The Summer of Sunshine and Margot(97)
“I guess not.” Margot sighed. “I blame our mother.”
“I do, too, but seeing as she died and, before that, neither of us had seen her since we were toddlers, it’s not particularly helpful. Although you should probably tell Alec you love him.”
“Why?”
“Because falling for someone who isn’t Dietrich is a really big step and acknowledging your feelings sends a message to the universe.”
“I’d rather win his heart,” she muttered, then tilted her head. “Wait. Should I want to win his heart? Or should he offer his heart? Are there rules for any of this?”
“Again, asking the wrong person.”
“We’re hopeless,” Margot said with a sigh.
“Yes, but we look good and seriously, what else matters?”
Chapter Twenty-Four
The following Saturday morning, Sunshine headed for Santa Monica. It was early—barely after seven. Morning fog had rolled in so she knew the beach would be deserted and the sidewalks empty. No one purposefully went to the beach on a foggy morning—except her.
She had a plan—she was going to have breakfast at a cute little coffee shop she’d always liked, read the paper, then walk on the beach. Today was going to be about relaxing and recharging. Not that her schedule was especially difficult, but a little “me time” was always welcome. Plus, Declan was leaving on a business trip and would be gone about ten days. While he was away, she would be on Connor duty 24-7.
She exited the freeway and quickly found parking. She walked into the coffee shop and was immediately seated at a small table by the window. She glanced at the menu to see if it was as she remembered and saw nothing had changed. Her California Scramble was still front and center. The kids’ section was also the same.
Her gaze dropped to the smiling cartoon zoo animals in the margin and lingered on the second item from the bottom: Pancake-orama. The twins had always loved that breakfast, one with blueberries and one with bananas. How many Sunday mornings had she and the twins walked over to have breakfast while their parents slept in? Parents with high-powered careers and little time for or interest in their daughters.
Sunshine had done her best with the girls, right up until she met a guy on a motorcycle who had offered to take her to Texas and teach her to rope a steer. A couple of drinks, a good time in bed and before she’d thought things through, she’d quit her job and she’d been gone.
She’d left with almost no warning, texting Elle, the twins’ mother, who’d been in Paris at the time. Or was it Rome? Their father had called to scream at her that he couldn’t get out of a meeting to go get his daughters and that he had plans for the night. He’d threatened to sue her. Each of the girls had texted to ask where she was and when the guilt had gotten too bad, she’d dumped the phone in a trash can in Arizona and had never looked back.
Sunshine realized she hadn’t anticipated the memories joining her for breakfast. She probably should have thought that through before driving down here. Or maybe she’d subconsciously known what would happen and had accepted she had to deal with her past, the ugly moments that she couldn’t atone for. She’d been wrong to leave the way she had. Not just the twins but the other kids she’d looked after. She’d left Texas for London nearly a year after she’d left Santa Monica for Texas. All that might be behind her, but the shattered lives still bore scars.
She realized she couldn’t stay for breakfast. Not now. She was too embarrassed, too ashamed. She should have picked a different beach and a different coffee shop. She collected her bag and as she stood, she came face-to-face with a furious woman on the other side of the plate glass window.
“It is you!” Elle screamed. “Oh my God!”
She started to open the restaurant door but Sunshine hurried to meet her outside where at least the conversation wouldn’t disrupt everyone’s breakfast.
“How dare you show up here?” Elle demanded as Sunshine approached. “You’re disgusting, you whore. You left them. You left my daughters—you disappeared with no warning. You didn’t even have the courtesy to tell them yourself. You never answered their texts or explained. They were devastated. They cried for weeks. I had to put them in therapy to get over the fucking nanny.”
Elle’s eyes were wild. Saliva flew with each word. She was small, but still appeared threatening. “I had to fly home from my business trip and their father missed work because of you. I will hate you forever. You’re a horrible, selfish person and I hope you die alone. It’s one thing to screw with my life, but you hurt my children and for that you should suffer.”
Before Sunshine could figure out what to say or if it would be better to simply bolt, Elle slapped her hard across the face, then stalked away.
Sunshine stood alone on the sidewalk. She knew everyone in the restaurant was watching her, everyone had heard. She wanted to say it wasn’t that bad, but everything Elle had said was true. She had left the girls with no warning, hadn’t gotten in touch with them. She’d left children before, but not like that. Never so cruelly.
She walked to her car and got inside, then rested her forehead on the steering wheel and began to cry.
By nine-thirty in the evening, Declan started to get worried. He hadn’t seen Sunshine all day and while she was welcome to do what she would like on her days off, she usually made an appearance.