The Secret Child (DI Amy Winter #2)(72)

Describing it as an ‘extraordinary phenomenon’, the article spoke about the mystery of a ‘loving abuser’ and the strange and intricate relationships that sometimes formed. Although the victim’s behaviour could come as a surprise to even them, it was believed to be a strategy for survival.

Amy had a light-bulb moment as she read the article. Back then, Lillian had always been a strong character, sometimes ‘saving’ Amy from unbearable situations at home. Putting her to bed when things became ugly, telling her to be quiet for her own good. She had been the head of the household, and when Amy was taken into care the little girl had felt adrift. Then in had stepped Robert Winter, a force for good. He and Flora accepted Amy into their hearts as well as their home. He felt strong, powerful. Which is why Amy took it so badly when he died. Then Lillian wrote from prison and, despite her disgust, Amy had answered the call. Was that why she felt so compelled to visit? Had Lillian become her new bedrock?

She scanned the words, trying to make sense of her life’s twists and turns. Stockholm syndrome was defined by several conditions. Usually the victim experienced a situation perceived as life-threatening and, while living in captivity, had to gain permission for every move they made. A small gesture of kindness from their captor would strengthen the bond between them, even make the victim feel that their captor was saving their life. Feeling increasingly uncomfortable, Amy read on.

The syndrome could work both ways, the captor developing powerful feelings for their prisoner. Then there was the victim’s inability to escape – the rebound effect. The article spoke of one kidnap victim who had been raped and abused for eight years. Yet when she was told of her captor’s death, she broke down and cried. Later, she bought his home, spending time in the rooms she had been forced to clean as a child. Unable to leave the past behind, she was compelled to return.

Sighing, Amy closed the laptop. Was this what life had in store for her? For almost five years of her childhood, she had been brought up by Lillian Grimes. She was not allowed to mix with other children, for fear of what she might say. Her daily life was controlled from hour to hour, and the one time she had slipped away into the basement, she was severely traumatised by what she found. Could she ever hope to recover from such an upbringing? Was she psychologically damaged too? Perhaps that was why people like Luka sought her out. Could she use this childhood trauma to put her skills to good use, or would her experiences serve to replace patience with violence, and empathy with suspicion and regret? She shut down the thought. The internet was vast and filled with theories. She would not self-diagnose just yet.





CHAPTER FIFTY-THREE

Amy drew back her clothes hangers as she decided what to wear. Since when had she become so uptight about work clothes? And who would have thought that blacks and greys could come in so many different shades? Then there were her shirts – rows of stiff white cotton so starched they could stand up on their own. She needed a power suit if she was to face DCI Pike today. No doubt the team had complained about her outburst last night. Where did this leave her now?

She faltered as her phone vibrated on her bedside table. Donovan had tried ringing her last night but she had rejected the call. But as she picked up her phone, it was Paddy’s name flashing on the screen. He only rang her mobile when there was something wrong.

‘What is it?’ she said, cradling her phone between cheek and shoulder as she grabbed a suit from the rack. Her movements were urgent as she threw it on the bed and chose a pair of leather ankle boots.

‘Don’t cycle to work, I’m coming to pick you up.’

Amy’s stomach tightened. ‘Why?’ Sliding off her dressing gown, she pulled on the black fitted trousers. ‘I thought I made myself clear last night. I’m done with you and the team.’

‘We messed up. You had a wobble. It’s water under the bridge now.’

Secretly, Amy was pleased, but her pride would not allow her to forgive and forget. At least, not until she heard what Paddy had to say. His hesitation filled her with dread. There was more to this than her fallout with the team. ‘What is it?’ she said, swallowing her pride. ‘Have they found Ellen?’

‘No, it’s not about Ellen,’ Paddy said, the tick-tock of his car indicator providing a backdrop to his words. ‘Last night Luka spoke to London Talk2Talk radio live on air. He told them all about Toby, span them a big sob story, and then the subject turned to you.’

Zipping up her trousers, Amy shot her right hand through her shirt. ‘You’re kidding. What did he say? I thought he was calling me later?’

‘Oh, he is. If the eyes of the world weren’t upon us before, they’ve got front-row seats now. I’m surprised you didn’t hear about it. It’s all over the news and on TV.’

Amy groaned. She had been avoiding the news channels since word broke about her connection to Lillian Grimes.

‘I’ll pick you up in my car, explain on the way. If you sit in the back, the journos won’t see you through the tinted windows.’

Amy cast an eye over the clock on the wall. It was 6.25 a.m. If the journalists were gathering now, what was it going to be like later on? It was fortunate she had recently moved in with her mum and they didn’t have her address. ‘Where are you?’

‘Driving to the nick, but I turned around to get you when I saw the media scrum outside. I can be with you in ten minutes?’