The Secret Child (DI Amy Winter #2)(70)

Amy’s grey eyes alighted on him in disbelief. Really? she thought, unable to trust herself to utter the words aloud. You’re going to go there now?

‘The team . . .’ Paddy frowned, his discomfort evident. ‘Well, ma’am, the team feel you’re being too easy on the kidnapper.’

‘Do they now?’ Amy said. The fact that Paddy had called her ‘ma’am’ was enough to raise her guard.

‘Mmm,’ Paddy continued. ‘Empathising with him a little too much. I mean, we don’t even know if he’s Luka. He could be anyone.’

‘So while Christina Watson was slashing her wrists, the office gossips were busy picking holes in my running of the investigation. Who put you up to this? Was it Molly? Gary? I hope you put them straight.’

‘It doesn’t matter who it was. The fact is, I agree.’ He rose briefly, fully closing the door before settling back down. ‘It’s bound to affect you . . . all this stuff with Lillian Grimes. It’s easy to see how you could empathise with someone like Luka at a time like this. But this guy . . . he’s playing on your heart strings. Making a fool of you.’

Amy’s jaw clenched as Paddy’s words cut to the bone. The dynamics between them weren’t always as those between a sergeant and a DI should be. As her ex-tutor, sometimes he slipped back into that role. He should respect her decisions instead of doubting them. She wasn’t eighteen anymore. But Paddy continued, oblivious to her darkening mood.

‘It’s the rubber-band effect.’ He checked for understanding, frowning slightly at the scowl on Amy’s face. ‘You and Lillian Grimes . . . as much as you want to move on from your past, you can’t let go. Like a rubber band, you find yourself being dragged back to where you came from. It’s why you sympathise with Luka. He spent his childhood in captivity too.’

‘I can’t believe I’m hearing this.’ Amy rose from her chair. ‘I thought we’d got over my news. Seems I was wrong.’

‘Wait,’ Paddy said, as Amy reached the office door. ‘I didn’t mean to upset you . . .’ But his words trailed behind her as she joined her colleagues.

‘So,’ she said, hands on hips as she stared down her team. ‘You think I’m being too soft, do you? Fraternising with the enemy?’ Inside, a small voice advised her not to be so silly, to take their comments on the chin. But her anger could not be stemmed, and Paddy’s words had made her blood boil. She had not expected to add him to the list of people who had let her down.

A hush descended over the office as keyboards silenced and telephone calls came to an abrupt end.

‘You think you can do a better job than me? Then go ahead, be my guest.’ Amy paced the length of the room, pausing at Molly’s desk, which was littered with glittery pens and coffee-stained paperwork. ‘Those tasks I set you. Why hadn’t you safeguarded Christina Watson in time?’ She turned to Gary. ‘Where were you when I asked you to oversee Nicole to make sure she was OK?’ She stared at Paddy with unconcealed fury as he approached. ‘That’s two women we’ve let down in this investigation. You were meant to oversee the team, make sure everything got done. Christina should have been found in time. Her death is down to us.’

‘Boss,’ Steve piped up, ‘Molly was re-interviewing Dr Curtis and we were focusing on finding the courier. We had no way of knowing the suspect would go after the orderlies too.’

‘Why not?’ Amy snapped. ‘It seems obvious to me. I set those tasks and you all ignored them because you thought you knew best. Now Christina is dead, maybe Ellen too. But that’s OK . . .’ She threw her hands in the air, her voice taking on a manic edge. ‘Because all you’re worried about is working with a Grimes! What’s the problem?’ Amy scanned the room. ‘Scared I’ll turn into a serial killer overnight? Well, I’ll make it real easy for you. Tomorrow morning, I quit. This case and this team. You can speak to Luka. See how far you get.’

Turning on her heel, Amy marched out of the door, but Paddy was close behind.

‘Bloody hell, hold up a minute!’ he shouted after her, his face flushed. But Amy was in no mood to listen. She stood by every word. Her team no longer had her back.

‘Why don’t you come back in, we’ll—’

‘Don’t!’ Amy’s lips formed a thin white line and she raised her palms at him in a gesture to stop. ‘I don’t trust myself around you right now, so back the fuck off!’ It was the first time she had sworn at him. The first time she’d treated him with disrespect. But she had to put some distance between them if there was any coming back from this.





CHAPTER FIFTY-TWO

Amy’s footsteps were heavy as she wheeled her bike on the pavement. She would hop on it in a minute, she just needed to catch her breath first. The cool night air played with her hair, and she brushed back the loose strands dancing around her face. Her outburst could cost her dearly. It frightened her how quickly she lost her temper these days. Poppy Grimes, the scared little child she once was, had taken up residence inside her. Now Amy’s insecurities had made her lash out for the first time in her career. An undercurrent of anger still lingered. What were her team feeling now she had walked out? Regret? Relief?

She raised her eyes to the sky. The moon was full, occasionally cloaked by some evil-looking clouds. Did that mean it was going to rain tomorrow? Paddy had texted to offer . . . no, insisted on giving her a lift home, but her sharply worded response had left him in no doubt that she wanted to be alone. Besides, the cycle home would give her time to think. It would offer her the opportunity to untangle some of the thoughts in her head. She paused to straddle her bike.