it could do with brightening up, but that’s not up to me.’

‘Where I live isn’t nearly so solid. I can see how a man could feel settled here, unafraid for the future. Everything feels safe and permanent.’

‘Too permanent sometimes.’ She let this trail.

‘It’s as though I’m in another world and I’m another person – and I like the person I am here.’

‘Me too,’ she whispered. ‘I like him very much.’

The sound of her dad’s whistling filled the kitchen on the other side of the door. Grayson coughed and she sat up straight.

‘What time are you leaving to go into Bristol? There are buses that leave from the village – I can drop you up there. Or we can call you a cab, or if Pops is going into town I know he’d be happy to take you, if I asked him. If you can put up with his whistling.’

‘Thank you, Thomasina, but I’m not going into Bristol.’

‘You’re not going?’ She laid her forearms flat on the table and stared at him.

‘No.’ He took another sip of his tea. ‘There’s a lady called Liz at the bank where I work. She’s really nice, very good at her job. We have cubicles that are next to each other and she told me that I should do more of what makes me happy and less of what people expect of me. I didn’t really know what she meant until I woke up this morning and I knew that I didn’t want to go and talk at a seminar. I want to spend the day with you. My last day, really. I go back to London just after lunchtime tomorrow and so I want to spend today with you, if that’s okay?’

‘It is okay.’ She smiled. ‘I can take a bit of time.’

‘Good.’

‘But won’t you get into trouble?’

He seemed to consider this. ‘I probably will, but if the seminar’s finished, what can they do? It’ll be done. Over. Plus, I’ve never done anything to get into trouble before, never caused even a tiny ripple. A lot of my colleagues come in and sleep off hangovers, take sick days, leave early, but not me. I work hard, and I can’t explain why I think it’s okay, but I don’t want to waste today in a seminar, trying and failing to teach others how to do my trick. I want to be with you. It feels more important.’

‘It does?’

‘Yes.’

His simple words were like food that filled her up and sustained her. He wanted to be with her and that made her feel very important indeed.

‘I suppose you could lie to them and say you have a tummy bug or the car broke down or something.’